I agree that every person is different, so I won't presume to generalize about anal sex or any other kind. I 'll just share my experiences and opinion. The first anal sex I had with a girl was when I was home from college for the summer. This girl was one of the sweetest people I ever met. She had the reputation of being a slut or nympho. I didn't find that to be true at all. She was young, alive, full of laughter and openness, and just adored all forms of sexual pleasure. On our last afternoon together, we were naked on top of the bed enjoying foreplay when she surprised me by rolling over on her stomach and smiling. No words were necessary. I got on my knees between her legs, spread her cheeks and went inside her. She made a face but didn't say a word. I never felt such intense pleasure, far beyond vaginal and oral sex. When I pulled out, my penis was covered with soft feces. I was horrified and disgusted. She just laughed. From her response I learned that the stinky-messy-disgusting thing is just an attitude from being told as children that poo-poo is nasty and we're bad for doing it and playing with it. Then I asked her how it was for her, how it felt and did she like it. She gave me a sweet smile and said, "It hurts, but you know I love it." That was my first clue that the brain can cross-wire pleasure and pain, which IMO is the basis of BDSM, which millions of people already love and hundreds of millions of people are now considering from the "Fifty Shades of Grey" phenomenon. My second anal sex was with a girl I didn't know very well. She was a vaginal virgin and picked me to be her first guy. NSA wasn't in my sexual vocabulary at that time, but looking back I see that's what she wanted and why she picked me. We did it on the front seat of my '56 Chevy, with me down on the floorboard and her on the edge of the seat with her legs in the air. Well, guess what. I put it in the wrong hole. I ejaculated instantly and knew I was done for the night. It happened that her rectum was empty, so there was no mess. I played dumb and said, "Well, how did you like it?" She said, "I don't know. I never felt anything like that before." She wasn't interested in a second date. My third anal sex was with a girl in college I really loved. We had been sleeping together for months when one night after too much to drink I decided I wanted her back door. She screamed repeatedly in fear and pain, but I wouldn't stop. She could have charged me with rape, but she cared enough about me to forgive me the next day when I blamed it on the alcohol and promised not to do it again. Flash forward to modern times. I became friends on Experience Project with a woman 30 years younger than me whose husband had lost interest in having sex with her. We began a long correspondence where I helped her overcome her negative psychological conditioning about sex from her fundamentalist Christian upbringing. I gave her advice on using toys to masturbate, which she had never done because of her childhood training. Eventually she became curious about anal sex, so I gave her information about enemas, condoms, start small, relax and breathe deeply, lots of lube, all the stuff that everyone here knows. Well, let me tell you, her husband discovered a new and intense interest in making love to her again. She became empowered and capable of saying to him, "Give me what I want and I'll give you what you want. But you have to please me first." She no longer expects to divorce him and she just gave birth to their first child. She tells me that her bottom is just about ready for hubby again. So here's my opinion. If you're a woman, experiment on yourself. If you like, do it. If you want a man to do it to you, just roll over and smile. He'll respond. If you don't like it, but you have a man you really love and you can arrange things so you can take it and have it on your terms, anal sex is in my opinion one of the biggest gifts of pleasure that a woman can give to a man. You'd have to have a penis to understand how good it feels.
I was going to call you a silly goose, but it just wouldn't be the truth. You are a vanilla gorilla gone ape! Perhaps you had that kind of upbringing. I grew up encouraged to embrace bodily functions such as flatulence and elimination. I would tell my mother jokes about offending myself with the odor I'd left after moving my bowels, and hearing, "There's more room out than in!" as she chuckled in response. I grew up cleaning up other people's shit, and from that and a basic understanding of hygiene and disease prevention, I learned that shit is disgusting because it smells unpleasant, can leave stains, and most importantly it can carry bacteria and viruses, and should not be applied to other mucus membranes. Hell, my grandmother gets shit in her eye if she manages to get into the bathroom and bathe herself before I can stop her. She washes her asshole first, then her hips, vulva and face. Every time. And she won't stop until you force her to stop. Each and every time this happens, her eyes bulge out of her face like two big radishes. The opthamologist gives her an anti-biotic eye drop. It takes two weeks to fully heal. Why? Because feces being dirty is truth, not an old wives tale.
I reread my post and didn't see where I recommended rubbing feces in my lover's eyes. I'm sorry for the plight of old people. I had to clean my demented mother-in-law's ass when she was in hospice care in our home. My wife has macular degeneration and couldn't see well enough to do it. I contributed to this forum because of my passion for expressing love and sharing pleasure. When I look at my human existence, I don't focus on the pathology of bacteria and viruses. They are abundant in all orfices, and staying clean is easy and common knowledge. But as Frank Zappa said in a song, the ugliest part of the body is the mind. That is what I am addressing. Any mode of sex, any expression of relationship, can be a delight or a disaster, according to one's thinking.
Perhaps your time would have been more profitably spent re-reading my post. I didn't accuse you of suggesting any such thing. Instead, I took issue with your suggestion that feces are only messy, stinky, and disgusting in the mind, by attitude, and asserted that the general population's aversion to shit is fact-based, and not spawned of confusion nor a stifling upbringing. To illustrate my point, I referred to the lighthearted attitude my family encouraged regarding all bodily functions including flatulence, defacation, and sex, things I know to be taboo topics in other families. You take a cavalier attitude about the introduction of your partner's feces to your urethra. I countered that with an example of what happens when shit is repeatedly introduced to other mucus membranes, even when it is one's own mess. If you've ever had a yeast infection, or found that your lovers are very prone to them, it's probably related to your willingness to get shit all over your dick in the name of pleasure. Copraphilia notwithstanding, it is reasonable -not uptight- for people who believe in safer sex practices to avoid having to deal with shit, and to take precautions to avoid exposing partners to smashed turds. Your human existence may completely ignore pathology, but your immune system does not. I'm not saying I never got some fecal matter on a partner's dick. I absolutely have. I'm also not saying it is cause to freak out. The three partners it happened with and I were calm about it as we went to clean up a bit and get back into it. However, to say we didn't find it disgusting would be false. Of course it was disgusting when despite our best efforts we got my shit on their dicks. At the time, we're we thinking specifically about Candida, e. coli, salmonella, shigella or any other nasty bugs found in most poop? No, of course not. We had the common sense to have a general disdain for the spreading of shit and just knew it was meant to be cleaned up so we could get back to more pleasant means of passing time together. Copraphilia is considered deviant for good reason.
you asking as a woman or as a man? are you afraid as a man to hurt someone? that's a good attitude, you'll get alot more anal that way. As a woman, well there's lots of posts on how to work up to it, and enjoy it, but requires a partner you trust. Dont satisfy for bearable, make sure you enjoy it!
I have this problem with some lubes too - change lubes. I use coconut oil now, which is alot better and doesnt cause the same issues with natural bacteria eating the glycerine in the lube causing gas...
I've only had anal once. It was with a young guy. He didn't warn me he just spread my cheeks and boom he was in. It was very painful.
She's a lucky woman to have someone who's bigger. Most men i was with were Asian. Now im not confirming any stereotypes, but he was only 4 inches when he was erect. Yes i measured him. Im not discriminating but it's a lot more fun with a bigger man.
Anal is usually one of those things I do if I'm horny enough. It hurts like a bitch sometimes though For tips on anal go to www.AboutSexLove.com
My husband and me never tried. I tried it before with an ex-boyfriend, but hated it. My husband is pretty well hung, so it would be even more painful.
I hear you. I recently started a cuckolding relationship with my husband (it was both of our fantasies). I like anal sex but only from time to time with my husband who is 6 inches (and it still hurts). My ex-boyfriend is between 7.5-8 inches and I don't think I could ever allow him to take me that way.
When I was with my ex-boyfriend he used to push me against a tree my face pushed against it. He would pull my knickers down to my ankles & kick my legs apart. He would then part my buttocks with his thumb & then thrust his cock deep inside me thrusting hard & fast. I had explosive orgasms as he did this
To me, anal is more of an opener, if you will. It's a tease for me. Start with the butt, but end with the vagina lol Of course, before switching, a cleaning will be required. Not healthy to mix those 2 fluids. Least back to front, I mean.
