I love him but fuck him

Say what you will of me. I don't give a fuck. What I like about myself is the fact that I'm me, don't care what people say. or think. A loyal friend is worth more to me than a plethora of acquaintances. so I would care more what my best friend thought of me, a loyal friend, before I cared what anybody else thought. thinking bout my so-called friends.
I had my heart broken. Sometimes I feel like getting fucked up beyond belief until I die, other times I'm totally content. the person who broke my heart is still my friend, my homie. I'm grateful for that. when I'm feeling negative I feel like getting high cuz he fucked me over.
Are we even? depends who you ask. I don't dislike him, I love him. Don't need that bad karma.
I love him but fuck him. Double meaning there.

 

Okay, so if you don't care what anyone thinks; why don't you memorize everything you just said and SHOUT it to people going into walmart.

I mean, is there even a need for anyone to reply? since you don't care what we think anyway?

 

I could do the Wal-mart thing. anyday. there just wouldn't be a point.
there is no need for people to reply to any of my posts, but I like to read and I enjoy hearing the interesting responses.
the only thing I would worry about with the wal-mart shout out is getting arrested

 

I was sort of joking cause most of the post till the last two lines was saying "I don't care what anyone thinks." So I'm like "Okay, well obviously she doesn't care what I think."

But now, I'm thinking you do care a little bit what people think. Cause you just said

 

I guess I care. it's interesting. I like psychology. I just don't get bothered by people who think negatively of me. that's a better way to put it.

 

Yeah, well I'm sorry you're going through a hard time. Sometimes if there's still emotions involved, it makes a friendship very difficult. I would suggest you give yourself time to get over him, before continuing your friendship.

 

What do you mean by the "Walmart thing"??

 

there's no way. we have been inseparable for two years. we broke up a few times. but we never stay away from each other for long. I better get it right this time.

 

memorizing what I said in the OP and yelling it loud at Wal-Mart

 

Have you considered Springer?

 

sounds fun. would I get paid?

 

sorry to hear that this happened, serena.

please don't get wasted to deal with your heartache. using drugs or alcohol to deal with emotional issues is not healthy.

instead, butt-fuck him

do you want to explain what happened?

 

well he and I had decided to stop drinking hard liquor. we were doing real good. but then one day his friend invited us over to drink. we did. I passed out for a while, and I was coming to he was telling this other woman that his dream was to live in the woods alone. okay fine, I knew that in a way. Chick said "then why are you with her?" in a very condescending manner. so I just got right up and left and went back to our apartment. he came back an hour later and I ended our relationship. we had an argument and both of us came out with some sick insults, pissing each other off. I hit him and he left and stayed gone until five the next evening. I was freaking out. my world came crashing down. he and I both went for a walk to cool off, but we were living in a small town pop 450 and the cops saw us walking around looking upset. I went back to the apartment and a couple minutes after I got there I heard a knock at the door. It was the cops. he must have thought I called them so he told them I hit him. I went to jail. well here is the icing on the cake: he got a permanent restraining order. but we made peace and decided to be friends and fuck buddies and broke the restraining order. he said he did it to make his family happy. but we can't live together and I have never been away from him this long. he talked to his ex-girlfriend and now I know I was only ever his second best girl. I feel like the longer he is away from me, he will forget about me. he doesn't need me like I need him. I don't want to drift apart. he was the best. I just think he will forget about me and slowly lose touch with me since we are not together everyday like we were. it has been three weeks. he always said I was his best friend but what if we can't be best friends anymore? we live an hour away from each other.

 

Wow.

 

:iagree:

 

Yeah lol, I feel I need a restraining order just reading that

 

If your well being depends on the answer to that question if feel sorry for you. Don't put yourself in a codependent position where you need someone for happiness. That's a recipe for disaster.

I'd try to address why I need someone for happiness and work toward being ok with life on my own-- being ok in my own skin on my own; then you will be in a healthier position for a boyfriend relationship if you so choose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gINtHqwjr2M"]Ingrid Michaelson "Be OK" (Photage Version) - YouTube

 

You both are just young and ignorant. I say young because you're acting like children. I say ignorant because you apparently don't know how nice it is to be in a sensible,giving,loving relationship. You'll probably grow out of this ,given some time. And what outthere said.^

 

fuck him indeed

 

You sound like one of those psycho-exes that people tell stories about later in life.

Don't be one of those. Walk away from this.