I have always been terrible at relationships. I am a kind of off-the-wall guy, although I don't think my outward behaviors mark me as particularly abnormal. After high school I experienced some weight gain and while I was never fat, I approached the "husky" category. As a result, my self-esteem withered. This summer, I got back into shape, dropping nearly 25 lbs and I can say in honesty that I am an attractive guy. I notice women notice me more now; I have gained confidence and flirt more often. However, I am either unable or reluctant to move past mere flirting. There are a number of factors here...For one thing, I am not particularly hungry for sex. Some guys seem to have no other passion that competes with their desire for sex, but I find sex not to be of too much interest at all times...My last girlfriend hurt me a great deal, and this may also be disincentive to engage...I also think remnants of low confidence and poor self-esteem still remain in my personality. I wonder whether I am pathological...shouldn't a 23 year old guy, in good health, with a normal social life, be desirous of sex and willing to pursue it? Shouldn't a guy, at age 23, be at least somewhat competent in the skill of acquiring sex? ...just thoughts...comment or don't comment
you do know your avatar has been a female since you got here with us @hipforum.. this post blew my mind like mescaline.. Sex shouldnt be hard to find. its Love and Companionship that is elusive..
desirous, yes. willing, not necessarily. they make it such a huge task, it's debatable whether it's actually worth it. competent, not everyone has the same skill sets.
...strange that in a forum for open-minded and liberated people any cartoon face with long hair is female... There is no "identity crisis," I simply never thought the avatar meant I was female. I just thought it was cool.
Sex is fun. I remember back in highschool when I was a virgin I thought it was the be-all end-all. Three years later I'd went through 4 girlfriends and had plenty of sex and I can safely say if I never had sex again I would be okay. Yes you should desire sex but don't feel like you need to be having regular sex or something is wrong with you. Some people just aren't as into it as other's and that's just who they are. Not everyone's the same.
there's several longhaired male avatars available here, but yours looks feminine for some reason (i really can't put my finger on what it is, but it looks like a girl). i feel like brudof's avatar up there is a guy, and it has pretty long hair too. then again, when you're drawing very simple cartoon faces, it's generally easiest to use long hair to signify that the face is a girl, because there's not much else you can draw on there to make the distinction.
Something about the face and the way the hair is shaped has feminine qualities. Also raga mala as a name might contribute, it may seem feminine with the As at the end like the feminine spelling in Spanish. If your desire for sex is low maybe thats a good thing in the long run. You won't have to live your life obsessing over sex. But at some point if you do go to find a partner it may be very difficult. "Oh your 32 and still a virgin, hmm next please." Its like trying to find a job at that age, people want experience. I would try to find a relationship with someone who would tend to your needs and not find the inexperience as a bad thing. Find a girl thats okay with showing you the ropes. Get your self-esteem up too, look in the mirror and tell yourself your a champ. Get out and talk to people. Talking to people always brings more people. Maybe even watch a porn or something. Get in touch with your sexual nature.
1. Not a girl. 2. Also not a virgin. I have had sexual relationships before. I don't have the most notches on my belt but I would not consider myself "inexperienced." I was referring only to the current phase of my life. It's been about 11 months at this point since my last sexual encounter. I've noticed I have many friends who would consider this an unbearably long dry spell. One of my friends was just agonizing about passing his 1-year anniversary since getting laid. It does not bother me and I don't consider something to be missing from my life when I'm not getting some. Aside from the avatar discussion, which I think is kind of silly, I am enjoying the viewpoints on here, though.
Anyway hormone level equals sex drive to the extent that you do not have control of your autonomous nervous system.
