Hey guys, I dont know if this thread goes in this category but I didnt find any other one that could fit best Alright, I have a host sister (long story, i am an exchange student) and we live in a community with 500 people, at the high school 100 people, and at our junior class, 28 people? And okay, like she is a nice girl you know, but her best friend (or what she considered her) just use her; she uses my host sister because she doesnt have any friends at school, only outside. So when my sister wants to hang out with her, she is a bitch! She ditches her off and you know, tell excuses like "you dont want to be there" I really need help, I really wanna help her! I dont know what kind of advice to tell her, cause there is no other girls at our high school that are nice and.. just there is no options, and I already told her that she has to wait until college to get real good friends. But I know thats not enough... Oh well, please help, that would be amazing Sorry about the title, it can be offensive to some people
Well I think you pretty much said it. She's a twat and uses your "sister". There's no changing her, so how about find people who might be nice, but you don't know it? there should be another 12+ females in your junior class, and then there's three other classes, you do realize you can have friends who are not the EXACT same age as you, right? It's okay to have friends in school, you don't have to be firmest friends and see each other every minute to have some friendly company in class, in this "twat"'s defense. Regards and black power; roorshack
The thing is, my sister is not that outgoing.. she is kind of an introverted person and i mean she has friends from other classes and stuff but not GOOD friends. Its a small school and there is no one she can hang out with cause people here dont feel like making new friends (seriously) Should I talk to the "twat" or just try to help her in the last 7 days im here?
Don't worry about using twat - it's one of my favourite words! I think if you're leaving in 7 days there's not much you can do except be her friend while you're there!
You won't be able to talk someone into being a different person. It's too bad that she doesn't have friends, but not everyone has great social abilities, I have horrible ones and paid for it strongly in high school, by having about 4 friends, and about 2 of them being good friends, if not just 1. But I learned from it, and life goes on. I'm much more happy go lucky about friends now, because the worst that can happen is I never talk to them, but it's hard to get into this mindset. Just be a good friend yourself, and try to explain all this and open her up a bit. Also, be careful, when getting introverted people to socialize you can put them in a situation they're too naive to handle, with very bad effects.
yeah, there's probably not much you can do in a week. make sure you have her contact information and keep in touch with her once you're gone. also, i think you're wrong about people not wanting to make new friends in your school. i went to a similarly small school, and by the end EVERYONE was friends with EVERYONE, just because it would be too boring and lonely otherwise. on top of that, people would branch their friendships out to neighboring towns, which your host could probably do as well.
haha good yeah I am her friend but I dont want her to be sad and lonely when I am gone True, but then she will never socialize :/ also I mean she is not THAT introverted, she is just like... she complains a lot you know? The worst part is that she knows it she just doesnt bother changing. Well, she knows everyone, but nobody invites her for anything. There was a time that she had to invite herself there
tell her to keep doing this. in my rather vast experience with small town parties, it's usually just assumed that everyone knows about it and nobody bothers giving out official invitations. and even if it's just some people hanging out somewhere, it's not that hard to say "hey, can i come?" or you could sign her up for the internet, and she can socialize on there until she goes off to college. that's kind of a last resort though, on the off chance that she is really just that hated in her town.
She probably would bother changing, but is shy and/or has social anxiety/acceptance issues or fears. At least, that's what I'd guess. Even if they lie about it, even to themselves, that describes a lot of introverted people. (not of course, all..... what if she's just a loner and happier that way?)
I dont know... I dont think she is a loner and happy that way because she was really pissed when she was telling me that, and also disappointed. BUT, maybe she is introverted and she is just trying really hard not to show it. heh
