the time is not far off when magic shall prance joyfully through the world again when fairies and elves and all magical beings, long hidden, shall have their humors in open sites among the boring ones who trap dreams which shall all slip from their fingers and the old evil shall be undone, none more to deny and the immortals will return and there shall be no more shyness and a great humor will fall through each temple and each glade and shrine and all beings will take up in some way the call of eternal love, and there shall be no more limits or restriction and no more so, and all shall know eachother as family and every battle will be a battle of laughter, coalescing love and intense peace manifesting in different non harming ways to create greater pleasure and instill deeper and deeper wisdom through earnest striving and hard work, as all things will be so bountiful, for the dreams will have upheld it all, and in everyone a king shall be alive, and greed and austerity will have no meaning. the beings in the skies will reach down as we reach down to the ants and in every world we shall be connected and dance and change our place forever as the gods juggle and rest among mortals and share their secrets for the crystal of Gaia shall be activated and we shall all live as we truly are, in the infinite yonato which exists in every soul, we will be free of that which stops it from flowing into this world and so with mere thoughts we shall know true wealth, beyond our games of money, but a deep content, from the dancing of the celestial spheres which are alive even now, wizards will come back in polite and noble but wild hearted form, the pursuit of God shall no longer be marked by restraint but by openness, joy and total trust in the chaos, which is the essence of the universe, we shall never understand but it shall dance with us, like caterpillars dance with the peat in the summers of the ages, we all shall be then complete the time is not far off, Christ knows and in every smile, even now it grows, magic is real, the Goddess sows, there is no jealous no difference all will be welcome at every temple and wanti will again grow in all hearts and the plants who listened then will speak with the wisdom we all seek, and there will be no more sickness and no more true pain, though we still will feel, but we will live deep in truth, people will remember to fly again and many adventures will set afoot and this realm shall be known as the realm of dream, countries as they are known now shall mostly disintegrate and the world shall be a great and lucid wandering, cannabis, mushrooms and all visionary plants, and all plants the sacred ness shall grow abundantly and be consumed freely and with universal and spontaneous reverence and shall bestow many gifts among all beings in this way, thus hath spoken Sidnu (this is actually Sidnu's prophecy not the yomo's sry for the confusion) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=24pOo5htg9E"]YouTube - Sleep: Dopesmoker‏
im a horrible person please judge me and take out your anger at me, suspect me of terrible things and shun me because its probably true its not them, its me im manipulative, cruel and lazy, perverted and also wrong, dangerous to innocent minds also self centered, i dont listen to others, though sometimes i pretend to i'm a charismatic cult leader whose game is to control people, and lead them into my 'anything goes' realm of fantasy to steal their money and get them to feed my ego, while they become weaker and more defenseless and eventually have no way out all the while spewing my propaganda to create divisions and seperation between individuals and the unity of the natural world, to make them violent against eachother under the pretense of divine decree and that it will make cannabis legal especially for medical patients who need it and i come from a long line of people like me http://www.schizophrenia.com:8080/jiveforums/thread.jspa?messageID=306288񊱰 Ericsbat (InI) - Damn, everything you described, I have felt about myself. I friend of mine even said to me one time, "I guess your whatever". Kinda like anything goes. I really think a lot of what you described comes with schizophrenia. I have been there and the only thing that brought me out was medication. If you were healed today, I don't think you would feel anything like you feel now. It comes with the disease and maybe even the lifestyle. I found that when I was being manipulative it was when I was manipulating myself trying to figure out how to be. If I was alone at the time it probably wouldn't have done any harm, but I wasn't. I was working at a pizza shop, and the owner told me that if I didn't quit being so manipulative, I would be fired. It was really me manipulating myself and in turn it manipulated the people around me. You're a good person, and it's just the disease. I'm sure a lot of other schizophrenics have felt the same way. Have you ever been to a party and noticed people getting out of hand around you. I always thought it was just me and that I had to do something different to change people because for some reason they were to dumb to realize what the fuck they were doing. Me changing myself is where the manipulation begins, and it never stops. I did it with good intentions, but I didn't realize the repercussions. You are a good person, and I don't think you do any of this on purpose. I doubt any of that stuff was really going on anyways, but I felt like it was. It got so bad at one point to where I felt like I had to control everything and put an end to people "following in my steps". Nothing works though. I think it is just a misperception or something. InI - yeah, maybe so, we don't really believe its true, just feel like thats kind of whats starting to be insinuated about us, and something that we've personally gone through to some degree, kind of a low level of sexual/psychological abuse but hard to get rid of. We did used to feel a lot like it was our job to balance the 'Group Consciousness' and keep it real, positive, transmute all demonic forces to celestial, etc. now we're at a point where, its really of no use, I think the demons realized what was going on and effectively bound us to make it stop. We have to find a new method now, its become more about solving riddles it seems like, and pure devotion, is always backhanded by reason (you are blindly following, think of the harm thats being caused to the environment, it'll never come to fruition, you're just being ripped off) We purposely tried from the start to actually avoid the kind of situation we described above, but now the signs of this kind of accusation coming up in the future, we figured better to put it out as a joke so people could see how ridiculous it is before hand. It started long ago, the times were good but occasionally the Christians in town would come around when InI was walking down the street to say 'Hey, you play guitar, better go to church and play with our band' and things like this, it was during a time when InI was practicing pretty intense witchcraft for the purpose of healing the forest, and suddenly spontaneously became hugely more in touch with InI's faery roots. It was a period of great highs and lows, extremely noisy neighbors, who kept InI up all night always seeming to play this horribly bad and impossibly seeming arhythmic hip hop song drum loop into the wee hours of the morning at excessive volumes, but the sidhe also were there in full force, and many of InI's friends in my head, there was a great forest, InI spent most of our time there. We never met too many other people, aside from a friend of a friend, from a few years past, and they were dragon people anyways, datura witches, not that thats particularly a turn off for me, somehow I have an affinity with the moonflower plant, though I consider myself in InI's heart to be Chaotic Good or Neutral Good, maybe True Neutral on the clearest days (Chaotic Neutral), and the plant has a penchant for being associated with poison, power, illusion, and real evil, but also great spiritual wisdom. I always felt my heart was fortified with love. Anyways, we come to deeply know an unseen side of that place and barely knew the seen side at all, when we moved, when suddenly the angry ghosts started to become too much, and we chickened out, the area we moved to (which we foolishly chose not to look at beforehand, parents decided, we felt too incapacitated to go and be social at any level most of the time, mainly why we spent most time in the woods) unfortunately was in a way worse. The faeries have been all but banned here, even deep in the woods, and we continuously try to uprise but are unfamiliar with what the sacred formula is, this place is plagued by a horribly divisive confucinism and duality which imposes itself upon everyone who walks down the street. We are immediately classified as shamans, and suspected of brewing Ayahuasca because we live on Brewers House road and seem like fairly open minded people, and there is a Jurema tree, nearby at the lake, we do no such thing though. Our main goal is attaining a medical cannabis prescription because that is what we have been using to aid our illness. Though we are able to get by to some degree without having it, when people are saying it does not seem to be helping, these are times when we have not used it for several days and the lingering effects begin to come back things get more tense etc. at this point, we haven't used any cannabis in about a week, usually when we get it we smoke a very small amount, once or twice a day and this just gets us to a cool state of happy equilibrium, symptoms are not entirely gone, but something about the character of it all just seems to make us and our dealing with the world a lot less abrasive, and less compelled are we to take action based in delusion, which causes more attention to us on the outside and then in turn makes us more paranoid, causes more action by us and it becomes a vicious cycle. We have tried many medications, its not simply a matter of not liking them, its a matter of physically being unable to take them, we have horrible allergic reactions to all anti psychotics we've been perscribed, which number 4 or 5 risperdal, abilify, zyprexa... the other two I cannot remember at the moment, the worst of which was risperdal. Also when reading about the symptoms, it just concerns us that they are linked to brain disintegration etc, sometimes hospitalization can occur, even if its taken exactly as perscribed. It seems that for InI this is more likely to happen anyways because of the allergic reactions. The cannabis works effectively, in combination with regular appointments I think really great things could be achieved, we could really 'go places' and get somethings done, unfortunately no one has yet been willing to give us a chance. We don't really take kindly to being repeatedly offered medication and this becoming the focus of the sessions, which is sometimes what happens. Why can we not meet at a middle ground for this? InI also use the herb in my spiritual practice, as a meditation aid and have been doing this even before being diagnosed with schizophrenia or having the first break, so I understand how to use and not abuse, and the general energy which surround the plant, which I have always felt an affinity for, and wanted to grow and have learned much about in terms of healing properties, InI a large advocate of legalization, but that doesn't mean InI's use is not medicinal, we don't see how others feel so able to judge this for us, when they do not see our day to day life, they don't understand what we go through. Wantism came to us from a prayer that one day it would be understood, it sees all traditions as being one, and not against eachother, but a part of the same vision within existence, it also encourages personal gnosis and going between many dieties, whose outward form is different while essentially they are the same divine force which is in all things, in some ways this is similar to Kemeticism, and concepts of NTR (this is also our understanding of all paganism and the world in general, there are myriad forms to rejoice in but all are expressions of the One), the best way we can describe it is a taoist jewish fairy buddhism, even though maybe that makes no sense. It is helpful to us but perhaps it alienates us from the reasoning world in some ways, we cannot help this though, we must be ourselves, but feel we still have the right to receive in a predicable fashion medication that works, and does not harm, without fear or inviting negative influence. When the peace of wood is disturbed more and more it makes it harder to find other ways to cope, we also pray for the prosperity of all plants of this area and the world and that their healing and uses can be found by those who need them at the right time, so people can develop a real relationship with the wild, not just as something to be controlled, written over, or manicured, but as an something which we all extend from, which blossoms with a sacred beauty, not total chaos, but a very intricate and organic kind of order which need not be imposed so intensely. We enjoy writing about wantism but don't really expect others to take it up, though if they get something from an idea great, and if it really moves them great, it is always nice to find someone to practice with, but at the same time, doing it alone, or communing more on an astral level is in someways more liberating, not that there is no physical connection, but it is a form of magic that has mostly to do with dreams, I think the connections happen spontaneously and too much organization would go against the quiet but also warm and loving spirit of the way. We feel it would teach itself to anyone who seeked earnestly to know in the way most appropriate to them, which maybe differs from the way appropriate to us. There is no existence or nonexistence, in the end must admit that We in the fullest sense are indeed making it up for ourselves inspiration is our Dianandia, love in all its forms and seasons is our worship Kalkiavatar- maybe cut back on it a little, noone wants to read a long winded schizophrenic rambling InI - Dojaphene - Cybele https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=djBFmrj0Rz4"]YouTube - Cybele sings an original, "Dojaphene"‏ I think maybe she should cut back... this is true excess she sings of, which can also been good sometimes (all things in moderation), but that is not what I'm talking about InI has already cut back from this point for the most part, though sometimes we all must have a little fun.
we're saying we not because we're crazy but because of the winkte tradition, (which has not that much to do with germany wtf internet?) and yeah the moonflowers were more of a phase, not something that InI is really interested in doing again, though its interesting to just have them around sometimes