Question for the ladies from a 22 yr old virgin male

Hey all. I may stick out like a sore thumb here, as I am actually a virgin at age 22. The reason for my virginity is kind of a long discussion, and not the point of this post. In short, I plan on losing it fairly soon, but I have a question.

Girls, say you are about to have sex with a 22 year old guy. Would you rather he tell you straight up that he's a virgin? Would that make things really awkward, or would you be happy that he told you before he partook in (most likely) mediocre sex?

Just to clarify, I am not a COMPLETE noob when it comes to sexual interaction. While I have never taken things so far as intercourse, I have made out with girls, as well as given and received oral sex. So, while I'm sure I won't be a stallion in bed my first time, I don't think I'll be a complete and utter let-down. Also, I am not socially awkward in any way. In fact, the only people that have the slightest clue that I'm a virgin are only the people I've told.

So, telling a girl I'm a virgin just before sex: Good idea or bad idea? Should I just go for it and hope for the best? Would it be MORE awkward if I didn't tell her and she figured it out on her own?

I know this will vary from girl to girl, and probably depends on my relationship with the girl I'm hypothetically about to have sex with, but I'm talking in a general sense, so I'm looking for general answers.

Thanks for any feedback.
Have a good one!

 

Tell her, we like to teach

 

not all of you.

But honesty never hurts.

I didn't tell the girl I lost my virginity too until afterwards. I was 19.

 

Tell her. If she's okay with it, she'll be glad you were confident enough to confide in her, and you'll feel a lot closer. If she's not okay with it, she'll be glad she didn't unknowingly take your virginity.

 

The first guy I slept with was a virgin and he told me beforehand. It was kind of nice, since I was, too. Sucked ass because we were both virgins, but hey, practice makes perfect, right? But I'm almost 100% certain the second guy I slept with was a virgin beforehand as well. He was just way too inexperienced and nervous not to be. He's never admitted that to me, but yeah...there was no way he'd ever done that before. So I think I'd rather know first, because it might have made things a little less fumbly.

 

There is a high chance she'll think its sweet.

Hell, in way it is, you've saved it up 'til her.

Yeah I think she'll go for it.

 

u r right it depends on the female.personaly i would want to know cause i don't care for fumbly sex.

 

She'll probably figure it out anyway, so u should tell her, if only to avoid the question. Btw, i don't think it's that uncommon to be a virgin at age 22...

 

I agree, tell her. It's gotta be easier as it means you have less to worry about. Mind you I don't really have any experience in this area as I'm a 48 year old virgin! But hey...things could be worse....

 

I'm not a virgin but I've told girls I was in jest. They love it

Of course, if I had actually been serious I'm not sure what their reactions would have been ....

Haha there was a girl I had sex with last year that must have thought I was because it was awkwardly positioned in a car and it was almost impossible!

 

Trust me she will know even if you don't tell her, or she will suspect it. Don't feel bad, I didn't lose my V card til I was 23, thought it would never happen, now i'm in a commited relationship with a sex fiend and we do it like rabbits. Hopefully if you are at the point with a girl where you are going to have sex with her then there is enough communication and trust that you telling her you're a virgin is not only not a problem but is the normal thing to do. You know, "Hey, by the way, this is my first time." No big deal, she might really dig it.

 

If I were the girl, I would like to know. Tell her, she'll appreciate your honesty, and she'll be happy to teach you

 

I think it's a good idea for you to tell her. If you are getting intimately sexual with someone, it's good for them to know you and you both should know what each other likes and desires as well.
It's nothing to be ashamed of and it doesn't mean you won't be good in bed.
As with anything that is new, you learn as you go along.
Your partner should be understanding.

 

Thanks for all of your responses so far. I'm glad to see that this is a very mature and understanding forum.

I was very unsure about this subject before, but now I see that the overwhelming majority agrees that someone like me should let the girl know.

However, don't you guys think I might scare her a little and make her think I'll get too attached to her? That's probably my main concern about telling her I'm a virgin. I don't want to make it seem like I've been waiting my whole life for the PERFECT girl that I'm going to spend my life with, and having sex with her would mean I want to be together forever. I feel like that would be rather off-putting.

At the same time, I don't want her to feel like I don't care at all.

Honestly, I feel like I know the answer to this. I'm probably over-thinking things (which is part of the reason why I haven't had sex yet), and I should probably just go with the flow and do what feels right in the moment. I think that as long as I'm casual in me telling her I'm a virgin, it will ease her of any concerns that I'd be too clingy after having sex. Either way, advice from experienced people could never hurt, so I really appreciate any feedback.

By the way, I also don't think it's bad in any way to be a virgin at 22 and I'm not trying to lose my virginity because I think it's "freakish" or anything. Planning to lose it in the near future is a personal choice of mine and I mean no disrespect to anyone who is still a virgin or lost their virginity at an older age.

Thanks again.

 

yeah if u tell her u've been waiting to find the perfect girl and u feel it's a huge commitment, that could be a little scary for her. But u don't have to say that ! Just tell her u never had the opportunity, nothing more.

 

the main thing that you have to worry about by far is just your awkwardness and anxiety about being a virgin

your dick doesn't magically transform once it's been inside a pussy. you don't transform after having had sex the first time. there's way too much attention paid to being/not being a virgin

stop worrying so much about being a virgin, don't worry so much about performance. it's good to try to develop skill in bed, but getting rid of all the fear that you have and just trying to enjoy your experience is the number one thing you can do to make things better

you're not a virgin, you've had sex, just not vaginal sex. count yourself a non-virgin.

find a nice girl that you like and that likes you. make it slow and loving. add some foreplay. hug. enjoy yourself. relax. breath. breathing can be a good thing, when we tense up, we tend to forget to take deep relaxed breathes. breathing can also be very sensual

you don't need to tell a girl that you're a virgin. you also don't need to lie about it if she asks. I would suggest not saying anything about it just because it seems that you are so wound-up about it

using a rubber is probably a good idea. maybe practice putting one on a few times.

otherwise, don't worry so much. hopefully, a happy sex life will soon be before you.

:sunny:

 

oh, and also, maybe don't ejaculate too frequently.

not ejaculating frequently can keep your sex drive high, which makes it easier to connect

 

and now as a 50 year old (soon to be 51) virgin, I'd still agree with what I stated.

 

I would respect a guy for telling me. I think it would help you relax and she could teach you things rather than you having to awkwardly ask!

 

If you tell her...won't she think "why me"?

If you've waited this long...why not wait until you are in love? Because you have had sex...just not intercourse....save that for the gal you feel may be your mate.