I am wondering if anyone here has ever adopted? My fiance and I have a wonderful 3 year old son. We are stable and happy and doing quite ok financially, but I have suffered 2 miscarriages and can't seem to have the second child we so badly want. I have always considered adoption for 'later', but now that I feel the clock is ticking and I desperately want a second child to hold and love more than myself (it's a great feeling) I just suddenly realize we are not prepared for adoption and there seems to be no other way for me to have a second child. I have no idea what to do. My heart is so broken. I am thrilled with the wonderful boy we have, but there is a big hole where our next child should be. Does anybody have any experience/suggestions on this? It's gotten really serious... I freak out other moms by tearing up when they show me their babies.
I may know a little about this, we've adopted 2 girls. Brought them home from the hospital after they were born. We went through the Open Adoption process, you have to fill out a bazillion pages of paperwork. The Birthparents then take this mound of paperwork from several adoptive parents and choose who they want to adopt there baby. This is the way to go, you get to know the birthparents and their familys. Their backqround and medical histories. This can be a lifesaver in the future if the kids get sick. This is who we went through. They can explain it much better than I can. https://www.cfsnwmi.org/programs/adoption/
We were foster parents for a number of years and fostered over 30 kids during that time, mainly babies waiting for adoption placement. The last 4 kids we fostered we adopted. They were all crack babies, considered "special needs" and not the same race as us, we are white, they are black. No regrets, many years of joy later (over 20 years) and they are almost all grown. Try fostering. There is always a need for foster parents and it gives you a chance to play with the babies. Yes, you do bond with them and yes, it is painful when they leave but in our case, they were being adopted out so the parting is bittersweet. Oh, I was adopted also. 5 days old when my mom and dad adopted me. I have never had a desire to track down my birth parents, the people that raised me are my mom and dad, no reason to search any further.
