Help meee :-(

Discussion in 'Dreadlocks' started by Earth-Mama, Aug 15, 2011.

  1. Earth-Mama

    Earth-Mama Guest

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    I posted a while ago saying I was starting out my dread journey. Not sure how long it's been - 6 weeks maybe? Ok, I know it has to get worse before it gets better, but this mess is just going from bad to worse and I need some help/advice.

    I've used no products on it, no wax etc, started by backcombing - it was fine for the first couple of weeks, a mess obviously but I had no worries as I know it's a long process before it starts looking ok. I've been washing it in residue free bar soap to begin with - every 3/4 days as it was getting pretty greasy - then phased that out to a bicarbonate of soda/lemon juice/tea tree rinse on an approximately weekly basis. That's all I've been doing, I figured the natural approach was best.

    Now it's all just horrendous. I have a halo of thick matted hair covering my whole scalp - all the hair feels fully locked together, I've tried ripping it back into the sections but it isn't really making any difference. The matting is well over an inch thick and covers my whole head like a hat. And all the individual 'dreads' have now mostly separated into a bunch of tiny horrible locked up rats tails - probably even thinner than rats tails - with only the occasional fat (and by fat I mean comparitively, they were always fairly thin as I have thin hair) one. They have all gone a crazy wiggly shape (my natural hair is poker straight btw) and all of them have loops coming out all the way down. I know you can poke loops back in with a needle but seriously if you could see how many loops there are you'd realise how much of an infeasible option that is. I also have heaps of loose hair strands coming out all over my head. The condition of it looks disgusting, it's so greasy (I've started washing it less often though as washing seemed to always make it worse), and today all of a sudden I have heaps of dry skin/dandruff type stuff all over my matted halo.

    What the hell is up with it... please advise! I have followed all the advice from you guys - stopped palm rolling, not used wax, kept it natural - tell me what I'm doing wrong because right now I'm beginning to wish I'd ignored everything you guys had told me and just gone to a pro and got it all waxed up and done everything that most people I meet with great looking dreads seem to do. I know in my heart that's not right but please tell me why I've followed the advice I've found here and got this seemingly irreparable mess on my head while those I know who swear by all the products have an apparently amazing head of dreads - because I'm getting a little stressed about it!
     
  2. Earth-Mama

    Earth-Mama Guest

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    Sorry, I didn't mean that to sound like I'm blaming anyone else, I'm just majorly stressed about it and frightened I'll have to shave my head. I'm not superficial in the slightest and my concern about my appearance wholly stems from the fact that I am a self employed birth doula among other things and rely on people to not think I'm a crazy person to make a living and feed my children. I am happy looking a mess if I know there's an awesome end in sight but I really am feeling that this isn't going to end up good... can it be saved and if so how? (I would include a photo but my camera is rubbish and just doesn't demonstrate what I'm talking about). Just had a feel of it all and I was being kind by saying rats tails - half of them are thinner than mouse tails...
     
  3. barefootlocks

    barefootlocks Senior Member

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    Hmmmm...I have a feeling its not as bad as you think.

    Trust me tho, youre doing the right thing by not using wax or other products.
    As far as the tangled parts on your scalp. i have that too. I suggest waiting till it grows out a bit more and then try seperatingnthem. Cant really work too hard on hairs that are too close to the scalp. If it really bothers you see if you can work some of the hairs loose in the shower. Wet hair is easier to work with imo and its less damaging.

    Loose hairs--theres always going to be loose hairs. Over time some of them will get worked into the surrounding dreads, but in my experience the hairs around your hairline will never fully dread. Just gotta learn to love em babe.

    The mess will get better eventually, but its gonna take between 9-12 months if you have hair like me (sounds like you do). As far as your job goes, you can always wear a hat or tie them back Aunt Jemmima style with a pretty scarf or somethin. Get creative. Play around with new styles and materials until you can find an acceptable work hairstyle because like I said, its gonna be messy for awhile.

    It sounds like youre doing everything right and your hair is starting to dread. Dont fuss with it, everrything will work out. :)
     
  4. RooRshack

    RooRshack On Sabbatical

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    Pictures?

    Rip whats against your scalp, and it'll be fine. You can probably rip more than you think. But don't habitually rip, like daily, because the more you rip the more you need to rip, because the torn hairs will matt up faster and faster the more you pull them apart. Rip just often enough to keep things from getting unrippable, but when you do rip do a thorough job.
     
  5. SkyWise777

    SkyWise777 Guest

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    Earth Mama, id like to let you know this is exactly what i went through when i first started my natural locks from backcombing, the key ingredient in growing dreadlocks is "Patience" your dreads are extremely young if youve only had them 6 weeks

    ive had my dreads for about a year and 9 months my dreads fell apart at first because the backcombing was realllyyy loose and just became a bunch of loose tangled hairs but i left them to do their own thing, i felt hey if dreads aint for me then my hair wont dread, over time my negected dreads started to take shape and theyve been doin their own thing since i let them congo and loop and do what ever else they wanna do pureee freedom

    so the loops your getting is your dreadlocks actually tightening up its all part of the locking process, you should think about maybe Plaiting(similar to braids) your loose hair, and the dandruff is from your scalp still getting used to the new hair style
    heres some pics of my messy locks and a link to my Photobucket acc if u wanna look at the progress my Dreads have made since (i use no products in my hair just let it grow just like you)

    heres a link to my photobucket acc so u can see how my dreadlock journey has been so far (the order is backwards so page 3 is the start of my journey Page 1 is latest pic)
    http://s1201.photobucket.com/albums/bb344/Chronologic777/

    early when the hair was still locking
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    Now a year+
    [​IMG]


    so ya to sum everything up your not doing anything wrong like you said, its gotta get worse before it can get better, and believe me it gets extremely worse when going natural but in the end your locks will look sooooo good all you need is time and patience, think of your hair as children, does a child mature at 6 weeks? 6 months? no takes years for a child to mature, so next time your staring in the mirror dreading your locks(no pun intended) just remember this 1 word PATIENCE its all you need :) hope this helps
     
  6. vigilanteherbalist2

    vigilanteherbalist2 Senior Member

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    You need to chill the fuck out.
    6 weeks?!
    Up until about 4ish months in, you have to rip the sections daily (not all at once, ouch). It's not a lost cause, just rip a few every once in a while.

    Loops...did you read the FAQ?
    They are a sign that your hair is locking. A lot of them will get sucked in or matted down. I would not suggest you do anything to fuck with them.

    When we gave you advice we never claimed that this method would give you "great looking dreads" like you seem to want. Real locks have character, loops, zig zags, and loosies. If you can't handle that, go get some fake-locks.

    Ok, ok, that was kind of harsh. Sometimes that's what people need tho.
     
  7. Smelly D

    Smelly D The Dreaded Plumber

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    i found washing with bicarb was unlocking my hair, and making it softer. just use regular shampoo, its just hair. use the stuff you used before. i used shower gel once.. dont matter.. just chill out and good things will come

    also, loopies are your friends
     

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