I just want to start this, my final thread ever to be posted on this forum, with this: I Love You All. And, as a preliminary to this, the telling of my personal revelation, I want to make clear where I was when it was recieved. At work. In a factory that makes computer printing paper. Dank Hole. The bathroom, which you will hear of smelling of an incense, usually just smells like shit. Literally. The nasty diarrhea of forty-something factory worker's with junk diets. Really. I can't stress that enough. You will soon understand why. Also, I am bid to leave the way of communication open, and welcome anyone to contact me anytime at bloodybodhisattva@yahoo.com . Also, for any smarmy sectarians, it has been given upon me to start it all with this quote: "Thank God I'm an Atheist!" -Aliester Crowley This is written verbatim from my notebook, transcribed through blurry vision as it occured, in its intervsals: 12-17-2004 I Know Now that ever on must I aspire; On and ever On throughout all that is Eternity. And I foresee that in this phase I have a purpose, And I implore the Divine Spirit, to grant me With the Courage and Resolve to persevere, unto The End with the utmost striving of mine Heart. So Mote It Be! ....After this was written on the fly, with tears in my eyes, I stepped into the bathroom and smelled therein a certain incense sacred to me. And I searched for the source of that scent, but could not find it, and my tears erupted afresh, whence I was compelled to utter: O' Adonai, I aspire to thee! Blessed Be! Blessed Be! And then the door opened, and in walked one of my co-workers. The scent disappeared instantaneously, and I made my exit, wiping still tears from my eyes as more gushed anew therefrom. Later: Again, into the bathroom I went to relieve my bladder, and that smell! That scent! Storax? Galbanum? Regardless, it again dissipated instantly upon entry of another. And unto me, at a time shortly later: "A time of Great Trial cometh upon thee, my son, wherein you shall make no error, so long as you aspire ever to the Most High." The Truth, to me, is something of both Ineffable Beauty and Unsurmountable Horror. I would have no one to even imagine it, lest they come upon it of their own volition. Blessed Be to thee, O' Adonai, that ye may guide me through these dark times and help me to bear a Fire that burns bright enough that all others who deserve to come through this tunnel of Death may follow. None shall be unscathed, but all shall benefit from the struggle. But O' how I lament that it must again come to this, atrocity and abomination. Damned be those that clog and stifle thy Glory with their idolatrous shit, but by no act of mine. It is of their own accord that they will be brought to drown and choke and die their lowly deaths in the Nephesh, in the Qliphotic Mire of their own fear phantasms and neuroses. I have taken what can be salvaged from this mess, that with the very substance of it I may transform the All at thy bidding. But O' so much more than I had hoped must now fall back into that great swamp. The Time Of The Transcension has come. O' Secret Sacred Flame, Holy Guardian Angel of my most ardently exalted Self, bear me through; Absolve me, that I may become One, in Zero. So; I lay claim to this fact of Nature: each and every One of us has a Divine Purpose. If we but aspire to it, if we but seek it, than it Will Be, Fulfilled. It is a Travesty and Abomination against Nature that sectarian religion, (ab)using the very methods and devices employed by the True Seekers, have managed throughout Antiquity to thwart this process, under the pretense of being its intermediary. YOU NEED NO INTERMEDIARY! YOU ARE THE WAY! No less or more was uttered from the lips of any and every Holy One-- Buddhas and Krishnas and Christs alike-- and never have their self-appointed interpreters failed to bastardize and profane that message to such a degree that it defeats its own purpose. I will not patronize you by stating that we are in grave danger. We are but shadows. husks, shells of that Divine Light of Eternity, that Ancient of Days, that Holy of Holies, and yet each one of us is, contained withing our Selves, is this very Light. So there is no real danger, as far as Existance Goes. It will Go On Existing. It will take new forms, contrive new Being to Entertain It Self. But I will say this, to each and every One that Knows and Loves another One sincerely, for it is of the gravest importance, should you wish in your Heart of Hearts to go on Loving that One: The World Is What You Make It. eMBeMLaHV!
thanks for your msg osiris, ill miss seeing your poetry posted, your thoughts and messages... i think your on a fantastic path and hope to still communicate occassionally. xxx
All this came from the smell of shit in the factory bathroom? Well, hey man, whatever it takes to break through, haha. I'll miss you as well, but go and be where what and who you must. Peace~
