Help understanding girlfriend/past

Background:

My girlfriend and I are perfect with each other. We are truly soul mates if you believe in that. We will be together forever because we have so much love and are so good together. One of the reasons why we are so good is because we have all the same like, beliefs and thoughts.

One of the similarities we share is that we didn't want to have a lot of partners throughout life. In fact we each only wanted to have one. We saw family and friends that slept around, ended up pregnant or with STDs etc. We both just believe that's what's right for us.

I was able to stay strong on this, but she ended up getting pressured into having sex twice, with a different guy (long before we met).

She's always been very insecure, never had a lot of friends growing up, or had friends attend birthday parties etc. And the friends she did have were very slutty for lack of a better word. She always felt like she was looked down on and treated like a kid. Even though she had strong believes she ended up getting drunk and having sex on different occasions.

I always say I am good at understanding psychology and people, and I understand it had to be tough for her in today's world. But I still struggle with that.

She will sometimes be in tears wishing we would have met and she never would have done those things. She just felt the pressure, got drunk and swayed by a guy that said all the right things to get into her pants. She really hates that this happens and hates this guy. He is also a reason why she slept with another guy, because he kept calling her a virgin still. But as much as she hated this guy and what happened she still kept a couple pictures and texts. I assume to feel loved. She only met him in person that one time and that was the only picture. But he texted her for years after that to stay in touch and try to get in her pants.

I know it's got to be tough not having a lot of friends, feeling like a loser and being the only virgin in today's world.


Question:

My question is can you help me understand her mindset? Even though she had strong beliefs, she still slept with that guy and then another. Was it all just from the pressure? What's it like being a girl without many friends, where you feel the pressure?

And why would she still have texts and pictures a year and a half after we have been together?

Can you just help me understand her mindset, situation etc? And how to I move past it?

 

sorry, it doesn't make sense to me either.

 

she's lying to you to make you feel better. she wanted their dicks.

 

^ agreed, I've never heard of anyone tripping and falling and landing on some dick.

 

I think you both sound too young to have "just one" partner. Sorry but I think you both should sow your oats. Just because she said she only wanted to have one partner doesn't mean she really just wanted to have one partner. It could mean she WISHES she wanted to have just one partner.

 

She's a liar.

And/or a raging slut.

And totally insecure besides.

That type of behavior and that type of friend are self reinforcing.

Because I'm a chronological slut: I agree with orison. Hopefully she grows up and stops being stupid, and hopefully you grow up and stop being naive.

 

they sound 15-16..

 

Okay first of all the past is the past and everyone has one! The key is to not live in the past. I would not be bothered in any way by the fact that my partner has a past, but the part about her keeping texts and pics of this guy she had such a terrible time with tells me that she is having problems moving on from the past. It makes no sense really. She needs to put that part of her life aside to move on with you and you need to get over the fact that she has had other partners. The best way for you to make those others not matter is to be the best lover she could ever imagine. Eat that pussy like it is the only one on earth and do it alot. Spend the time to find out what really makes her tick. Make her cum and when she does do it again and again. Do what it takes to show her that you are all the man she needs.