What is it with this guy..no one seems to know

I'll try to make this as short as I can...

I worked with a guy for 6 months and ended my employment at the end of November. We flirt a lot, lots of eye contact, he followed me around, hopeless at making conversation but he tried at any chance he could. He never touched me though but didn't mind when I would touch his hand or arm in fact he would follow me more then.

So I left and got a long warm hug and said goodbye. I sent him a msg saying I'll miss him. He said I'll miss you too take care and best of luck in the future. I sent him back a msg the next day saying he was just a friendly co worker, for the last month I took a shine to him and I like him but it's ok I know where I stand and I won't bother him again and said to take care too. The next day/night he txt me saying that he thought I completely miss read me and he got the vibe but didn't take it further while we were working together. He said believe me you're not bothering me I think you should give me your ph number and address. (the texts where PM's through fb at this stage) I waited a day or 2 and gave him my ph number only. He text me by ph number and said thanks for your number I'll be in touch with you and see you soon.

From there on I got random txt msgs that were tepid...how are you? What did you get up to last night? I asked him to come see me couple of times, he was working or someother shit. It went on for about a month. So he knew I liked him for a month..then there was just random empty txt msgs for another month. I ended up sending him a txt about 3 weeks ago saying you're not interested.. you had an offer.. you could have been honest with me though.

He never replied and I got the impression he wasn't going to. What got me was that he never said he liked me and never said he wasn't interested but I got replies to txt msgs. I wasn't always the one to initiate them either, sometimes I didn't hear from him for 10 days or so.
...and nearly all of his msgs ended with I will come over and see you very soon x
I thought I'd have a go at really hooking him before I gave up. So I sent him a text, fairly mild, but telling him what I wanted to do to him. I got a msg back fairly quickly he said I'm not playing some stupid game with you, I've been really sick and I'm available this and that date. I told him I'm pretty busy but picked a night and time it was suitable for me.

Well he was as keen as to come over. he was planning very quickly, damn it couldn't have come at a worst time. That time of the month come early, in fact an hr before he come over. So funny but I tried to txt my friend to tell her that I had it and I'm going to have to put him off to another date..guess what? I sent it to HIM!! fml! I laughed about it he was good about it too and said that's ok..it's all good. I said he can still come over for a drink, he said it's kinda awkward now wait next week when yr ready to go ..l made contact with him a couple of days ago asking what he was up to. He said he was ill again and in bed. I said I hoped he felt better soon and left it.

I'm single and I don't want the hang up of someone that can't let go. He's a perfect candidate. I don't sleep with numerous guys so I'm selective but just want to sleep with him. I guess it looks like I'm clinging but I'm just wanting to have a really good night with him. I just don't understand..is it that he only wants his ego massaged? Does he really want to come over? It's been months why would he just drag his feet? Some say he's shy and others say he's not shy.. he's got girls on the side. Some of my friends say he's shitting himself and he's a virgin because in a very recent message he said I always thought a woman with experience wouldn't hurt..teach me a thing or two. I'm so confused..I'd love your point of view. pls help

 

it's in the wrong place

 

he sounds extremely shy and virginal to me.

 

I actually posted this on another board all I got was that he is not interested..dating or sex, he's just being polite sending texts if any guy at that age knew he had sex lined up for him he wld have Benny ard in a heartbeat and I'm scaring him

 

youve posted this exact thing like 3 times now lol

 

to the other thread..

 

and Im about to go nova.. :sunny:

 

Twice. I posted it under a different catagory that's all. I just got a reply here so I responded. It's a confusing situation so it's good to get several answers anyway

 

It's really hard to make a judgement based only on what you've posted, but 2 possibilities ring out to me.

1. He's a cool guy that's interested in you - So don't drive him away with all this "have a nice life" ... "I want your body" back and forth. This is likely what he meant by 'playing stupid games' And he wanted to hang out even though you accidentally texted him that you had your period and he knew he wasn't going to get the tail he was expecting ... And you turned him down? Because it was "awkward?"

Seriously I'm not trying to get too down on you. I just think you should spend some time with him before you decide for yourself whether he's into you and vice versa

2. He's sexy as hell, girls are all over him and he's giving you a chance - same as above except he might not be all that into you and might be seeing other people

3. I don't really get the "virgin" vibe, but I could be missing something. He might be shy and inexperienced or one of those emotional lovers that doesn't sleep with people he doesn't feel a strong connection with (it's not that uncommon, even in men)

 

I said to him he could still come over or we can go out for a few drinks, he's the one that said I'll wait till next week when yr ready to rock and roll. I didn't say it was awkward for him to come over, he did. I t would have been nice if he had of said ok I'll come over anyway... Maybe he thinks I expect him to behave like a full on porn star and I've scared him. Maybe he's just not into me. I wld have thought someone his age wld have been over in a heartbeat if he knew what he was getting

 

It's funny I was expecting someone to tell me I've been way too easy for him or that hes just not into me..

 

I misread that part

That brings his cool factor down
It's like the opposite of cool, him not wanting to chill with you because you have your period and he's not gonna get in you?! Even though you guys haven't had a chance to spend time together...

I'd lose interest in a second if I were you. He must really appeal to you.

 

Actually your answer has just pretty much smacked me in the face. He's either scared or treating me like shit! It's one extreme to the other, it wld be nice if a guy was straight with you and said he wasn't interested but yes he seems shallow, maybe he was trying to be a big man about it, he hasn't contacted me I should move on I think and yes he does/did appeal to me very much. What the he'll is wrong with me

 

Methinks "Bright Star" Is In Fact A Very "Dim Star"...:coffee:



Cheers Glen.

 

point taken Glen, without you elaberating..I'm an idiot for thinking he's just nervous and I am just a dumbass on a rope

 

And who does that shit!? Why treat women like that?

 

At Sometime In Our Lives, We All Make Fools Of Ourselves....

I Wish You Well For The Future....



Cheers Glen.

 

Speaking as one of those guys, I'd agree completely. Speaking from experience, you should know ahead of time that a guy like that tends to be reactive and emotional at times - everything's new. If he is somebody you're really interested in, go for it, but it will be hard work and if you do break his heart, it will almost assuredly get messy. Be very sure before you commit.

 

...^^this might be right.. I got a text out of nowhere saying 'you kinda made me nervous..I didn't know what you want you really want from me. I'm still interested.. I don't show it but I am. I know I don't deserve it. Id just like to know what you truly want from me..you're a really nice person so I'm sorry for treating you so badly xx.

A friend told me to tell him bluntly exactly what I wanted.. I had to just say it how it was because he's asking... this guy is very young. I would absolutely love to be his gf. He would be hard work. So I told him in a nice way casual sex..only bc I have a busy lifestyle and a lot going on atm but I don't just pick up randoms..I'm not like that, but it's all I need right now. Besides, I think I would have scared the shit out of him asking for a full on relationship...but now he's probably worried about his performance. He didn't reply after that so later I sent him a text saying 'would you like to come for dinner during the week? No pressure at all I'm not asking for anything I'll just cook for you and I'm a good cook ' He text straight back saying 'maybe..Ill see what happens, I'll check when I'm free. Thanks for the invite.
I hope I'm not being manipulated I keep thinking about what Glen said..IDK F*ck! I have the patients of a saint!

 

if all you want is casual sex tell him you'll suck his dick if he comes over right then

he probably will.