Liner?!? I barely know her!!!! What's the difference between a dead baby and a rotten apple? I don't know, I never came in a rotten apple.
I said to my mate at the fancy-dress party "Who's the fella with the condom on his face supposed to be?"-He shrugged and said "Fuck nose".
I asked Santa for something to wear and something to play with. He left me a pair of trousers with a hole in the pocket.
What is wrong with a room full of lawyers up to their chins in shit? Not enough lawyers and not enough shit!
Q: What is the difference between a black man and a picnic table? A: A picnic table can support a family of five.
After all these years,I just discovered women have an 'Off' switch that stops them talking! It's on the back of her head-just hit it with a bat and she shuts up instantly!
man holds up box.... "Do you think this is big enough?? ...For these pythons!" "Somebody call a vet....Cuz these puppies are sick!" "Do you know how to sew?? Because I Am Ripped!" This could be a whole different thread...if it isn't already... I love muscle jokes...it's funnier bc I'm a chick. I say them at work all the time. :boxing_smiley:
What should you do if your girlfriend tells you shes just been diagnosed HIV positive?.........act surprised.