I'll be as blunt and open as I can with this post, basically I'll be telling you a little bit about myself and asking a few questions. Okay, so I was a failure in school.. I didn't do a single lesson in year 11 (I think that's 11th grade to Americans I'm not sure) I just sat in the "student support center" where they basically handed me stacks of work and moaned at me when it wasn't done properly. The reason for that was because everyone hated me, and usually if I went out when everyone else in the school was around I'd be pushed and called names.. my attendance sucked anyway, I prefer'd to just walk around the village alone whilst everyone else was at school. So yeah, I failed, got horrible G.C.S.E results because I didn't really pay attention to it. I also used to be pretty depressive, I self harmed for about a year.. the only thing that made me happy was marijuana which I did for about a year until it made me extremely paranoid and I started having panic attacks etc. I've also experimented with other drugs, LSD, cocaine and a drug called M-Kat. But with that said I do feel lucky sometimes, which is why I try and be a kind, un-selfish person most of the time. Basically I'm split because half the time I'm suicidal because I have this skin condition type thing and paranoia.. But the other part of me really wants to live life, I mean, I love to read, write and study things that interest me in my own time. I don't want a regular job, I figure If I was going to make a living when I'm older it would be doing something myself.. I don't know, I guess I'm just wondering what can I do in life with no G.C.S.E results ? Other questions I have are shall I never smoke marijuana again because of anxiety ? Like, has anyone else had a panic attack from smoking it and continued ? What's the best way to take my mind off stuff and be happy ? I don't know, I'm extremely sorry if I come across as stupid or bored anyone. Just a tad desperate and you seem like the most friendly, intelligent people. Peace.
I also got paranoid after years of smoking weed. I stopped for 10years, when I tried it again I would just get into very deep thought about life, myself ,etc.. ( did alot of other drugs too) I found that I was letting the weed control my head instead of me controlling it, This I feel is the reason I got paranoid..Don't know if this will help you. Peace
Thomas, I think in your circumstances I would've been a failure in school too. I don't know much about the UK education system. I know that here in the US, you can pass a test to get a GED, which is a high school diploma equivalent certification. And you can pretty much get into a university at any age. You can go to a community college for a couple years first to prove you do good work, and then a lot of universities will accept you as a transfer student. But I don't know if there's any equivalent path in the UK. Hopefully someone will answer your post who knows something about that. My 18-year-old son Jeremy dropped out of school at age 16. It's not that he couldn't do the work - he was near the top of his class in his performance. But he felt that school was a waste of time, and he hated it. He already knew most of what they were teaching him anyway, cuz he had checked out stacks of books from the library for years. The first thing he did after he quit school was to write a novel. He sent that to a literary agent, and now he's working on a second novel. Your writing is pretty decent, btw... Years ago when I smoked marijuana, I would often get paranoid. I sometimes think I wouldn't have as much trouble with that if I smoked it now, cuz I have better self-awareness and better mental self-discipline - but maybe it's still not good enough, I dunno...I haven't tried, and have no current plans to try. I've gotten along fine without it for 36 years now, so it's no biggie for me. BTW you might find less hostility in the adult world than you did in school. There are douchebags everywhere, of course, but adults in general tend to be less biased and more generous. You might be able to find a niche in the social millieu that would welcome you...if you wanted to try that in some way.
Good day, everybody! I want to move from my city to any hippie quiet village, but I don't know, where these villages could be found. Could you tell me, where I can found it?
Dont let your skin condition get you down man, everyone has there insecurities but at the end of the day it never mattered https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZkYdFRRbpuY"]WEAR SUNSCREEN - YouTube
