If someone cares more

about their body and the way they look saying thats the only thing that will make them happy, than YOU altogether, thats pretty fucked am i right? Not gonna get into details but yeah the person i care about most is telling me that they are not happy with themself and want to fix themself and that is more important than ME.
Really causing me pain as i thought she cared about me more than that, not sure what i should think mabey she really wants something else more than she wants me mabey i will just never understand that at all since all i wanted was her.
Input?
Keep in mind this is honestly a beautiful girl by ANYbodys standard she still isnt happy with her body.
I just feel like im not worth shit now... Just wanted a girl that would make me their first priority. I guess its too much to ask.

 

Now I know I'm a woman and I don't care what I look like anymore now if me and my husband go out now ill dress up but when I get home that night its back to my bj pants lol

 

Yeah this girl is like the only thing that matters is fixing myself, she used to show me a lot of care and love but making her body the way she wants is a bigger deal now because things didnt work out for her the way she had planned. She says she still cares about me but told me straight up yeah i guess all that is more important than u are. Pretty much crushed me.

 

Superficial girls do superficial things...that's the way of life.

Find someone REAL that will appreciate you and be confident in their own skin

 

She probably is just insecure with herself. It can be a mental problem for some people. She probably does care about you but has poor body image. You can't be happy with anyone until you're happy with yourself. Or it could be the complete opposite and she's conceited.

 

yeah, i'd say so. maybe second priority, but more important than herself is just kind of creepy.

 

Yeah lumin i u hit the money dead on... I am just let down by all of this. Part of me wants to accept her for how she thinks and what she cares about but part of me is like hmm mabey im not all i thought i was to her.
And i agree with you lovely malia too, but that is a bit harsher way of putting it although i do agree a bit...

 

I mean yourself always comes first sure, but she is perfectly healthy and beautiful but she still isnt the way she wants to be and is completely insecure about her body right now.
Through my eyes she is the prettiest girl i have ever met and is perfect in every way especially her body and i have told her that soo many times but she says thats different and that its all she actually wants.

 

it is nice to know that someone believes this of her, but honestly, if she is not happy with herself and is lacking confidence

she should surely try to work on that. she obviously doesn't agree - we all see beauty as something different.

 

YEah its not just me, everyone thinks she looks great as she is, except herself. Guess she deserves to be who she wants who am i to say otherwise.

 

bodies are forever

boyfriends are easily replaced

I think she's right in her thinking

 

what did you mean by 'fix', by the way?

 

Does she want a boob job and you don`t want her to get one?

I`m sorry, but I am still trying to figure out what the specifics are.

 

You won't change her thoughts man. Been there, done that. Its best to support her with her choices and when she talks about how much she dislikes herself, just say what you think in a few seconds and move on. If she wants to keep talking about it put your foot down and say you said all you have to say. You will never win that argument. Ever.

 

I used to feel that way too. Everyone says I'm really pretty. It's hard to see yourself like that. I mean you're so used to seeing yourself it's hard to compare yourself to beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I think it's easier to find something else beautiful before yourself. Even if a person does find themselves pretty, most girls do that bashful thing and won't admit it. lol shut up, I'm not pretty.... I'm sure she'll grow out of it and see what's really important. You shouldn't have to change yourself so drastically. Maybe lose a little weight or try a new makeup or hair style...but it doesn't have to life-changing. or relationship-changing in your case.

 

Maybe her body image issues are causeing her to have a hard time loving herself.
I mean if you dont love yourself its hard to try&love someone else.
It doesnt mean she doesnt care about you.
Maybe she feels as though she must deal with her personal issues before she can deal with a relationship.
Since i dont know you or her i cant really say or the situation but this might be one reason.
I mean best of luck with everything.
I hope that you guys get everything worked out.

 

If you want to be someone's world; stop being a character in hers and find a girl that wants to appreciate you the way that you'll appreciate her.

 

life is too short

 

Yeah thanks guys for the input, appreciated it sorry about the vague details, she does get pissed when i tell people about her business.

 

I think you do need to be comfortable with who you are before entering a relationship, or it'll most likely end in disaster. Hence why at this point in time I'd never even consider getting romantically involved with anyone. It wouldn't be fair on me, or any potential boyfriend to start a relationship when I have extremely low self esteem, and hate how I look so much.

Fresh, maybe you can wait for her? I dunno. But I definitely think a relationship with this girl now would be a bad move. If you're unhappy with yourself, it will only drag down a relationship.

Good luck Alex, I hope you find happiness whether its with this girl or someone else. You deserve it.