Consideration of others

How do you find out if people are genuinely ok with your nudity? If I ask they tend to say it's ok but show obvious signs of being uncomfortable, they just didn't want to be honest and say that they'd rather I kept my clothes on.

 

I guess this depends on a whole lot of parameters, so probably there will be no ever-fitting skill to find out the acceptance in advance. So probably there always will be a need to have the right “antennas” in the individual situation.

I think a lot depends on the setting too. For example I do have some friends who feel fine when I go naked on the beach or at the lake, or even in their garden, and maybe even share nudity in this settings. But some of them wouldn’t feel fine to have me lounging naked on their sofa or to work on a scripting with me while I’m nude. So in these cases you have to decide whether you push through your thing or make some consideration of their inhibitions and attitudes.

Just recently we had an appointment with another couple for lunch in town. As my friend was delayed when they came by to pick us up I asked them to come in to have a coffee meanwhile. I thought that it shouldn’t be a problem that I wasn’t clothed yet, as we were nude at the lake and in the sauna together several times before. But in this setting they seemed to feel not 100% comfortable. Maybe also because I was alone. They didn’t say anything, I just felt it. So after finishing my task at the espresso machine I askred them for some minutes and put my clothes on - and the situation was more unwound then. Of course I could have insisted to go naked in my own flat as long as I want or make them feel to be narrow minded etc., but why? We were going to have a nice night out together, so why make the beginning uncomfortable for them?

Maybe the guys you ask want to show that they are open minded and relaxed when they answer. So this is a “head” thing. But everyone of us carries a bundle of restrictions, “rules” and inhibitions she/he did acquire during lifetime – no matter if you want to make them valid in a certain situation, they are there inside you. So this is the “gut” thing.

Take care!

 

The thing is I kinda enjoy making people uncomfortable. But it very much depends on the person. Let me explain:
When I was 14 I stayed at a friend's house. When shower time came he showed me to the bathroom. I went in and was surprised to find he followed me and started to shower. Although I was uncomfortable I didn't voice my objection, wanting instead to go with it and pretend it was cool. I found myself getting more and more excited knowing it would soon be time for my shower and I thought it best to follow my friend's lead and undress and shower in front of him as nonchalantly as possible. I did just that and the thrill I felt is something I've never quite been able to equal since then.
That was when I first considered I might be a nudist and I have my friend to thank. Had he asked me if I was comfortable I might have said no. It was only from being forced into a situation that I wouldn't have chosen that my true feelings were revealed.
Now I hope you see where I'm coming from and this is the reason I like to put people in awkward situations: to see what results from it. The difficulty is knowing the difference between good and bad awkwardness if that makes sense.

 

You're absolutely right and therein lies the difficulty: figuring out who will be offended and for whom it might just unlock something within them that they enjoy like it did for me.

 

Right on, nudony! Finally someone saying there is exhibitionism in nudity! It doesn't have to be sexual but certainly a "kick"!

 

I see. You don’t go naked because you just feel fine by yourself this way, but because it makes you feel good getting the reactions of the others around. I guess this isn’t called nudism, but exhibitionism ;-)

I can’t imagine exposing naked if I think the others around feel bad with, at least I try to avoid this. In the situations I go naked and the others don’t I prefer to know that they feel fine with, or that they enjoy. Of course you can’t check it out always before, but I think this is my base attitude of nudity.

 

when can you do that?

 

fra amici, di solito.

 

i think he was asking when are you with your friends and you feel fine to get naked while they are sitting around clothed

 

yes, thats what I meant...seems quite a strange situation!

 

Hi guys, maybe i was a bit taciturn, sorry.

So some explanation for you. Being the only one naked among clothed friends is only one version of whole a lot of possibilities: all naked - some naked - only one naked - all clothed. Maybe i can give an example: For my friends it's not a secret that i often stay naked at home. So if some come to me and i know they feel ok seeing me naked, i usually stay naked if i feel like. Of course they are free to get rid of their rags too. Some do, some don't, just as they like. So it may happen that i spend an evening with friends being the only bare one. Very simple, isn't it. Same if i stay with friends at their home etc. No big deal, just a matter of open minded friendship and being natural. Another example, I sometimes go hiking with two (male) friends who are open if I want to go nude, but don’t like to go bare themselves (tried it, but it didn’t tell them so much). Though one of them went naked a big stretch at our recent hike, until then I usually was the sole nudie with them.

Understandable so far? Thanks.

 

yeah you could have just said "at home'' and it would have made perfect sense

 

thank you for the tutoring.

 

thanks for the overclarification

 

Dear Friends;

The question is: why are they uncomfortable?
- would like to be naked, too, but are to ashamed to do so,
- think that you are immoral or committing a sin: explain, why there is no sin at all!
- naked seems to be to intimate for them: behave like a true gentleman, even when naked, they will gain more confidence with you their discomfort will disappear gradually!

Greetings: Toivo

 

I think everyone is free to be naked, or not...as they feel better.
If pixy feel comfortable this way and her friends too, there is no problem, I think.
Nudity is an issue for most people...

 

i am comfy being naked i am not a full nudsit but i sleep naked and walk around house naked i am comfy skinny dipping with close friends etc that kinda thing.

 

It depends on the place and the people. On a beach designated as nude or clothes optional, or in a sauna in many parts of Europe, not an issue. In a hotel sauna, I try to make a judgement as to whether or not it will be OK. I have put a towel around me thinking it will offend not to, and had others do the same, when both of us are OK with nudity.

 

in my house i am often nude if people are over i will get dressed of course. if we have friends that spend the night if i know they are ok with nudity then if i am sleeping naked and get up to get some coffee i stay nude vs getting something on. that kinda thing

 

In my own space, I live by my own rules... but I don't want to deliberately isolate myself from others.

So when I am asking a new friend to come and hang out with me in my flat, it's time to, if I haven't already, explain that I am a nudist and I prefer to be naked when I am at home, and would that make them uncomfortable, because if that's the case, then I will happily be dressed... that's served me well for several years now, most of my friends are perfectly accepting of the fact that I will be naked when they call and it is totally normal to them.

There are some that I have chosen to stay dressed around and some that have respectfully stated they weren't comfortable with me being undressed, either from the get-go or because they tried to accept it and it was too far outside their comfort zone - and because they are my friends and I value them, I have compromised and chosen to cover my nakedness when in their company... but if they don't say anything I reserve my right to assume they are okay with it!

Aside from those friends, the only people I will always wear clothes around when they call on me are my landlord (because I don't want a man with a key to my flat to know that I am usually naked here), anyone here to fix the boiler/check the plumbing/whatever, and my grandparents (because they haven't approved of my nudist lifestyle on the rare occasions it's been mentioned to them).

Outside my flat, I don't believe I have an automatic right to force my beliefs about nudity on others by remaining naked in front of them. My neighbours are tolerant enough that I can get away with going and getting my post from downstairs in the nude sometimes, but I don't want to make them feel awkward by pushing it further than I need to (I have one neighbour who is happy to stand and chat in the hall with me whatever I'm wearing but I would never assume they were all like that).

If I'm going further than the downstairs hall, I'm wearing clothes.

In the big wide world I've found places where I have felt pretty okay about taking my clothes off, but always knowing that I don't have an automatic right to do this and that I might have to put them back on if confrontation is the alternative, because I don't like confrontation.