Ok I'm to embarrassed to go to anyone I know and I cant find any sexual advice helplines that aren't directed at teens so thought I would try here. I'm male, 22 years old and a virgin never found anyone one is was particularly interested in until now. I've only just recently stared seeing someone who is great. we haven't gone the whole way and had sex yet because I want to give it a bit more time first but she has given me a hand job and a blowjob the only problem is neither of those times I've been able to cum and next thing you know I'm going flaccid in her hand. I'm incredibly attracted to her and she is defiantly doing a great job I mean it feels freaking incredible but as much as I might not want to end its got to eventually lol. I should also point out this is my first experience receiving either a hand job or blowjob as well. any advice would be great because its doing my head in being patient my whole life and when things start to go good I make a total dick of myself. (no pun intended)
Anxiety often manifest itself in one of the following ways during sexual interaction. 1 ) premature ejaculation 2 ) difficulty reaching orgasm 3 ) erectile dysfunction. It sounds like you've been experiencing the second and the third. Are you very nervous about sharing sexual moments with your partner? Or, are you under stress in general? If so, that may be the reason why you're experiencing your problem. You soul and mind needs to be at peace first, or else the arousal will be tinged by your negative emotions, emotional strain, whatnot, and the two energies may feed off each other, potentially(and usually often) creating problems. Soooo............ Try to relax.
There are also several medications that can cause someone to have difficulty orgasming, but it could also be that you're not in the right mindset. Try to really relax and just let your climax come to you. Now, as far as losing an erection, it is possible, in some cases, that the body has difficulty maintaining the blood flow needed for an erection. Try sitting up slightly.
I love how our world works. To embarrassed to tell a couple friends, but fearless to tell a couple million on the internet This sounds like a classic case of nerves as it sounds like this is the farthest you've been with a woman. If you really like her and feel comfortable telling her I would just spill your guts and tell her (if she doesn't already know) that this is as far as you've ever been and probably just nervous. If you don't tell her she may think there's something wrong with her and you don't want that. Once you get things out in the open I think you'll have better success. Seriously the mind plays a powerful role far as your performance down their goes
This actually happened to a guy I dated when I was a junior in high school. He took me to prom, and afterward I tried having sex with him. I was on top, rubbing all over him. He was totally into it but when I put my hand down his pants he was super soft. I was like, freaked out because up until then I had never had that experience. He was super embarrassed. He was saying he still wanted to keep going but I was freaked out and not interested. A few of my friends said that he had that experience with other girls. Knowing him, I've been friends with him half+ my life, it was performance anxiety. Once he got his "stuff" anxiety together, he started having regular sex with someone I know. Don't stress over how its "supposed" to be. Just do what feels good and touch her how you want to. Let it flow
