my husband and i have been 2gether for 10 yrs and married 4 of the 10 we have 2 kids 6 and 4 since i'v had them i have felt like a single mom with 3 kids the so called husband can't be bothered to do anything around the house like pick up after himself and put stuff in the dishwasher the list goes on other than that i feel like he couldn't care less for me like i'm the babysitter, he comes home and he will ignore me, has a fishing tournament every weekend so i get left with the boys and if i ask to get time to myself and have to leave the boys with him he gets all pissed off with me and we just don't talk anymore i am so confused not sure what to do anymore would love some advice peace hippychick
what?no phone numbers or links? pffft....your husband is neglecting you...leave him...or die unhappy and miserable....fucking marriage counselling only works when both parties want it to work...in which case it would already be working and you wouldnt need a counselor....it is partly your fault for letting it happen where? in canada,,,i kinda got a thing for deadlocks
do you think stay at home moms dont ''work''...dude i hope thats not what you meant...but it kinda looks like you did....she likely stays at home and has a party everyday while her dude is at work,right?and she should have more patience? please explain,i cant wait to hear it
i am a full time mom that only gets paid once a month of $250 and thats from the government, if i were to leave him the kids would be coming with me and i would need a place to go and a job to support us
no. often by the time a couple goes to counseling, their relationship is so messed up that it can't be salvaged. other times couples don't even get to that stage because one or both parties don't give a shit. however, it's possible that her husband wants to fix things and is capable of doing so. this is where counseling could help. the situation doesn't look good though. seeing a counselor unilaterally might give her a plan for how to manage ending the relationship OP, I don't know how divorce/child support works in canada, but I think that you might be able to get some money from him if you divorced. hopefully though there is a way that you can keep the marriage together however it works out, hope things work out well
First; type like an adult. Second; set your husband down sometime to have a serious talk. Hopefully, you can get the kids a sitter and be sitting in a nice serious way, as close to the door (or some room he typically goes to after work), clearly ready for something big. If not; get as close as you can to that. You want to throw him off for a second; get him out of his normal way of thinking, maybe even make him a little nervous. Tell him you want him to hear you out, ask him not to interrupt, then tell him shit's gotta change. Tell him everything you have problems with, all the bad stuff; be calm, be direct, be authoritative. If you want you can talk about counseling; if not, just focus on what he's doing wrong and how he could help out better. Since you don't work he may feel like there is nothing wrong with this arrangement; he may argue that point. Be prepared for it. Remind him that you didn't get in this situation alone, but you feel like you're alone now. Tell him you need help. As the discussion goes on, appeal more to his emotions; talk about how things were. But here's an important part; once you are done, let him talk. Listen to what he has to say. You guys need to work together to compromise. If not for yourselves, for the children. You may find him to have similar emotions. Do whatever you can to avoid starting a fight; make sure he knows that isn't what you're looking for; and of course, steer the conversation away from it and calm him down if there are any problems. Good luck, stay strong.
ok ok...you win again my arch nemesis to the counselor we go.......if we were friends in real life i would probably punch you in the arm alot
The problem with counseling is often that a couple goes into it seeking help for their relationship, while something underneath is not being addressed. The fact she said he ignores her and gets mad when she asks for help, makes me think there's a possibility there could be emotional manipulation going on...in which case counseling for them both will include her still trying to work things out and him still trying to manipulate. I'm not saying for sure that's what it is, but if that is the case and they go into counseling that could make things worse for her.
