Is he cheating or am I being Paranoid?

Yeah, you should've. This thread is a little disconcerting. You want us to have some magic words to help you, while you don't want to help yourself. With what you already know about him, he's untrustworthy, so leave him!

I hate to be so blunt and bold, but growing up with 3 sisters; I've always wondered why girls go for these losers and then stick up for them. The way I see it is; you can either leave and be happy, or stick with him and be miserable. We can't decide for you.

 

I know its just hard to get my head around this and i'm scared about being alone and yeah it does seem like I want someone to magically solve all this but the advice on this thread is really helping me and I appreciate it. I'm afraid I won't handle being alone that well.

 

He just texted me he wants to stay together but im the one who needs to decide if he is worth it? I want to say no but If I do I know that in less than a day ill become anxious and want him back.

 

Here's the bottom line.
You're not happy when you're with him, obviously.
He feels the need to get other sexual satisfaction through other people. (Maybe)

He's tugging you in all kinds of directions, and stressing you more and more.
You need to let go.
I know it's scary to think about your life without him. It's horribly terrifying.
I can tell you from personal experience that it can be done, and it's not as hard as you think.
It's obvious in your posts that you aren't afraid to ask him things, but he's not too keen about giving you answers.
Right there should be a red flag.
Not just because it's suspicious, but it's also because it runs into compatibility issues. You're expressive, he isn't.
Some of these things you've mentioned are kind of over paranoid in my opinion, but I don't know you, and based on some of the things you posted, I would be a little over paranoid as well.

 

He is definitely tugging me in all kinds of directions I feel fairly stressed right now. We broke up but i might get anxious and we will get back together. I don't think we are compatible im going to miss him so much though.

It probably isn't as hard as it seems but I don't know it feels that way. He can make me feel like I've made the wrong decision when we break up he is so nice and comforting and says ill find someone else and he will emphasize how he isn't interested in seeing anyone. It just makes me feel like I've made the wrong decision.

 

Turn your phone off for the the next few days. Put the battery in a drawer somewhere. You need some time to yourself to clarify what's going on in your life. Don't call/text/email him anything . Zero Contact. See what it's like

 

^^
that. If you can, change your environment for a few days. Go somewhere for the weekend, itd. Don't stay inside and don't go to places, where you might meet him.

 

OP:

Both.

Some of those are totally fine, some signal a serious problem. But I think an equal problem is that they seem to be in no particular order in you mind, there's harmless things peppered with bad things in random places in your list.

Beware, however, that I have not read the thread since the first post.

 

Just go somewhere for a while. Take a weekend to spend time with other people, or spend a weekend camping or partying.
Sitting and thinking about the break-up will be torturous for you, you need to distract yourself until the beginning pain subsides a bit. <3
That means absolutely no contact with him at that time. Talking to him will only make things worse.
Regain your strength before you do anything rash. <3

 

"He can make me feel like I've made the wrong decision when we break up he is so nice and comforting and says ill find someone else"

You should read this and consider it: http://www.mcafee.cc/Bin/sb.html

 

Oh--that's a good one. Those kind are much too numerous and she's got herself one,it looks like. Hope it takes.

 

Sounds so. But on the other hand he might be just cheating.

 

Thanks everyone for the advice. I really don't think he is a sociopath but he does seem fairly manipulative.

I broke up with him officially today I just needed to think about everything for a few days and come up with a decision I could live with and I know for sure I won't be getting back together with him.

It doesn't matter if he was or wasn't cheating because the way he has been treating me the past few months is enough for me to just call it a day and I should've realised it sooner but I genuinely thought I couldn't survive without him but I know I can I was fine before without any friends and i'll be fine again.

Even if I find no one else it doesn't matter because I would still be happier by myself than with him.

Sorry this thread is turning into a diary for me now so i'll stop

 

Mmmmmmhmmmmmmm he is cheating gurl it is too late mmm mmm he has found some strange that is not so strange any more.nmove on

 

This.

Also this song helped me a lot. A little bit stronger by Sara Evans. Cheesy but I raped the repeat button on my ipod.

 

Good for you. I wish you all the best

 

Thanks

Thanks lively girl for your advice

Its definitely going to get a lot harder before it gets easier but I'll get through it I hope.

 

Good luck