Love vs. sex

I may be an optimist but I do think that you can have both with the same person.

It takes work but then most things in life worth doing take work.

 

yes, and thanks for implying I'm miserable

 

Oh, I had random sex as a young person, then 27 years of monogamy, and now random sex as a wise old person. Pretty dang good.

 

well she really only implied that if she also implied that she is you.

 

I was in a relationship for 10 years. During that tied down completely faithful. After that I had a fuck buddy for a few
months. Now every random few weeks I get me some.

"Sex is natural. I go with nature."- Marilyn Monroe

I've never had an open relationship (in terms of seeking outside the relationship randomly or having a 3rd partner), but I'm always up to try something new.

 

if she was doing what I was doing she would be miserable. Not a very warm or friendly statement intending to build someone up.

 

no, i don't think the point of it was to build you up, just to express her feelings on the subject.

i would be miserable if i was having gay sex, but that's just me; i'm not trying to build up or bring down gay people.

 

Correct, she was not intending to build up, nor was it neutral. There is insult in the comment.

Her feeling on the subject is about love vs sex. It's should not be about someone elses feeling on the subject of love vs sex.

 

Go to the gay forum, and tell them you would be miserable. I don't think they would like it.

 

I really don't think antithesis meant any harm by her statement and you're ruining a perfectly good thread by going on over it. She would be miserable if she did things the way you do, you are not miserable, the end. Let's move on with the thread now, shall we?

 

the quote feature is handy in that you can reference a statement that relates to what you want to say instead of just repeating it yourself.

and going into the gay forum is not a comparison to this at all, unless this thread was in the "love with one man and sex with lots of others" forum.

but really, i have no idea what the hell antithesis was getting at. i just didn't read it as an insult, but it's really not worth arguing over for several pages.

 

I have to say I agree that sex is better when love is involved from my own experience, but at the same time, it can still get boring as shit, love or not. But that doesn't mean you have to go gallivanting around and find someone else to spark it up again, you just have to get a little creative. Honestly, the only guy I've ever orgasmed with is the one I'm marrying, so I'm not really certain I could get complete satisfaction from casual sex. Doesn't mean I wouldn't try if I were single. lol

 

I wasn't really getting at anything. I was simply saying that I enjoy monogamous relationships and I am happy to just have sex with one person for the rest of my life. Having to have a variety is the opposite of what would make me happy. I also clearly stated that not everyone has to agree with me. If someone makes a claim that everyone needs variety then yeah, I am going to disagree with them. It's called a discussion...

I can't really understand how this is an insult to anyone... after all, it is my life and not theirs. I think someone implying that this is not how I really feel but is just how I 'think' I feel is what I consider to be the insult.

 

Thank you, this is it exactly. One should notice the key word "I" in my post. Anyway, case closed. Moving on...

I think probably part of love being involved for me is that I am a nervous person and it takes a while for me to be comfortable enough with someone to open myself up to interesting sexual things. So if I was just having sex with someone that I wasn't connected to I would probably not be able to enjoy it and they wouldn't enjoy it much either.

 

I have great memories from one night stands, I have great memories from relationships that I wasn't in love with the gal. And I have great memories of sex and love making with my wife of 24 years. I love being in love, the sex is amazing at times and some times it's just sex and then off to sleep.

 

Holy shit, people are allowed to post opinions that don't necessarily stoke the egos of others.

I don't want sex with multiple men, either. I would feel used. I have been with the same man for 18 years and we are still in love.

 

It seems love complicates sex, and sex complicates love. Its like expectations go way up or something.

 

It seems that you don't understand that not everyone wants what you want. Half this thread is you being defensive over nothing.

 

I haven't been on Hip Forums that long but I have been in enough argumentative threads to realize that there are certain people, for whom sex is no big deal, when you get a scratch itch it, just hook up, fuck and move along. and there are those who believe sex is only good within a loving monogamous relationship. and lastly there are some who believe you can be in a loving relationship AND have sex with multiple partners.

And I have figured out that no amount of arguing will get anyone to switch which group they belong to.

I am done answering, justifying or explaining why my way is better. I am happily married for 15+ years, have never had sex with anyone with my wife in that time and she has never had sex with anyone but me. I have zero interest in other partners and feel sorry for those who don't get to have what my wife and I have.

but I also know that most people either don't want, can't have or have been unable to find what we have so I just thank God for blessing me with such a beautiful, sexy, wonderful wife.

 

well said....