sad and ashamed :-(

I was friends with this guy for long time but recently he expressed a sexual interest. I was resistant and he said that in order to get with him i had to send a pic of my boobs and private parts. I resisted for awhile but I finally gave in and sent a pic of my boobs. I sent it and he said that he didnt get them and was im SURE THAT it went through to him...but I'm sure he has them and now i feel embarrased and ashamed like he must think im disgusting or my breasts are terrible. I've never done this before and now im not sure why he is not answering me at all??? Thinking my boobs must be horrid and hes showing them all over ..... I have tried numerous times to text or call and he won't take my call....
I definitely will never do it again...I've never done that before...He's been completely silent and has not answered or replied to my text since before New Year..I have not attempted to contact him at all..but I'm just worried because I did something so reckless...:-(I am over 18 and no one can see my face at all..but now i feel exploited and the silence from his end is making me more and more nervous :-( It is playing a bit with my self esteem because I am thinking something is wrong with my body hence the silence. We never had any type of sexual contact ..this was actually the first I'd ever done anything like that..i have had numerous conversations with friends and they have all said there is nothing wrong with me but I feel very vunerable. We went out a handful times and he was always nice but flirty nothing crazy. It's playing with my self esteem and has me wondering why all of a sudden the silence even though i have not tried to contact him at since day before New Year. It was strange because the last thing he told me was that he was a little busy driving and he didnt get the pics and that if i was sure i had sent them to him but I'm pretty sure they went through to him. i tried to everything to reach him and he would just NOT answer at all.

 

Doesn't sound like much of a friend, more like an asshole douche-bag.
Anyone that would put such a preliminary requirement to pursuing a deeper relationship is a douche-bag asshole and not even worth the trouble.
Don't beat yourself up over an asshole like that.
Text him to go fuck himself and then you go find someone who doesn't need to see naked pics of you to decide if your "worthy" of their affection.
I'm sure your more than worthy of affection, and that guy is just an asshole.
Drop him like the festering piece of shit he is.

 

@Noxious gas ... I definitely get what your saying...I just feel so manipulated and vulnerable. I have tried everything to keep myself busy but it creeps into my thoughts and messes with my self esteem. The fact that he became silent makes me think that I am not "up to par" or that there is something physically wrong with me.

 

I 100% agree with NoxiousGas. Drop the asshole-move on and find someone who cares who you are not if you will let them see you naked. Go slow and you'll find the right one.

 

Anybody wanting that as a prerequisite is not partner material at all.

Don't be embarrassed by it. He should be embarrassed for wanting what he asked for. HE expressed a sexual interest first, you just said OK.

You've done nout wrong - try not to waste your time getting upset.

 

How do i get over the feeling that something is physically wrong with me?

 

I'm not sure sweetheart, but seriously, there isn't anything wrong with you.

 

Hi Sadone

I'm guessing you're American are you?

 

Hi SadOne - I can completely understand how you are feeling.

Everybody's body is different. Your'e friends have said there is nothing wrong. It sounds to me like your assuming the worse. Try not to think the worse when something hasn't even happened yet. Remember; HERE AND NOW.

There is nothing wrong with you. I am sure you have great girl friends. They know you - not him. Question: how old is he?

 

Yes I am American...He is in his 30's ....

 

Are you much younger than him?

 

No about a year younger.

 

First of all - it's entirely possible that he didn't get them. Second of all, I'm sure your breasts are perfectly normal and attractive (and believe me when I say, someone, somewhere will love them no matter what you think of them). Thirdly, How old are you? If you're a minor - maybe the guy got freakin' arrested for kiddie porn? Finally, and I think you get this - don't upload/send nude pictures of yourself to anyone on the internet unless you're willing to risk and acknowledge the fact that someone, other than your intended viewer, is likely going to see them.

I have a friend who made a sex video with her boyfriend when they were in college - it was supposed to be for his eyes only. The relationship eventually soured (as relationships usually do) and guess what? He showed all of his friends the video and it ended up on the internet. She nearly committed suicide over it - but you know what, she didn't and eventually it went away - it didn't ruin her life, but it very well could have if she'd allowed it to.

Don't cam, don't photograph, don't videotape anything without accepting the very real possibility that if you upload it, or email it, or even store it on your hard drive, that someone can and will likely gain access to it at some point and view it. it's that simple.

 

Well, isn`t it tough to always play the good girl.

 

Ultimately, by finding somebody who finds you sexy. It will happen, sooner than you think. Then you will forget about the other guy.

No woman is perfectly happy with her body. We all have our flaws. Tyra Banks says a lot of stupid shit, but I'll never forget her saying that every supermodel has at least one thing about her body that she would like to change. Those of us who are not supermodels aren't going to fare any better. We can live with it.

I don't fault the guy for wanting to see you naked. Sex is only one part of a real relationship, but it is an important part. Obviously, the two of you were not a good match, for whatever reasons. Time to move on.

 

The guy wanted to see you naked and maybe rub one out. You eventually sent him a picture where he couldn't see a face or anything (those are really boring pictures, 99.99% of the time) and he realized he was pushing this with the wrong type for him and gave up.

Why the hell would he show this picture to anyone, and who the hell would care? I don't care if you're the fucking undead, if I'm not having sex with you why should I care, even if you ARE totally hideous and mal-formed, as you seem to think? (note that this is probably not the case, you just want to feel sorry for yourself and maybe make some of us tell you that you're pretty without even knowing this)

So....... You made normal sexual things guilty and awkward, and he ran off. That's pretty much all this thread says.

 

I agree with what you're saying. It's funny because this same guy would preach to me that no one is perfect hence he knew that i was self conscious and that he liked women with meat on them "thick women". I am actually fit and take care of myself although I am far from perfect. I actually had my breasts reduced two yrs ago because I was so self concious and he was aware of this but still preached that he had love for women of all shapes colors and sizes. But i feel like i took a chance and exposed myself and his silence has made me feel like something about me is physically wrong with me . I always think the worst first.

 

I appreciate your comment and no im not looking for anyone on here to tell me that I'm pretty ..I don't even have a picture up! but I'm a little confused by one of your statements.

How did I make a normal sexual thing awkward???

 

with friends like that who needs enemies! that guy is no friend of your,cos real friends dont do that kinda shit!he's just a stupid dickhead asshole!there is nothing wrong with you or your body.its just that your a very nice person an you cant understand them kinda mentalitys in people.cos unlike him yours is a good and decent on!.you sound like a very nice lady ta me. a good person an woman with selfrespect and dignity.so just forget about him now,cos he dont even deserve the headspace of your thoughts.there is nothing wrong with you.you have just being taken advantage of by a creep.its as simply as that.so just learn from it now an dont ever give someone like him pics of your private body again..cos he's just a perve.so chin up now , an soon the memory of all that bad stuff will go away.be happy! sadone. an heres a big huge hug for ya! :grouphug: :sunny:

 

You need to separate the pain of the rejection you're feeling from your sense of self-worth.

You took a risk sending those images so your anxiety was probably heightened and now the outcome seems to have you spiraling and turning that anxiety inward on yourself.

I know from experience that it can be hard to let go of the feeling that you've humiliated yourself, but it's important to remember that noone cares about it as much as you do. Nobody else is fixated on it. And your fixation will only serve to feed your shame and anxiety and sicken your spirit.

Just accept what happened. It's history. There's nothing wrong with you physically.