I have been with my girlfriend for almost 18 months now and we have had sex probably fewer than a dozen times. When we do, I have to start hinting days, sometimes even a week in advance that I'd really like to do it soon, and then when we finally get around to it, she's still shy and very reserved; she doesn't like it when I go down on her (and that is my favorite thing to do) not because it isn't enjoyable, but because "it's weird" - I've figured out over the course of our relationship that this is the way she says something makes her uncomfortable for an undefinable reason, but it doesn't make things much easier as more or less anything outside the basics is "weird" and makes her balk in bed. I can't use toys or my mouth. I have been in two relationships previously, both of whom were wild dynamos in bed and were up for sex pretty much all the time, so to me our sex life is seriously lacking and has been stale for a long time, and it's getting incredibly frustrating. I have needs! I don't know what to think about this, because I am the first girl she has been with and she was in only one relationship before me, and she never gave the guy more than a couple of reluctant hand jobs. I recognize that I'm not exactly smokin' hot, but I am quite good in bed and I wish that I could help her loosen up enough that I could show her that. I want very much for both of us to be happy and satisfied and sexually healthy in this relationship, but at the same time I don't want to push her to do things that make her uncomfortable. What should I do???
Before anyone asks, I should mention that she doesn't have any kind of...history, you know what I mean, that would cause this. (The reason I know is because I do have a "history" but have moved past it and have a healthy attitude toward my sexuality, and she knows this; we've discussed it at length and so I know she doesn't have a similar experience.)
How old are you two? If you're young I wouldn't be concerned, she'll come around. If you're in your 30s then something is wrong and I'd say your sex life will be non existent if you continue to stay with this women.
I'm in the same boat as you are... So I really couldn't provide any advice here.. My gf is 21 and I'm 28. I would love to think that a 21 year old woman would be sex crazed.. However that is NOT the truth. I myself love sex, I could have sex every day and still not be satisfied. Pretty sure I need it at least twice a day lol.. Yeah I'm at a real loss here.