Dear President Bush: Congratulations on your victory over all us non-evangelicals. Actually, we're a bit ticked off here in California, so we're leaving. California will now be its own country. And we're taking all the Blue States with us. In case you are not aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon, Washington, Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois, and all of the North East. We spoke to God, and she agrees that this split will be beneficial to almost everybody, and especially to us in the new country of California. In fact, God is so excited about it, she's going to shift the whole country at 4:30 pm EST next Friday. Therefore, please let everyone know they need to be back in their states by then. So you get Texas and all the former slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot Spitzer. You get Ken Lay. (Okay, we have to keep the Governator; we can live with that.) We get the Statue of Liberty. You get OpryLand. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole Miss. We get 85% of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get all the technological innovation in Alabama. We get about two-thirds of the tax revenue, and you get to make the red states pay their fair share. Since our divorce rate is 22% lower than the Christian coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms to support, and we know how much you like that. Did I mention we produce about 70% of the nation's veggies? But heck the only greens the Bible-thumpers eat are the pickles on their Big Macs. Oh yeah, another thing, don't plan on serving California wine at your state dinners. From now on it's imported French wine for you. Ouch, bet that hurts. Just so we're clear, the country of California will be pro-choice and anti-war. Speaking of war, we're going to want all Blue States citizens back from Iraq. If you need people to fight, just ask your evangelicals. They have tons of kids they're willing to send to their deaths for absolutely no purpose. And they don't care if you don't show pictures of their kids' caskets coming home. Anyway, we wish you all the best in the next four years and we hope, really hope, you find those missing weapons of mass destruction. Seriously. Soon. Sincerely, California
sheesh. you know, there's a TON of people, like about half, in those red states who resent bush winning, too.
I'm not an evangelical, or even Christian by common use of the word. (Oh, by the way asshole, there are plenty of evangelicals in blue states too.) I don't eat Big Macks, or any other meat product. (Oh, by the way asshole, they eat McDonalds in blue states too.) I'm not willing to send any kid to his death for an act of imperialism. (Oh, by the way asshole, there are a lot of people in blue states who supported the war too.) I do not, nor have I ever, owned slaves, I have never had the desire to own slaves and I have never known a person who has owned slaves. (Oh, by the way asshole, New England had slaves too, they just freed them sooner.) I live in Texas, and I like it here. So, for the sake of the country, would the "Blue states are better" crowd please stop being dicks. All this stereotyping bullshit is getting old. It is insulting when people spout this nonsense. I know it's a joke, and you are entitled to your opinion, but if you insult and stereotype me, and most everyone I know, because of where we live, I will exercise my right to call you an asshole. Asshole. If you want somebody to insult, why don't you insult the power-drunk deathmongers who run the government, media, and corporations of this country. Don't go after the dupes, go after the people who dupe them.
Good god when will people get it that this whole red state blue state thing is a load of crap. Here we go again. Yeah, the little joke is kind of funny but once again just feeding into an illusion. I'd like to see a letter explaining how we're not buying it anymore. How the jig is up because you can't reduce a nation of people to just two colors, let alone a few lines on a map. I'd like to see a letter telling them from a collective unified body of citizens to shove it up their ass. But I guess if people like that have it their way then they will leave anyone behind who doesn't live in their little 'blue' world. I'm with jesuswasamonkey on this one as far as seeing people for assholes when it comes to being prejudiced based on some geographical location. That is just utterly closed minded and ignorrant. Oh yeah, btw, I live in Tejas too so thanks for deciding to give me to the monsters, thanks alot, asshole.
i was in raised and lived in blue state tell 6 months ago now im in red. Actually people believe it or not there is a big difference in the way the blue and red states are ran. I've experinced this firsthand. Im not saying the people , because well theres alays a pretty good mix of everybody in ever state. I'm speaking of the politics, and government in each state. Blue and Red are very different on there priorities. Oh and just incase you guys didnt get it this is a joke i got this myself in a email right after the election , so try not attacking her, she was just posting something that is supposed to be funny. get it! ha ha ha laugh it feels good!
Yeah, I got that it was supposed to be funny. But, the whole red/blue thing only serves to keep people divided rather than unite them. That's the purpose of it so really in any capacity it's important to knock it down as quickly as it comes up. The bi(uni) party system needs to be systematicly deconstructed, not fortified. We were shown exactly what that system is capable of and I think it's high time every American that gives a damn quits with the divisions amongst ourselves. To be fair to Faerie, I realize she didn't write it and was just trying to post up something kind of funny, but really we need to think about this and how the idea behind it only serves to corrode comradery and unity. In short, it's a form of control propoganda.
Thank you.. It was a joke.. It make me chuckle... There are parts of it i dont agree with.. But im okay with politics and can laugh at them sometimes . I dont take it all soooo seriously.
for those of us being maligned, it's just not funny. i lived in california most of my life. i had more trouble with fundies banging on my door and harassing me at school and shit when i lived there than i ever did anywhere else. so that's bull. comparing washnigton and texas isn't really fair. how about comparing california and colorado? i'd say they're pretty similar, except colorado's more laid back. colorados a red state. just barely.
I mean I didn't even feel like the post was saying that everyone in the red states is an asshole. Even though I knew it was also a joke. (nobody's trying to start another Civil war, and that's what would happen if California and all those other states tried to break away from America) But if it had been serious, the tone in my opinion was really more that you can move to these states now, (we're gonna solve all problems by separating ourselves from each other) and have freedom from bush. The people in the blue states who aren't "blue" could move to bush states. In all seriousness now, probably a lot of "blue" people and "red" people would love to move to where the majority is like them(at least according to the percentage of voters). I live in a red state and I hate it because yes, the majority of people I come across here are bush supporters, and act like it. I would move to California if they were really going to be their own country. I'm probably gonna move there anyway if I ever have the money to. I want to live in San francisco where the majority of people are at least somewhat tolerant. Whats wrong with that?
quote: lived in california most of my life. i had more trouble with fundies banging on my door and harassing me at school and shit when i lived there than i ever did anywhere else. Southern Cal has got to have the highest fundamentalist population...I noticed that a lot too with all of the calvalry stuff If my state would have gone blue, and it almost did, Kerry would have won. I've got to admit one thing though, for the most part, anywhere I would want to live the most in the US happens to be a "blue" state.
i'm not moving just because half the people here have different political views. i HATE california. absolutely despise it. i don't like urban sprawl, crowded roads, overpriced goods and services, i also don't like cold, clammy weather, which is what you find in the blue states. why would i move? i like the landscape of the red states better. i like the less populated areas of the red states.
Well, I lived in Southern California too-Granada Hills if anyone knows it. I understand that there's a lot of fundies everywhere. But even then I was more likely to find a person like me than I am in Jacksonville, Florida. I'm sorry but in my experience, the Bible belt IS slightly worse than the rest of the country. I've been all over the south and the west (not the north though). I'm only one person, so I haven't met everyone everywhere, but I am speaking from my own experience. San Fransisco is the best place I've been so far, and I just love it, and everyone I met there. Never anywhere else did I like everyone I met.
i've met MANY people like me outside the blue states. i've also met MANY people like me in the bible belt. i've got some awesome friends living all over the south, georgia, tennessee, alabama. none of them are fundies, none of them are freaky rednecks or ultra conservative. the blue state lifestyle just isn't for everyone. too many people. too much traffic, too much consumerism, too much freaking smog.
quote: too many people. too much traffic, too much consumerism, too much freaking smog. but thats making an equally derogatory comment about the BLUE states.....many of them are just as rural as red ones...plus Texas is a red one, and it has the worst pollution in the country I hear. It just shows that this blue and red state thing leads to negative generalizations on both sides.....
true. and i find that rural people are typically the same everywhere, no matter which state they're in.
"true. and i find that rural people are typically the same everywhere, no matter which state they're in." LOL, me and my co-worker were talking about this today! lol I've realized I might be biased too because Jacksonville is SUPPOSED to be a this big city but it's really a small town with lots of land and people I guess I do also like the weather is san fransico, California is overpriced I'll give ya that, but so is florida so I might as well live where it's not humid lol I guess it really comes down to the people you happen to meet everywhere huh? I mean here I am saying I can't hardley find a nice person where I've been in the south and you say you know lots of cool people from there...Oh hell I'd really rather live in Amsterdam! Problem solved, I'm going to go pack right now *wink*
yes i cant tell you the smog in Texas is the worst i have ever seen. It looks like permenat fog. Its disgusting!
