I finally found out what went wrong

So, for those of you that remember my relationship saga, I finally was told kind of what went wrong.

Basically, my girlfriend told me that I am too stable. I am preparing to actually start being an adult, but she isn't ready. I have a full time job and she wants to travel and have adventures. She also just doesn't want to be committed to anyone, even though she still loves me.

The problem is that I am still madly in love. But, she doesnt want to be in a relationship. She says that she needs to be alone so she can figure herself out. She says that hopefully once she does that, we can get back together.

I mean, I was going to propose this year to her, but I am heartbroken. I think that some of this drama has to do with her parents getting a divorce. She says that there has to be someone better out there for me, but she is so perfect for me. How can I just move on and forget all the great, loving memories?

 

An all too common story... ugh, I really hate that for you, man. I know exactly how you feel. I really hope it works out for the best...

 

you don't need to forget the memories, just don't fixate on them.

 

problem with these situations is

she buggers off to find herself

and instead finds pedro

and begins a committed relationship.

 

Thanks for the replies.

The thing is that she tells me every day that she still loves me. But the thing is that she also says she can't be with me right now. She says that she wants to still see and hang out with me, but she usually only does this once a week, and I get a sort of time limit.

One of the reasons she wants to be just friends is because she is pursuing her dream and is moving to California. She thinks it isn't right to say we are together when she is far away. I can't stop her from going, it would be selfish of me to do that.

She does still have feelings for our friend, but he has made it clear that he doesn't like her like that. But, I find it sort of suspicious that he always wants to hang out with her. They went on a trip with other friends to Boston over the weekend. The other day, her and I were supposed to hang out, since we hadn't seen each other in a week. After three hours, she had to go home because she wanted to paint. I asked if I could watch and talk to her while she was working, but she wanted to be alone. Well, I found out that the guy friend came over after he got off work and the spent hours painting. Yet she doesn't get why I was so upset about that. Nothing is going on sexually, because she would have told me. She has always been overly honest with me on everything and I have never caught her in a lie.

Every night we talk and sometimes it slips into a conversation about us. I know she wants to get back with me, but she is reluctant because of the maturing she needs to do and she isn't sure how long it will be. Maybe I'm foolish, but I keep on fighting for us, because it is what I believe in.

 

Sorry - not trying to be dispassionate - but please sir - find your balls.

 

dude, shes dumb. she'll probly come back

 

I know how you feel, just forget it. There's a small chance you will get back together but if you cling onto that idea, you'll never be able to grow to your full potential.

 

:2thumbsup:

Agreed with ^
You'll spend too much time "hoping" that she may want more one moment......... if she doens't now........... she won't then either. Women can be cruel and uncruel........ the friend bit means , never again.

 

even if she came back to you

you've shared this girls feelings with another

and since her affections have been compromised

you know it will cause you pain

and eventually you'll break up again anyways.

just cut the chord.

 

You know, they say that breaking up is hard to do. However, it sounds like you guys just aren't right for each other. You sound serious and she sounds like she just does whatever the fuck she wants and doesnt take anything seriously.

Which is okay, for both of you.

You'll find out the difference between being with someone right for you and trying to make it work with someone thats wrong for you when you find the right person.

 

Yeah in all honesty , you should just let this go and move on . Find new people to date . There are to many fish in the sea to stay hung up on her . And if she wanted to be with you she would be . She knows she has you right where she wants you , drolling over and wanting her . This gives all the power to her , and she may be content to continue to dangle that carrot of "maybe" I'll be back . Empower yourself by letting it go , and find the one you were meant to be with . Besides it will never be the same even if you were back together . As she would probably do the same thing again , cause she knows she can . We have all been in this boat too , and one sided love doesn't work . Sure it hurts and sure you want to be with her , but it seems this relationship is over . And the very best way to get over one is with another , and when you find that magic one , you will look back and laugh and say I can't believe how hung up on her I was . You can't change others only yourself , and from every relationship we grow and learn . And you will always remember that dishonest people do dishonest things . Move on my man and let her go , find a new girl and start fresh.

 

So, being a doormat was not enough. You wanted to get yourself into a situation no man EVER comes out on top of.

You`re already fucking her, for crissakes. What the fuck is the difference between your current state and marriage? Alimony?

Some people are just gluttons for punishment, I guess.

 

Take off the rose colored glasses. Now.

This is called "letting you down easy" in woman-speak.

Like a lot of women...she wants everything. She wants everything and everyone, apparently.

My guess is that your "friend" is fucking her. She doesn't have time for you but has plenty for him. 2+2 man. WHAT DOES IT EQUAL?!?!?!

Let it go. Yes, it sucks and you hurt. Chalk it up as a lesson. But, LET THAT SHIT GO. Good riddance. Wipe your hands. On to the next irrational creature that only has her own self interest in mind. Repeat the process with the rest of us chumps. Because we never fucking learn.

 

it depends.

2.4 + 2.4 = 4.8

if you account for rounding up or down

it could be this - 2 + 2 = 5

life is complicated.

 

Sorry about your situation. I just read all of your threads about this girl. At the end of the day, she'll have a few months of her freedom and enjoy, then realize that being promiscuous and alone is very unsatisfying. She had someone who loved her, was understanding, and would probably bend over backwards for her. and it wasn't good enough because she wanted to fuck his friend, who probably saw her nothing more than a booty call.

Find yourself a good girl, and forget about this one.

PS, where abouts in PA are you? I live in Jersey

 

Thanks for the response. Well, she claims that she still is in love with me, but still doesn't want to be in a relationship. Our friend has made it clear that he isnt interested in her. She is leaving for California in a week, but pretty much ignores me and says she will talk or text me on her own time. I am doing my best to give her the space and time she needs.

 

you didn't answer, where in PA are you!!

 

I sent you a message, but I guess it didn't go through. I'm in central pa, near Lewisburg.

 

I say dump her. Live your life for you.