Caught my wife...

I appreciate all the responses. I've just not been talking about while I weigh everything and lo and behold she hasn't brought it back up.

 

I am on the "other" side, if there is one. My marriage was pretty bad, Had not had sex for a few years, and before that, maybe once a year for the three or four before that. I eventually started going onto a social site and started talking to a few people, I started "expanding my horizons", understanding new things about myself. That left her behind, because along with everything else, we did/do not communicate at all. She of course, blames that on me, and while that might be true, it wasn't ever like I felt I could talk to her about anything without being wrong/perverted/whatever.

Finally, I filed for divorce. Am in the process of divorce still. I moved out and do not regret it for one minute. Will I ever meet some of the people I talked to online? I doubt it!! I never cheated on my wife, in any other way, than online. If you want to stay with her...open communication is the only way!! Good luck.

 

I have a girlfriend that is a hot sexy woman and her husband has lost interest in sex over the last few years. She says she is sick of walking around horny all the time but isn't ready to actually seek out a sexual relationship. She loves her husband. I found out she is cyber sexing guys and asked her about it. She told me that she feels really guilty but she said but it helps her cope with her lack of a sex life. I had no answers or suggestions for her. Nor do I for the OP. Maybe you should try to look into whats lacking in your sex life with her or in the relationship as a whole. There are always at least two sides to every story. The problem is finding out all the sides. We all need better communications skills I think.

 

Doesn't matter if it is considered cheating or not! It is deceitfull and dishonest. These are two things i refuse to live with in a relationship. Without open communication and trust there is nothing worth stayin for in my mind. I know there is better then that and I would not settle for anything else. Also there are not to many guys out there that are just looking for friendship from woman. My guess is most of these friends of hers would like a whole lot more then that and would do whatever it takes to get it. My current girlfriend had lots of guys she only considered friends before we started dating. Almost ever one of them tried to take advantage of that friendship at some point. Mostly when they thought she might be vunerable. Changed how she looked at things that is for sure.

 

Life is short. Staying in a miserable marriage doesn't make much sense to me. Just my 2 cents worth.

 

Thanks pal, 19 years worth of bad...OK maybe the first 5 to 10 weren't too bad, but it went downhill fast.

 

Are you even sure a guy sent this? Maybe it was just a joke from a female friend.

 

Dude I'm sorry to hear that... this sucks.

Yeah that other pic didnt just get there accidentally. Tell her you dont believe her. Get her to admit it and work from there. The choice fo forgive and move on or kick her ass to the curb remains yours.

 

This ^^^

 

That's messed up. Her keeping them away from you is the big thing to me (and of course the behind-your-back in general).

I understand many men and women have to have some lives away from their spouse - but the sexual life should not be included in that.

I think it is important for you to try to remain somewhat understanding - she might not realize exactly how wrong this is to you, she might be having trouble seeing outside of her own justifications - but like other posters said; you have to become more firm, as well.

She needs to know what you won't put up with and that you care about her, and you want things to get better between you - but there are some things that just aren't okay.


I have a few questions.

Would you be less or more bothered if you knew more about her online friends?
Would it bother you if she kept relations with whomever was in the video?
Do you still trust her?
Were you snooping?
Have there been problems in your relationship?
Do you suspect why she did this? Did you ask?
Do you think it's been an ongoing thing?
Do you suspect her of cheating in real life, or suspect she would?
Have there been problems with your love life recently?