ok ill have to explain my situation with this guy before i can ask. (ill try to make it short n sweet) ok, met a guy on a dating website. he lives in another state of Australia, i VIC him NSW (about 10hrs via car or 1, plane) we clicked right off the bat. he sent me his phone number and we texted each other constantly. He was the first to say he loved me when he rang me and we talked. i couldnt say it as i have just got out of a long term relationship, and got screwed over between my recent ex and my new guy. so i was feeling vulnerable and just didn't wanna rush it. he asked me to be his gf and i said look i just wanna take things slow. he totally understood. Ok so yesterday he was online on his dating account account and i said to him im deleting my dating account as some of one of my exs whose now deceased, were abusing me and trolling my dating account. my deceased ex physically and sexually abused me a good couple of years ago and i told my new man this. he was really sympathetic and said he was sorry for what had happened. i said to him via the chat im getting off im about to cry. logged off and he sent me a msg (and i want to know where did it go wrong from here?) him-are you ok? me-no im not. i shudnt of told u that coz i feel like an idiot him-take a deep breathe please me-this is why i dont get close coz of this bulls**t happens (im talking about the ppl bullying me) why i have multiple fake last names on fb, been to a counceler for 5 yrs...i dont no why i bother anymore him-*my name* please settle down your making this worse on your self cause ur thinkin stupid. me-im not thinking stupid, like who'd want to be with me? so sick of being used by ppl and men why i keep to myself. him-i tried to show you, you can be loved but i guess it means s**t, thanx then it went on me asking him that i asked him 4 times to be with me but i never got a reply and him saying he ran outta credit. then he said - i had no credit ______, im serious and if you choose not to believe then thats up to u. im over being hurt and f***ked around. then i replied with, i dont want to hurt u or f**k u around becoz i love u and want to be with u, thats all i want. i want to be ur gf! is that too hard to ask or say yes to?? i know u didnt have credit and im not doubting that, im just saying you never got back to me about it (which he didnt!) then...he said - you know what forget me ok, delete me off fb. i texted and texted him crying and trying to get him to reply. he deleted me off fb and the dating site. then i said to him i will prove how much i love u. i was that close to booking a fight and going up to see him to show him i am truely sorry and how much i love him. the last msg i got from him yesterday was, dont ok, im not going to be there im going to my house down the coast. i believe in astrology and such. hes an aquarius. if you leave Aqu. men alone and give em their space theyll be fine. but i truely want to know how do i get him back?? and show him im not a damaged soul and i love him more than anyone would... PLEASE.. im so desperate right now.
if you're telling us everything, i don't know what his deal is. i understand not wanting to deal with a drama queen, but that doesn't really explain his sudden turnaround out of basically nowhere. i also have no idea what VIC or NSW are.
Reread the conversation between the two of you. Do you think that maybe you were overreacting to the situation a little? Hopping on a plane doesn't prove how much you love him, considering you have not been in a long term relationship or have a lot invested in making the relationship work out. If someone I was talking to online, and even interested in, said that I would think "stalker" not true love. He was out of credits yet you kept texting him...um...do I need to point out that you were a little obsessive and overly emotional? Or did you reread the conversation and see what I am referring to? Yeah, I know...I am supposed to say he is being a dick and give you some wonderfully romantic advice about how you can get him back. Here's my advice, give him some space and when you do text him try to control your emotions. It will make you seem more mature and capable of handling a relationship. Good luck!
Have you ever met this guy in person ? I don't understand how people get such an emotional attachment to someone they met on a social website . For all you know this guy could be a total tool . I just don't get how he can want to make a couple of you two yet . And tell you he loves you . Seems a little quick to me . I agree with you it's to soon . And to be honest he sounds like an insensative ass . I mean granted no one really wants to hear to much about someones baggage , yet it's not like you bring it up over and over , I guess . Why are you so emotional and want him back so much . Do you reallyn even know this guy ? When he is ten hours away ? I have no idea what out of " credit" is , I'm guessing pre paid cell . I.d.k. But why are you sorry ? I didn't read anything so bad in what you told him . He doesn't seem to share your emotional attachment to him . But he tells you he loves you . That should give you red flags about this guy . Enough I would say to back off it . If your ex-boyfriend is deceased how is he "trolling your dating account ?
You dont want him back. You want the feelings you had when you was talking with him. It made you feel good about yourself. You should forget him. Go out more with friends and just have a good time forget relationships....they dont work!
Yes it is like a cell phone in the States. Or a Mobile phone which requires credit to use if on a pay-as-you-go plan and not pay Monthly.
Thanks for clearing that up , for us yanks Glen . I was confused on it myself . You know how we are, we sometimes forget there is a whole world out there beyond the states . At least for myself anyway . I know typical American .
Why do you want him back? He was really rude to you, and extremely selfish. "i tried to show you, you can be loved but i guess it means s**t, thanx" What the fuck's that? How loving is that ultimatum "accept my love or it's over!". Is this boy gonna run out every time you're unhappy with him? You're going through a hard time over old emotional wounds, and he's getting upset at you? Fuck him.
Life Lesson #1086 Serious conversations should NOT be had by text message Life Lesson #127 Don't turn into an emotional whirlpool until AFTER you get to know someone I doubt that you'll get him back Best not to fixate on it Get your head right first
Hey, I'm an Aquarius too, but I like to think I'm not so emotionally volatile as that...I'm pretty sure I at least give a steady build up before exploding and getting a bit verbally nasty. To me, it seems like you've both been hurt in the past and this particular incident was the catalyst that kinda set everything off. If I'm honest, it seems like you may have been putting your emotional past onto him in a way that nobody can deal with...it's like saying "I've been hurt by other people, so how can you prove that you won't hurt me too?" - I've seen this kinda thing before and in my experience it often happens after the initial click stage, and works like a buffer to geting more intimate. I think you put up your buffer, and he responded in kind. So, for what it's worth, here's my opinion: 1) Deal with your past first - if you don't, not only will every guy you click with have to deal with the same thing, but even after he's "passed" the test, you will keep bringing it up to him and will one day force a split. Chances are that there's a part of your mind that thinks it will be easier if you force a split, so you don't have to deal with the pain of him abandoning you. 2) Be honest and work out if it's HIM you want, or the feeling of being loved. Please please please be honest with yourself on this one because it's so easy to get wrong and regret later. 3a) If you decide you want him back, first accept that the final decision to get back together rests with him - it could go either way. Send him a single message to the effect of "I'm sorry that my past gets to me. I won't force you or hassle you, but you've been a good influence in my life and want dearly for that to continue - you're special to me." 3b) If you decide that it's not him you desire, but those elusive feelings of love and acceptance without judgement, send him a message to the effect of "I'm sorry for putting you in the position I did. My past carries heavy burdens for me, and as much as I have enjoyed having you in my life, I know that it will take time for me to heal, and I don't want to hurt you anymore than I already have. Thank you for everything." My opinion only - you can take it as you wish, but in either case, you must confront your past and deal with it if you ever wish to be happy again. Best of luck x
everytime i read new thread . more and more woman become the hunter and the one who insist in ''relationship'' if i can call it . girl forget him . fuck him . life is good , without sucker that can't respect you .
