getting in trouble, because of fuckin a 13 year old girl

I don't often post here but I've just turned 18. My perspective? Most girls in my area of my age now became sexually active at 12 or 13. Many of them were very sexually aggressive at that age but are a little more careful now. The main trouble is so many of them are so well built at 12 to 14 today. I can see why the older guys hit on them. The girls look great and they're not shy. The legal issue is a little funny given how common such activity is. But the courts need someone in the docket to make money, I suppose and older guys are sitting ducks.

 

I never said that we should all go out and fuck 13 year-olds...or even that 13 year-olds have sex was a good idea.

It's just that it's pretty much obvious that if a 13 year-old decides that they want to have sex, they are *going* to have sex. Be that with an adult, or with a person their own age. (And what really is the fundamental difference between a 13 year-old fucking another 13 year old, or a 23 year old? Is there one? Is the act any less "slutty" or more "innocent" if it's with a person her own age?)

I'm not sure it's such a good idea for adults to have sex with adolesents because there is always the issues of control and power and pressure (but hey, they face those with their peers as well, so)...but then again, maybe in some cases it would be better because an adult may be more experienced and perhaps more carefull. (But then again, who am I fooling...most "adults" are just as stupid and irresponsible as kids!)

The bottom line is that kids probably *shouldn't* be having sex, but in the real world they *do*, and have been for all time and you are fooling yourselves if you think othewise.

And I don't think they are having sex with any more frequency today than they have for all of mankind's existence. It's only just talked about more openly these days. Hell, the who idea of a stage between child and adult called "adolesence" is a fairly moder western invention...for most of history, and indeed in much of the world, "old enough to bleed" has been the rule. (Not the exception.) If you could bare children, you were/are an adult, and are *expected* to. And often they are married off to much older men.

Problem today is that because of better diet (and perhaps more hormones in our food) girls are going through puberty even earlier...some at 9 & 10, but many at 13 & 14...this compared to around 16, only 100 years ago. Girls are reaching sexual maturity far before they reach mental maturity. (If indeed, most girls - or guys - ever reach mental "maturity".)

All that has to be taken into account, and I don't think that with any situation hard and fast black and white rules cut it. (In my case, they may have hurt the kid *more*.) And look t the guy who started this thread, if he had just wated a few months, when the girl turned 14, he'd not have gotten in any legal trouble. But seriously, what in that girl's head would have magically changed and been different in only a couple of months that would have suddenly made it a-okay for her to now have sex?

It's like what at 21 supposedly suddenly magically changes and makes it okay for us to be able to drink responsibily???

You know, I know a lady (now 34) who got married at 16, to a 25 year-old because she was pregnant. Today, they are still married and have 3 kids. But are most 16 year olds ready to have kids? Hell no! I even don't think most *26* year olds are!

Girls are more "slutty" today not because they have sex, but because society objectifies and sexualizes and exploits little girls to make money.
And you can blame Madison Avenue and Hollywood and JoJo and Britney for that...not some kid in Germany who couldn't keep his pants on...

 

l feel sad for you.. If a 40 yr old man farked a 13 yr old he would be labeled as a child molester. Will you be farking 13 yr olds when you are older?

 

God I *hope* so!

(I keed. I keed.)

 

totally, right on to everything wonkothesane said, finally someone with some pure intelligent words.

 

Ok mabey im just stupid, but hey if you liked her and she liked you or say you both just wanted to have sex then its fine...by me, but if you did it and she didnt want it then thats sick...but by the sounds of it.your cool by me

 

Were you guys humping outside or something? I'm wondering how the cop saw you.

Also, I'm kind of in the same situation, only backwards. I have a relationship with a 16 year old who's parents are NOT happy about it. They threaten me with statutory rape charges, but there's no proof that we've had sex so I don't think I have anything to worry about. Or do I? What do you think?

 

I read this whole exhausting thread. And there is one thing no one is really hitting on. The reason why those laws are initiated, is because older males know how to manipulate younger females. (and vice/versa) Yourger females also sometimes look at dating an older male, as a status image. Ive learned over the years though, check 2 forms of ID before going through the act. (Women seem to be growing up much faster these days.)

In florida 16 is legal. That is somewhat understandable. I say somewhat, because I personally wouldn't be attracted to a 16 year old. I was listening to loveline the other night. (show with adam corolla and Dr Drew.) And there was a 19 or 20 year old on that was courting a 15 year old. But as you listened to him, he was obviosly on the same maturity plane as the young lady. (no offence to anyone but he may have been labeled as a "nerd") This doesn't justify it, but I can see why the 2 may have had something in common.

But my main point is. Older guys date women around their own age when they can get women around their own age, and when they have reached that maturity. Say though a guy is dating a girl who is 13 or under, and he is 16 or older, I think manipulation plays a good factor in that situation. Younger people are easier to manipulate, In a situation that someone has put their "heart," in.

 

get a girl your own age and lay off the drugs-- unless you want to spend time in jail

 

I think it's ridiculous that our society thinks maturity can be measured with a number!

 

lol this is a 13 year old we are talking about, 13 year olds are children. We have to set limits or else every dirty bastard would be after little children. And it is are job at a society of adults to protect our children. WHen I was 13 I was still playing with barbies. Yes after 18 it shouldnt matter how old your spouce is, unless its a child!

 

mmmk, no...yeah it's hard to find a mature 13 year old anyway. Not saying there aren't any, but at that age their brains have JUST STARTED to really change, and regardless of that a girl's body is not even CLOSE to being mature at 13. Puberty for women, even though it may not be as noticeable after about 17, does not completely end until about 19 or 20. A 13 year old just should not be having sex...I'm sorry...but it's not mentally or physically a very good idea. And if some little 13 yr. old ho is gettin up on your stuff, knock the bitch off...let some other retard get in trouble.

 

+ if a 13 year old gets pregnant she has a higher chance of dying durring pregnancy because their bodies arent prepared for it

 

I think that with someone who is the young person's own age there is the state of 'innocence' associated with both parties whereas with an adult there's always the idea that the young person is being taken advantage of.

While there's always the potential for control, power and pressure in any type of sexual relationship, I think that this is a different situation when compared to a situation where both parties agreed to the act in question. This should be covered under a different statute than "statutory rape", but I do feel that if a young person has suffered due to the actions of someone's abuse that the age factor should be taken into consideration.

You may be correct in that having an experience with an adult while an adolescent may be a positive experience in that the adult can have knowledge, experience and skill that a peer may not have. Like anything else, any type of abuse can't and shouldn't be tolerated. Let's not forget that in some primitive cultures, it was not uncommon for adolsecents coming of age to have the adults of the community introduce them to sexual experiences.

Whether or not teens should or shouldn't be having sex is an issue we may never resolve. Being that many will have sex is reason enough that we must arm teens with the necessary information they'll need to have a healthy attitude toward sex and sexuality. Perhaps what should be a discussion is not age of consent but capability of consent. While I'm at it, the 'Abstinence Only' campaign embraced by many fundamentalist zealots as well as many in the Bush administration is counterproductive in promoting healthy attitudes about sex.

I think that you probably have to blame the hormones that are put into our foods much more so than diet for the age of the onset of puberty being lowered more so than anything else. You may have a point regarding maturity there.

Well said! Unfortunately, many of us have are very uneasy when it comes to dealing with the taboos of society. Many parents try to 'sweep' what are supposedly the 'ills' of society 'under the rug' and not deal with problems that their kids will be faced with as they age. This is probably less the case today, but I think it still remains a factor. We need to educate our young people so that they'll be able to make intelligent decisions about these matters.

While I'm at it, one of the things that bothers me is that there are young people vindictive enough to willfully engage in sexual relations with someone in which they know it's taboo and, if possible, will leverage the law against the adult in question for the sole purpose of gaining notoriety or some other purpose. Also, I have to question parents doing the same when they discover that their kid willingly engaged in such activity. One thing parents need to realize is that they need to develop character in their kids from the time that they are born-NOT when they are teenagers! If I was a juror on a statutory rape case, unless it could be proven to me that the young person suffered at the hands of the defendant, I would likely vote for acquittal. My feeling: NO VICTIM, NO CRIME! (FTR, If you're ever selected for jury duty in the future regardless of the case, I advise you to check out the following website for information regarding your rights as a juror: www.fija.org)

This shows a great deal of maturity on behalf of both parties especially when you consider that most relationships which started out this way usually end up in divorce.

I question whether the fashion and entertainment industries can be solely responsible for promoting wantan promiscuity. True, they have done their share in doing so, but I believe that government restrictions of sex as well as the influence of religious zealotry with its hellfire and damnation tactics have done much more to cause people to rebel against this sort of opression. When I hear a quote such as: "As long as there are American who hate and fear sex, there will be Congress members trying to prove that they hate and fear sex more than anything else" (Sen. Sam Brownback[R-KS]), It should cause concern for all of us. www.libchrist/sexed/Congressliesporn.html

FTR, I'd like to say that despite any disagreements that I may have with you, you presented your arguements here well. I respect your intelligence.

 

When I was 13/14, I was trying to get my 12/13 year old boyfriend to have sex with me. It all depends on the person.

 

I think it's fine for anyone to be having sex as long as it's consentual on both parts. If two people want to do it, they're gonna do it.

Absolutely. Thespeez, I completely agree with you about everything, I think.

 

Sooooooooooooooooooooo.....buddy squirrel got his nut.
Nice job!

 

Like BrokenHunny said, we have to draw the line somewhere. Of course it's silly that at suddenly, at midnight on your birthday, all the maturity you need to have consentual sex (or to vote, or to drive, or to drink) suddenly comes crashing into your head... the day before it wasn't there and now it is. Yeah right. And there are a lot of differences between individuals. But we do have to do something, draw a line in a place and hope that line isn't too arbitrary, is somehow based on people looking around and finding some kind of average. I do support most of those lines; the US drinking age at 21 doesn't seem to work well (but that's another thread), but the driving, voting, and consentual sex, well, I do support those. There might be *some* young kids who're truly in love with much older people -earlier this year there was the school kid who had a relationship with his teacher and even though she spent a loooooong time in jail and he certainly must've had all kinds of counsellors and others to talk him outa it, they got married after she got out- but *most* of these things don't work out... if it were okay to have sex with 12 & 13 year old teenagers, I'm afraid there would be far more cases where it seriously went wrong than not... so it isn't okay, and it shouldn't be. Just wait -or pay the price.

 

I saw that movie about the teacher and the student. She left her husband and family for a 14 year old. She spent I think 8 year in jail