I'm going mad and turning into a need girlfriend...help!

I'm dating a wonderful man, and it is relatively new (8 months) but we are in love. I'm having a problem I can't seem to work out. We spend quite a bit of time together and it is beautiful, we have great sex and he makes me so happy. He initiates most of our time together, because my theory is that if he wants to see me he will let me know, if he doesn't and needs some time to himself is no point in me asking him (which means when we see each other is always up to him, I'm kind of ok with that, I'm just terrified he will reject me if I ask to see him).

I know its very important to have space and time to ourselves, and that we need to have independent lives outside the relationship. But it hurts so bad when he doesn't contact me to get together. I miss him so much and I feel so lonely and it's only like 1 or 2 nights a week! It's not like I don't have my own things to do either or like my space... My head knows this is fine and normal but I can't seem to reconcile that with my heart. I can't help but be a little frosty the next day when he texts.

Why am I feeling like this? Any ideas how to stop being so silly? I feel like I'm going crazy and turning into one of those pathetic needy girlfriends I absolutely refuse to be. I would never tell him this is how I feel.

 

so you refuse to initiate anything with him and then get pissed that he doesn't bother to initiate with you often enough?

this is not a relationship, it's a booty call.

 

This is not a booty call. He tells me he loves me. He talks about the future. He introduces me to his friends, family and co-workers as his girlfriend. We have met the parents. We see each other 5-6 times a week and does not always involve sex.

My concern is not him, he's wonderful. I don't know how to stop feeling rejected when he's not around. I know, stupid 'issue'..

 

yeah I think you should initiate once in a while.

What if he's wondering if YOU aren't interested because he's the one that always makes the first move and you never do?

 

op-you describe the definition of ''booty call''


edit...i see underwear beat me to this point...i wrote mine without reading his till afterwards...which proves beyond any doubt that we are both right...

 

A booty call is NSA sex, no feelings involved OR one partner not taking the other seriously in terms of a relationship and it's just about sex. Or an arrangement between two adults for fun times. I don't understand what that has to do with my post. We very much have strings, he chased me for months for a relationship. He was not working at the time and now he is, so less time.

 

my boyfriend acts frosty with me when I don't hang out with him lol..don't act frosty. its annoying.

anywho. Maybe he wants to spend all his time with you, but thinks because you dont ever initiate it, you are the one that likes their space.

 

so which is it? pretty big difference there.


or do you mean it's only like 1 or 2 nights a week that he doesn't initiate? everyone needs a day off after all.

 

You have bigger issues than him. You need to get your confidence up. He should see u when u want u got the prize and he needs to work for it.

 

Another woman expecting a guy to read her mind. Why don't you go after him?

 

This is where it seems to go wrong

You should just try and ask him sometime.

 

You say it hurts you when he doesn't try and contact you, yet after seriously dating for 8 months you've rarely if ever done the same for him.

Are you so in your head you've never stopped to think about this?