I don't know what to do about my kitties :(

Here's the situation (I'm sorry it's so long):

There were several stray cats roaming around my fiance's apartment complex. He and his roomate left food out for one in particular: "Mama" had had a litter of kittens the summer before. I had been thinking of trying to somehow get a hold of her and have her spayed, because all but 2 of her previous litter of kittens had been taken by animal control, and one of the remaining two had become a stray, and was never properly socialized.

Anyway, one day in early March, Mama showed up after staying away for some time and....She was about-to-pop pregnant. I figured I should take her in now so she could have the kittens at my house where it was safe and they could be properly socialized. I was a little nervous about the situation, because I already had another cat at home: my Himalayan, Oceana (also a rescue). I've had Oceana for 3 years before Mama came into the picture. As I expected, Oshie was pretty pissed when Mama came to stay with us.

Long story short, she gave birth to 6 kittens. I have so far found homes for 5 of them. She was spayed in August. At the moment, I have 3 cats--Oshie, Mama, and Mama's son, Bowie.

So here's my dilemma: Oshie still hates Mama and Bowie (although Mama doesn't seem to have a problem with her, and Bowie has an all-out crush on her--always running up to her and sniffing her when he's allowed in my room). I live in a one bedroom apartment, and my room has become Oshie's territory, and the rest of the apt is where Mama and Bowie hang out. However, Bowie and Mama always try and sneak into my room when I go in and out, but I always have to separate them at night and when I'm not home.

I feel really bad for Oshie. She spends most of her time in my closet by her litter box. I read that this is where they go when they're stressed because the smell of themselves is comforting. She's a tremendously sweet cat, loves to cuddle up and sleep on my chest when she's not in the closet. When the other cats come in, she's tolerates them sometimes, but if they get too close she'll start hissing.

By now, I've formed a sort of bond with Bowie and Mama, although I've always had it in my head that it's temporary, because I don't really think Oshie will ever be happy with them in the house. I'm trying to find a home for them, but honestly, I'm worried I won't be able to find a good home for either of them. I guess I just don't trust people. Bowie is 7 mos now and about as big as Mama. Most people I've found want little kittens, because they're "sooo cute." I also haven't had him neutered yet, though I plan to, because he's a cryptorchid and it costs more, and I only just recently found a clinic with reasonable prices for those. He also has a pretty strong personality--he meows more than I'd like him too, and he's always getting in to everything. Mama is much more laid back. But for some reason, neither one of them likes to be held very much, they're socialized, but every person that has come to look at them really seems to want a super affectionate cat. (They also always try to pick them up and flip them on their backs like they're babies--cats HATE that, why do people do that?? So of course it makes it look like they hate people).

Sorry for rambling...I guess I just feel like Mama and Bowie have gotten really close, and they each have their own particular personalities, and if I have them go to separate homes with people who don't understand them they're just gonna be miserable. I know I don't have a lot of control over this, I just feel like I'm letting them down because I don't spend a lot of time with them, because I'm always in my room with Oshie because I feel guilty about her too! And to make it more exciting, this May my fiance and I are planning on moving in together to a house, and he has 2 big dogs (Oshie hates dogs too). I'm not sure I'd be able to handle 5 animals, especially if half of them hated each other.

I'm torn and feel guilty, I wish they all could get along but I don't see that happening. It's just gonna be so hard when the last kitten and Mama go. I wasn't expecting for it to take this long to find them homes. I'm just trying to go with the solution that leaves me with the least amount of guilt

What do I do? (Again, sorry for the encyclopedia article)

PS--I already contacted the humane society, they said they are full and won't take them.

 

First-It is really great that you are looking out for the strays and and inviting Mama and baby to stay with you.

Second-If you really would like to keep all three, I suggest letting Oshie and the other two hang out together in the same room only when you are home.
It is my observation that cats will adapt to each other.

I brought in a kitten with a 4 yr old already in the house.
She hissed and hissed. They fought and fought.
After 2 or 3 weeks they were always near each other. Not cuddling or anything, but buddies.

Sometimes they still try to kill each other, with actual fur flying, and 5 minutes later they are napping on the same bed, sometimes side by side.

I would just give them all time to get used to each other. They will work things out amongst themselves.

I'd worry about the dogs when the time comes.

Much good luck to you.

 

Seems like youve gave yourself quite a bit of bother here, i personally would ave left them along, or at least tryed to get them in some kind of rescue centre though i really respect what you have done and i can tell your a caring person, hats of to you try get them in a rescue centre ASAP before this situation gets worse, I would hate to here that you couldnt move in with your partner because you have this trouble with the cats.

I hope things work out for you and the cats, all the best and sorry i havent been much help i just wanted to acknowledge how kind you are but meybe you should have just left it to be unfortunately.

 

double post sorry

 

It was great for you to bring in Mama and her babies scene as she had nowhere to stay but before those kitties came along that was always Oshie's territory and it would take her a while to adapt to other cats in the home she's so used to living in on her own.

It's almost like two kids (preferably little ones) if one of them is a newcomer into the other's house a bit of jealousy gets in the way and the other one would probably get a bit pissy at the newcomer for invading THEIR home and playing with THEIR toys and so on and so forth. I mean humans and cats work differently but cats like us have feelings too and are A LOT more clever than we actually think.

I'd go with what the others said about getting Oshie to warm up to Mama and Bowie a bit more as oppose to keeping them separated from each other. My Burmese cat who is very jealous and territorial has had to get used to other cats around us and cats temporarily living with us, it's just a territory thing and also the idea of getting used to an 'intruder' in your cosy home.

It can be dealt with, Oshie just probably needs time.

 

Aw, poor you! What a dilemma! I can only imagine now torn you feel! We get so attached to our pets, it would be impossible to chose between them!

You said that you might be moving in with you Boyfriend soon, i imagine his two dogs are gonna be an even bigger problem. Are yous all gonna live in your apartment? Or are yous gonna move somewhere bigger? I am no expert, but maybe if you move somewhere new then your first cat won't feel as territorial about the new place? Maybe it will be like a fresh start for all the cats? Maybe that will do the trick?

I look after six feral cats, they live in my back garden. I have opened up my shed for them & put bads in it for them & i feed them twice a day. They are all wild, they are afraid to come indoors & they don't like to be petted. I've neutered 5 of them already but the 6th one became pregnant before i got a chance to catch & neuter her. She had one kitten 6 weeks ago, such an adorable little kitten!

I hope to take this kitten in to my house in the next two weeks to tame him & keep him as a house cat, & i'll have Mammy cat neutered straight away! It all sounds easy! But i too have a problem! I have a 4 year old dog, she is a small dog & she is the boss of our house!

My dog hates the feral cats in our garden, i don't let her out in the back garden anymore but if she sees them out through the window she goes ballistic!!! She is been very territorial! The strange thing is that when i have my dog out for a walk she often meets other cats & she is fine with them! She just hates cats in her territory!

So i am hoping that my dog stays calm enough for me to be able to tame the kitten, i will keep kitten in a crate in my spare bedroom at first. & then i really hope that once the kitten is tamed that my dog will accept the kitten in the house! Its such a worry! But i really want to give this kitten a good home, i don't want him to have to stay outdoors in the harsh winter! So fingers crossed it will all work out!!

So Strawberry Fields i do understand what you are going through, my story is different to yours but its similar in the sense that we are trying to get animals to get along so that we can give them a better life! Please let me know how you get on?! & if & when you introduce the cats to the dogs please let me know how you do it & how you get on! Best of luck!!! XXX

 

Ahhhh god bless you!!!

I love kitty cats so much,there one of gods most beautiful creatures!!

Im sure you hear alot of Meowing


I dont blame you for not trusting anyone,its hard to trust ANYONE!!


Good luck and god bless you and the kitties!!


Meow!!

 

From a background of having a "mixed" household myself.... 7 cats, 2 big dogs, and 2 birds right now,(all rescues) Part of the problem between Oshie and the other two may be being separated..... Not that they would all become friends but cats will tend to define their own space. Oshie is likely feeling that you have banished her to your bedroom when she used to have the whole apartment. I've had a few cats in the past that would not associate with others but it's rare. I'm not saying you should put them in one room and let them fight it out, but typically after a few days of hissy fits things settle down and they all define their own space. You also need to not show favoritism and this may be part of Oshie's problem seeing as she was the original cat, when Mama was brought into the house you needed to "ignore" Mama (within reason) At this point all you can do is show equal quality time among them.

Right now my only problem child is Spooky, and his deal is he likes to pick on two of the others, Lil'Boy who is deaf and has balance problems and Mister Jera, who is getting old..... but Spooky is just a creep, it's his nature...... He has always picked on those weaker than he...... He is worried about the 2 new boy cats though, he knows they will get bigger than he and they have already out Ninja'd him several times. So he leaves them alone.

Now about the dogs entering the mix, most good dogs can learn quickly via verbal commands that kitties are to be respected... that's the easy part. Cats take longer to warm up to dogs but they will and right now my kitties love "the Boys" to pieces, sleeping with them, rubbing on them, etc.

Kudos on rescuing Mama....... 5 out of my 7 current cats came from a stray that I called Mommas... They came from 2 different litters, she just kept bringing me kittens. Unfortunately before I could have her fixed she died protecting another litter she had somewhere when we had a flood last February..... Poor Mommas and her litter never made it through that mess.

Good luck, and pet the babys for me..... :2thumbsup: