Why women don't have orgasms every time they have sex

Discussion in 'The Orgasmic Experience' started by Rv4961, Jul 31, 2012.

  1. kokujin

    kokujin Senior Member

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    I'm willing to bet a lot of women can come faster but they simply lack the mental fortitude to do so. I think a lot of them think their turn-ons and turn-offs are some holy magical switch that only prince charming can unlock. So it's no wonder their vaginas stay dry and dull.
     
  2. ForgetThisEmail

    ForgetThisEmail Member

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    because you spend too much time
    [​IMG]
     
  3. ForgetThisEmail

    ForgetThisEmail Member

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    or you have [​IMG]
     
  4. ForgetThisEmail

    ForgetThisEmail Member

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    stop bragging you have [​IMG]
     
  5. ForgetThisEmail

    ForgetThisEmail Member

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    this is how you do it to her [​IMG]
     
  6. matchesrulezu

    matchesrulezu Member

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    I have had sex with four guys. The amounts of intercourse with each has varied. Lots of sex with the first and fourth (current partner), only a few times with the second and third. The first guy was about six inches. Second was nine inches. Third was eight or so. And my current partner is probably like seven inches.

    I have never had an orgasm from sexual intercourse with ANY of them. It wasn't even until my current partner that sex actually felt good.


    But a while back I started to basically research the female orgasm because I honestly kind of thought that I was broken. It turns out, it's unfortunately pretty common for women to not orgasm from sexual intercourse. Not impossible, obviously. But there's a lot more to it for us. If we're stressed, pressured, not focused, or don't get a sufficient amount of foreplay..we won't orgasm. That's according to what I've read, at least. Some might not have any issues with my previous statement. I've also read that women who have had some kind of sexual trauma (such as rape or molestation) have a harder time reaching orgasm during sexual intercourse.


    It's all very frustrating.
     
  7. Ivory62

    Ivory62 Senior Member

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    Women don't orgasm all the time because most men are selfish lovers.

    The end.
     
  8. chad1985

    chad1985 Member

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    I suspect you are not cumming because the four men you have been with are only thinking about their own needs, even if they are not aware that they are doing so. How old were these guys? Many younger guys have not had enough sexual experience to focus on making the woman cum, they are overwhelmed by the experience so they basically focus on not cumming themselves, trying to do as much of what they have seen in porn before they finally ejaculate.
    Does this sound right? Did the guys looks you in the eyes, touch you tenderly, and give you lots of foreplay, or where they just 'performing'?
     
  9. matchesrulezu

    matchesrulezu Member

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    Ages: 16, 18, 18, 19
    My first partner, I couldn't even feel. I just let him do his thing.
    Second, same thing. Except he was large enough that I could tell he was inside me.
    Third, same thing.
    Fourth, I love having sex with him. Even without the orgasm, sex is great. He is a little on the selfish side when it comes to foreplay, but I think it's actually inexperience. And talking to him is difficult because I actually think he gets embarrassed by it being pointed out.


    But compared to the other three, my current partner (fourth guy) is much less selfish. I've slept with some real assholes, unfortunately.
     
  10. Ivory62

    Ivory62 Senior Member

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    16-19 year old males aren't men. They're barely human, at least when it comes to sex.....
     
  11. chad1985

    chad1985 Member

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    I haven't heard of too many guys at those ages that know how to properly please a woman! Most are just trying to concentrate on not cumming during sex - it can be so overwhelming when it is new to you and you are young. How long did the last for? 5-10 mins or more? For most women it takes at least about 15-25 minutes of sex before they are prepared to have an orgasm during sex!
     
  12. matchesrulezu

    matchesrulezu Member

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    I would say they all lasted somewhere between 10 & 20 minutes. The last time I had sex with the first guy, it was literally like 3 minutes.
     
  13. chad1985

    chad1985 Member

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    Ouch! 3 minutes?!??! That should not even count as sex ;) Was he nervous or did you overwhelm him?
     
  14. StpLSD25

    StpLSD25 Senior Member

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    I think we scared the OP away somehow in these 4 pages. Did he respond at all?
     
  15. alanwang

    alanwang Guest

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    Maybe your Genitilia is too small ,you should use your hand ,
     
  16. matchesrulezu

    matchesrulezu Member

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    Maybe, lol. We were spending a few days together. My family was going on vacation and they invited him to come along even though they hated him. So we were together for like a week and not able to have sex. It was like a week of foreplay and pure torture for him.


    I don't count the last time we had sex as sex, though. He broke up with me a few weeks after.
     
  17. chad1985

    chad1985 Member

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    Why did he break up with you? I could see how a week of foreplay would be torture on a young guy and how that would make him shoot his cum in like 3 minis.
     
  18. matchesrulezu

    matchesrulezu Member

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    Because he was an immature asshole, haha. He broke up with me over IM too. He was 16 and I was 15. I lost my virginity to him. We were together for like six months, though he actually broke up with me three days before.


    I've been emotionally scarred since. But I was actually able to truly move on after like a year and a half. Like, I wasn't hung up on him for that long. I dated other guys. My relationships just never lasted that long and I usually broke up with them after a month at the longest because I was afraid of getting that deep into a relationship again.
     
  19. twopointsfour

    twopointsfour Member

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    i am guessing, in the nature of animals and reproduction, it is the male which needs to have orgasm during sex for reproduction to be successful, not the female.

    the way reproduction was designed, conception depends upon female ovulation and male insemination. a female's ovulation heightens her sex drive to make her more receptive or seek out. once that is done, insemination is more important to conception. and that then depends upon the male. so to further the odds of insemination the female must remain receptive at least as long as it takes for the male to inseminate.

    if the female climaxes before the male, if the female becomes satisfied before the male does, she may loose interest and "withdraw" before insemination occurs. so, insemination, and therefore conception, is maximized by making the male climax easier/faster than the female.

    so looking at it purely from a reproduction, continuation of the species point of view, the male needs to more easily climax and a female needs to have more of a challenge to climax thus ensuring the male inseminates by orgasiming first.

    and i would venture to guess this is why females are more capable of multiple orgasms. per chance the female does climax before the male orgasm's (and thus inseminates), she knowing or rather feeling an urge to reach another climax increases the chance the male will eventually inseminate, um, get there.
     
  20. monkjr

    monkjr Senior Member

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    Yeah nature is pretty cold....it basically tells the females of many species "gimmie babies now!"

    There's also a theory that women orgasm as a way for the cervix or uterus to dip itself in the seminal deposit by the map....so male makes his deposit comes first female comes next and the cervix dips in the pool of semen at the back of the vagina increasing reproduction chances.
     

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