When you experienced your first crush, did you understand the significance of those feelings as the romantic-attraction couples have for each other or did the feelings scare and confuse you? Basically, what was your first reaction to your first crush, and how self-aware were you about it?
first crush was translated into love courtesy of all the hormonal changes racing around the body so very self aware but being scared or confused?, no way, excited as i remember.
first crush ever--happy terribly joyous and charged, totally oblivious to what it was that was causing it though. But kind of scared too because it was my first awareness of being a lesbian and had some confusion and adversity to face because of that--and a lot to think about. I suppose I felt some sadness/bitterness too in twinges. Acknowledging my first crush didn't just mean I had to acknowledge liking girls and therefore being different in a kinda significant way from my friends, but it also meant I had to open to the fact that I had a desire for something my parents couldn't provide for me. When were talking first crush were talking first real separation from being a child to an adult--yeah scary stuff for sure.
Wow sacrid, that's a really deep and thought provoking comment. Thanks for posting! I'd never had insight before from someone who was a lesbian or gay or bi about their first crush ever. --- My first crush was exciting, nervous, with a dash of curiousness about the said girl I was crushing on. And being a guy I guess, I remember physical beauty being the initial pull, but when I got to know the girl a bit as a friend her kind personality sealed the crush. I was like in 2nd grade at the time and this was also my first experience with the friendship zone, if you could call it that since I don't know if she was even into boys yet. But we lost contact because we went to different schools as years passed.
my first crush was on a dolphin trainer named bob. he was probably in his early 20s, and i was like 7, but i thought he was dreamy. i got back home from florida and made a collage of him and the dolphins and wrote the reasons i liked him. i wrote that i liked how he was a good person because he was kind to the dolphins, and that he had sunny blond hair and a nice smile. hilarious. i had no idea of the significance of such feelings. it wasn't until later in life, and many crushes and a handful of lovers later, that i actually felt self-aware about my feelings for another person. that terrified me. sometimes i think he could have been the one ... we'd talk about our futures together and being married and having children, and the time we spent together was always very special ... but i was terrified of those feelings and also was not ready for the one. so, this person and i never got together. over the years either tried at times, but it was always bad timing for the other. it is a journey and a struggle to be able to trust in those feelings and give in rather than running away. but a good one, i think. interesting query, monkjr.
During my first crush, I was sure that destiny and fate had brought us together for some purpose. I thought that every time. In hind sight, I realize that I was correct each time except that I would now call it my higher-self. I believe we attract people into our lives who can teach us what we need to learn - be that how to love, how to compromise, how to assert yourself when needed, how to sacrifice for another when needed, how to let go, etc. So, I think crushes are each significant and I realized that from the very start.
