This might be a long post. But I'm in need of some direction. I don't necessarily consider myself an empath, but I FEEL things. I FEEL messages and symbols rather than see them. Although I do get images, they are far and few between. When I watch the news, or I talk to someone about something going on that is negative, I harbor that negative energy. I don't know why...its like I can feel the bad in the world when I turn the news on, or I hear of something happening. I've always been able to feel people...who they are, the good and the bad aspects of them, but lately, when I feel the bad, it doesn't leave. I feel all of the bad in the world right now and I can't find my way out of it. I can't rid myself of the negative energy that passes through me. Although most of the negative feelings go away, some of it sticks around and its piling up inside of me. When I get angry with someone or I am hurt by someone-the feeling passes but parts of the energy remain. This has only been happening recently-in the last year or so-since I started really pursuing my intuitive journey. A lot of the energy in the past, I could rid myself of. I'd recognize it, think about it, and let it go. But I can't do that anymore. Some people say depression...it could very well be. Or the hormonal disorder I was diagnosed with last year. But it is affecting me on a spiritual level, which is why I feel it is an intuitive curse going through me right now. I'm calling it "my demon." And some of the things I feel in readings really bother me...or messages I receive. I don't tell people about them in case I am wrong or tainting it with my own emotion, but typically, I end up being right and it hurts me to know the information at times. I am feeling a friend's marriage falling apart lately. I found out they aren't doing well. it bothers me to know the outcome. If anyone can help me...give me some paths to cleanse my energy. I don't know if I should see someone about it or do it myself. I feel like there is a lot going on in my psyche and I have no way of managing the energy it holds in. Also, another thing that is bothering me is how tired I get when I do a reading or have a moment of psychic clarity. Are there any solutions for this? Or any ways to make it less straining on me? I feel panicked when my guard is down and I go out. I did a reading this morning and I have to go out to dinner tonight and I feel drained on a psychic level and I don't like feeling like that in public.
What do I know - I have a demon too. But I know you need detachment and inner peace. So...one idea - something that helps me sometimes - is to read Zen stories. Here's where you can find them. They tend to put a better perspective on things. I have read these over and over. You can also buy the book if you like the stories enough. http://www.101zenstories.com/ A spiritual perspective helps - to realize that all the hell we go through, the disappointments, the pain, broken relationships, illness - all of it is part of an unimaginably huge cosmic/spiritual tapestry. All of it is for reasons. And if you imagine that this life is all there is for us, then you lose sight of the bigger picture. Kinda like in this particular story: http://www.101zenstories.com/index.php?story=56 No coming, and no going. Think about that...
You have many feelings. You can tap in to any of those feelings at any time. The only thing missing when negativity just won't go away, is appreciation. When you notice your feeling of negativity, realize it has nothing to teach you and nothing you want. Deny it has any influence over you, safely, because its produce is toxic. Choose again, something you enjoy.
I've been going through something similar for the last 5-6 years... Still can't get out of it. Sometimes it's not quite as easy as thedope makes it out to be. He's right, it's just not that easy to throw that switch and choose again. It becomes to overwhelming to make that choice...
I know of a way to learn to throw that switch...cuz I've been learning. Not altogether there yet, but lately I've been kinda surprised at what I'm doing inside my head that I never thought I'd be doing. The thing is, the way it worked for me was to have a few people put me through hell for a very long time. Not just hell...it takes some inner support work at the right times too. Anyway I got to do this because I asked to be guided to divine union with the divine, and this stuff started happening to me immediately afterward and hasn't let up since. Not that I would wish this on anyone...it's just that apparently my spirit guide Deanna and her ilk actually know what they're doing.
People who live in a cave have trouble at first adjusting to light with their dark adjusted eyes. It always takes some effort to move and the longer you sit, the more effort it takes to get started. Which is more likely to produce positive results, a seeming or a rightness? Just trying to suggest that the truth sets us free and one of those is fear is a liar.
You say you have a hormonal disorder. Can I ask what that is? Sometimes physical ailments can affect our whole being. Body mind and spirit. Get checked out physically and go from there.
I have poly cystic ovarian syndrome. and I know its really affecting my moods and the way I feel, so I don't doubt its a huge contributing factor. And it isn't as easy as some may think to just pull myself out of it. All of these feelings racing through me at any given moment is difficult. I'm mentally exhausted most days. But I thank you all for your input. I'm hoping to see a doctor soon to get the hormones under control before finally getting my mind in control. I will read some of those stories, zen...I think that they will be a big help, reading something more pure than what I read on the news these days!
Given those descriptions I should think so. You say it isn't as easy as some may think, exactly how hard is it?
I recommend reading the Book "A New Earth" by Eckhart Tolle. Black Tourmaline also! This stone protects you against negative energy. <3 Love and light
