Okay. So the other day i was smoking some sativa herb, with a few of my buddies. We usually smoke a few times a week, so it's not like im that new. But I had a really bad high. I began thinking way to hard on everything about life. I began thinking about the world in general. And then i thought about death. It's coming. To every single person every born. Death os just one of the side effects of life. And it's going to happen. It just doesnt sound real. Everyone i know and love, will all one day be die. I've never had to deal with the loss of a lvoed one before, and im 20 years old already. I'm really scared now that i think about it. I think im having some sort of panic attack. Last night i felt so uncomforable in my body, and really contemplating whats going on tin the world. And it just freaks me out, because theres no way around it. I feel like my anxiety levels hve just shot through the roofs last night. I was just so scared/paranoid and just really low. But now i have all those realizations in the back of my head from last night. I love thinking, but i hate thinking about certain subjects that just really get me down like that I really also want to try some other substances with real trips. I have taken shrroms before like 5 or 6 at once, but those also, put me in a really low state, and i felt like all the dudes around me were out to get me or something I really want to try acid, just once atleast, to understand what it is, and open a nother section of my concious mind up. But my question is do you think i could handle it? (Alot of typos i know, but i dont feel like fixing them really)
If your mind is prone to going those places, acid may not be a good choice. On the other hand it could teach you to not fear that which is inevitable, death. If I were you (which I'm not) I would wait until you have grown some more... (No, I didn't just call you a kid)
I say, Find your Center. meditate, not medicate. Deal with it in this reality first. We all deal with this. Most ignore it all of their lives. That's the natural cycle of life. When you are real old and real tired you will probably want to go on. I feel that my soul is forever. Always was. Always will be. As the Hindi believe, you are in a cycle of forever. We are from the very long other. We only drop in here for a very short while, that we call life. We're not to remember the real before this. It is blocked in order to give us some kind of fresh start. For learning. Then we all go back to are real state of being. Our Forever. This life is just stopping on the road at a gas station to take a piss. Then you're back in the car on back to what you were doing in the first place. On the other hand, some people believe nothing. That simply leave us with, Zap, nothing. Like you turn off a light switch. Blank. nonexistence. Why would anybody start to worry about that? I'm just trying to help out. Acid is like dreaming out loud, but 100 power magnification. Don't do it. If you're bumming. Then it will become and 8 hour long unstoppable nightmare at 100 power magnification. Were you looking forward to something like that? On purpose? Regardless. Worry never fixes anything and always makes everything worse. So straighten the fuck up.
My ex was a miracle when it came to acid. We did the math. More than one million doses. (helped along by two occasions of swallowing his inventory on tour) But salvia wouldn't open up for him. DMT, no problem. RCs, no problem. I, on the other hand, did better with plants, typically. I was fine on Johnson's Baby Training Acid (TM), which was MDA or MDMA, depending on my luck. Acid was too... Aggressive. It stripped away masks I still needed. A glimpse would have been just fine. Acid made depression worse, although I did get a day of manic beforehand. I always felt raw in a bad way, and abused way, after LSD. Others are great with it. But it must be respected, and you should do some personal work. I LOVE Scorpio Kenny's comment: meditate, don't medicate. I have nothing against the Prankster method, but in your case, if you do experiment, have a very experienced guide who has been in good and bad trips, control your set and setting in the Leary method. I'd fast for most of the day, only drinking juice or water, and I'd have a pitcher of fruit juice for the night. A second pitcher of iced water was usually available. In cold months I might skip it. Self care counts. A guide or just a non tripping, or very lightly tripping buddy is a fine idea.
Yep, thats life. Took you 20 years to realize that everything alive will be dead really soon? I think its beautiful, and nothing to feel bad about. It sounds like you are having bad experiences, with mushrooms too. You probably have a general anxiety thing, try tripping alone. Also, sativa strains give me anxiety too. Its normal. Ive had to experience people close to my dying. Death dont, have no mercy.
Beware of internet diagnoses ... nevertheless, as you said, maybe a panic attack or maybe as Prone suggests, GAD - neither of which is a small thing. Or maybe you're feeling better already. Confronting the reality of mortality is a big deal - worth a few days of down. Now is probably not a good time for a strong psychedelic (lol, understatement). I have >60 years, so am likely pretty close to death. It's not a beautiful thing to me; it just is. Life is sweet and I feel sad about leaving it - and my wife leaving it. But I've had brushes with death several times in the past several years and I'm certain I'll do it well (assuming pain, etc. is managed).
The beauty I see doesnt come from death itself, even though that can be very beautiful, but from life, and how it is a gesture until the day you die. Theres something very beautiful about this.
Each of us contains a being that doesnt die, and a being that does die. Ram dass says it all. Be here now. Let go of the past, dont anticipate the future. Live right now, in this moment. Death is inevitable yes, but you only truly leave if you want to, and I'm pretty certain you'll be back on the journey, trying to remember what society makes you forget. Death only has to be a negative thing if you let it be, don't anticipate it, dont fear it, it is beautiful as well. You have feared and anticipated, now let it go, breathe, live right now, no looking forwards or backwards, use and enjoy what you have right now.
Death is unreal That's the way I feel There's more to be revealed Lovers and friends meet again and again On the dear old, on the dear old On the dear old battlefield I will see my memory Lightly let me go I know that we will always be But time passed fast and slow Age long, cradle song Almost had me sleeping for good If not for the plan of the magic man Who finally helped me out of the wood (Robin Williamson) My belief is somewhere along the lines of death is real, death is unreal, death is real and unreal, death is neither real nor unreal. (adaptation of The Buddha's words) See that mountain in the upper left quadrant of my sig photo? I'll be on the other side of that big old rock in ~40 days - and higher than the photo (12,000+').
Thismoment, that is very true! The part about lovers and friends meeting again. My partner and I knew eachother before we had ever spoken, just one look at eachother and we were instantly connected, reunited even! It is a beautiful thing! I love that although we know eachother, we get to re-know eachother again, both two very old souls that had been waiting to be brought back together.
He will be back! He is obviously going through a lot right now, realisation is like a major injury to modern life. He will be back
I always fall back on this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iMUiwTubYu0"]Bill Hicks - It's Just A Ride - YouTube Stay Brown, Rev J
LSD allows your conscious mind to see what your subconscious mind is thinking. As long as you can except what your subconscious is thinking, you'll be fine.
"I believe that creative imagination rules the universe. I believe in the beauty of first love and the eternal power of all love. I believe in dreams and dreamers, being one myself. I believe in the power of modern medicine and the wisdom of ancient medicine as well. I believe in the power of laughter and the beauty of a good joke." Willie Nelson We were talking about old Willie just yesterday. Almost everyone in Texas loves or at least thinks well of Willie.
I'm fine. Just been chllin a bunch, and the whole power outage in the north east left me with no internet for a over a week. And i just been super busy, got i new job at walmart that i hate, it sucks the sould out of my life forrce. But physicaly, im all good. thanks for worrying man
I think this kind of suits this thread.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bX8D0yU0pMc&list=PL3553168402165F19&index=3&feature=plpp_video"]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bX8D0yU0pMc&list=PL3553168402165F19&index=3&feature=plpp_video
