Alright... so this is my first post here on HipForums! The problem that I am having with my family is that I am the one that must initiate everything! Here are examples: My great-grandmother that raised me: she will not call me. I must call her. She keeps track of how many days have gone by that I have not called her and then when I do she will give a big guilt trip (saying things like I guess you've forgot about me, I'm no longer important in your life, etc). My paternal grandmother: never calls me. Ever. I can get a message from her on Facebook or a text on my cell phone... never a call. She constantly complains about how she doesn't see enough of me. That I need to come around more often. She also knows I want to move out of state to our nearest city: and she can't seem to fathom that I want to move an hour away from family (her whole family lives within a few minutes drive at most from each other). My father and stepmother: I just saw them for Christmas. The last time I saw them before that was in October... so almost two months had gone by where I didn't call or text... but yet they didn't call or text me either... but when I go to visit them, they complain about me not keeping in touch, that I need to come around more often, etc., etc. The paternal side of my family is very family-oriented (I'm not). They frequently have many family get togethers, big holiday celebrations, etc. Sometimes I'm not told about them 'till a week before... when my work schedule has already been made (and so I can't call out of work). Then they'll wonder why I didn't show up, where I was, etc. When I have attended these events, sometimes I will get comments like, "So, you can only come around on holidays?" Why can't these family members ever call me? or text me? Why can't they seem to initiate outings with me if they wanted to? I have the same problems with my "friends" as well... I must initiate everything, and almost no one ever initiates anything with me. Does anyone here have any idea why this is so? Any suggestions on how I might go about improving things? Also, I'd like to know how often people here keep in touch with their immediate and extended family members and what you often do or talk about with them. Thank you very kindly for taking your time to read this!
