I hate majority of jobs only take online applications

I apply for like 17 jobs (seriously i did that many) online and take some dang 100 question test for every single place and do not even get 1 interview.

 

I fucking hate that shit too. If possible, in those circumstance, I just email them my CV and say I'm not wasting my time with you online application, all the information you need is on there. Usually that doesn't get me the job, which is often the point.

I did one online questionnarie/test thing for Greggs once. Took me half an hour to complete, then when it finished it said i wasn't a suitable candidate!!!

Cheeky fucks.

 

i feel your pain man... often your best shot is to show up and tell them you applied online though if they say to wait until you're contacted then you're probably fucked

 

Applying online is a great way for them to say they are interested in you but then shoot your application into the filing cabinet with your information and the rest of everyone else who tried.

 

The solution is simple:

DON'T be honest. It is very easy to lie on multiple choice online job applications (I'm assuming you mean those) and you can even lie if it's not multiple choice.

Just give the answers that you think they would want to hear or better yet, research it and then do it!

Don't be fucking honest, this is the job world we're talking about. Being honest gets you NOWHERE in these things, in case you haven't noticed.

 

I agree, this sucks. They just end up hiring the best liar. It doesn't give them a good idea who you are. The questions are often too broad to answer also like "I always like to take the lead in any situation" if you say no, you're a wimp who doesn't lead, say yes (which is what they want) you're a person who always has to run everything. I lead when I know enough about the work to lead, I follow when someone else is the expert, but I can't say that in their stupid, shallow, half assed online application. I've gotten every job I've gotten by calling HR and talking to them. Some jobs are posted through staffing firms that won't connect you with a real person, I say fuck them, they're impersonal places that will treat you like an object. The ones I've gotten by reaching a real person were always far more respectful of their employees and more concerned with their well being.

 

I've applied for 2 jobs online this month. The first one called me back the day after, I had an interview 2 days after that, and was hired. I applied for another job last week, and they called me about an hour ago to tell me I have an interview on Friday.

The reason I did so well on the first one is that my friend who works there tipped me off ahead of time about the personality quiz. There were about 100 questions, and I was instructed to answer in the most kiss-ass way possible. He told me that his supervisor took the quiz and failed, and that it doesn't matter what's actually true. If I didn't get enough answers correct, the appication wouldn't even go through to the person reviewing them. So I did. I wasn't honest at all, and they hired me a few days later.

The reason I have an interview for the second job is that I'm impressive as fuck.:sifone:

 

Id rather fill out surveys. Maybe win a walmart gift card.. Fuck that job shit.. Sends resume : waits for calls..

 

Maybe they checked your facebook.. Time to get rid of those drunk naked pics

 

I feel better knowing all my information is in a dusty envelope underneath a counter somewhere instead of on a easily hacked into account.

 

same here man. It's all so complicated to get a fucking job. I hate the online apps.

fucking how about this...

give em a piece of paper with your name and number on it and they call you simple as that. come to work get paid. lol.

 

I've taken to not applying to any that wont accept my default Careerbuilder or Indeed resume's. Really getting annoyed with all these companies having their own online resume builder's,,, especially as they are seem to follow the same fucking template...

And wtf is it with the crappy resume parsing on some of these job boards anyway? Makes the cellphone Predictive texting seem like Star Trek Tech...

 

my job required an online application. After i got hired i would see people applying online in the store and my manager would be tellng them to lie on the questions part. gotta lie and make them think your some fucking god