I have been married for 2 years now and previously 8 years dating with my now husband. S in total me and mu husband have been together for 10 years. He is a family type of man, which means he can stays home eryday playing online games but he dsnt like me to hang out til nite with my colleagues. He is conservative and thinks women who always hang out wit guys are kinda cheapskate. We quarreled many times over tis kinda matter coz I am out-going person and enjoys hanging out wit guys even a simple dinner. To me, male frens are more open-minded and I juz feel good talking to them. But there werent any issues about love coz we are merely colleagues/frens. I never liked to kiss my husband or vice versa. I dun enjoy sex with him. I always thought I am not tat kinda person who enjoys sex until i fell in love wit my long-time colleague (K). It is quite complicated. K expressed his love to me years before i married. But during tat time, i felt he's not my type and rejected a few times. Then i got married to my husband. I enjoy being with my husband all these 10 years, even until now. But I just cant figure out wat to do now. I have started relationship wit K and enjoys having sex with him (thou he dsnt lasts long). I know well that what im doing is totally wrong. I feel guilty to my husband and at the same time, guilty to K as well coz I cant give him any commitment. The thought of divorce kinda scares me. My husband treats me better n better after which i mentioned to him about K. My husband has changed a lot recently and right now i m not sure who to choose and wat to do.
Okay... so this is a serious thread? Okay... you feel guilt- but to both. You love your husband? But you're not attracted to him at all? Okay, do this... picture that you're gonna lose your husband .. I mean somehow make those emotions that you would feel real (as real as you can... hint hint)- and then...do you feel attraction to him then? What would you feel like if you'd never see him again? Should figure it out for you.
I know my life wld be turned upside down without my husband around. He treats me really good from the 1st day we had been together until now. 10 years time.. I asked for a break-up with my colleague. But i found myself crying almost everyday after the breakup and i started to slit my wrist juz to make myself feel better. Im having mild depression.
