Has #metoo and dating apps ruined love culture?

It's pretty simple. Each person has the power to build and strengthen the relationship. Or alternatively, tear it down.

No one can hold power over the other in a functional personal relationship. If either tries, it results in discord and either a correction or a dissolution of the relationship.

 

Think you're overthinking this. lol None of my single guy friends are worred of women accusing them of rape.

Again, the men who have been accused, are rapists. If you're not a rapist, or interested in raping a woman, you should be fine. False accusations are very rare, they are not the norm. Sure, there are women who have falsely accused men, but they are rare.

 

sounds like white people problems

 

Oh what rubbish.

 

There is a whole entire thread for that: Things that make you mad part two

 

Right, nice points there

 

It wouldn't be productive to turn it into a numbers argument. It's a risk management argument.

Again, like crossing the street. If you're hit, you'll take little comfort in being told how rare it is.

That said, we've all seen the "he said, she said" cases. Rare or not, we've seen innocent guys fighting for their livelihood over unsubstantiated allegations.

 

Were you not cautious when dating women, before #metoo?

 

Aren't most non problems? Black people are shot by the police for being black, Asian businesses are going under amid coronavirus fears, and white guys be like "wait, i can't be all rapey anymore?"

 

^I lol'd

 

That was like walking out in front of other people walking.

 

The thing is though, I'm not afraid to cross the street, because I may get hit by a car. I'm not afraid of cars. I just look both ways before crossing. I'm taking away from your posts that men should be shying away from approaching women completely even if they feel they want to, because of a few women who have presented false allegations against men. So change your entire life because you might end up in the minority like those few men?

 

Diedre - I can give you an example of a bad situation - because I was the victim.

Some years ago - WAY before #me-too - I asked a girl for a date. She seemed REALLY nice and friendly. I took her to a really very nice restaurant, had a great dinner, and went back to her house - actually her parents' house. We sat on the front porch swing and talked for quite a while, she introduced me to her mother, and all seemed to go well. I eventually kissed her good night - briefly - and went home. I wanted to go very slowly with her because I thought she was a great girl that I wanted to develop a possible long-term relationship with.

A few days later, I got a call from one of her girlfriends. Her friend asked me what the hell I was trying with her. Apparently the girl I took to dinner was telling her girlfriends that she had to fight me off - that I was "all over her." 100% bullshit. I told her girlfriend EXACTLY what the date had entailed, and that I never laid a finger on her, - which I didn't. I was trying to show her I was a nice guy, and not a creep.

I never called that girl back, never had anything to do with her again. And I thought she was a really nice girl worth trying to build a relationship with. Turned out she was a lying turd. Maybe I should have been wearing a body-camera, to disprove her false allegations???

Think of what would happen TODAY - with #metoo - and all the lawsuits, if such a situation happened now. A few scheming, plotting women can ruin it for all the other women looking for good guys. And I'm PROUD to say I'm a GOOD GUY. Been with my wife for 38 years counting our dating years, and she gets pampered every day!

 

Why wouldn't you just "take away" what I said, instead of what you believe is in my mind? :-/

 

That is what I thought you were saying. It’s your life, dude...live it as you wish.

 

Right on, bro.

That kinda shit happens a lot more than some people want to admit.

Odd thing happened to me early in HS. This girl was coming on to me, talking sex, got me to take her to a secluded location, and started petting. Getting heated she starts mumbling "no, no, no" - all while moving ahead. This really confused me. I didn't know what to make of it and hadn't developed the social skills to call her out right then and there to clear the air. I just backed off and made like we had to get back. Next day she approached me all pissed off accusing me of being a prude and making it clear she was about to get in a car with an older kid who would f__k her. Okay, whatever. I just avoided her after that.

All I can figure is she got this advertising idea that it's a lady's prerogative to change her mind and took it to the extreme. Indecisive people are a real turnoff.

 

No, I was pretty precise in what I said.
It's all still up there.
I get that it could be misconstrued.
Cheers!

 

That's a horrible story, and I'm sorry you went through that. I know there are women who lie...no one would dispute that, but I'd like to believe they're the exception, than the rule. I've dated men who have been aggressive on first/second dates, and I wasn't interested in having sex with them. I never shared those incidents with friends or my parents, etc...so it saddens me when I hear about women who outrightly lie about a situation as you describe.

 

lol I know, and I've reread it just now, and it reads as though you want all men to be overly cautious in case of ''unsubstantiated claims.'' But, false rape charges are rare, studies have shown. Maybe we're just talking past one another. It happens.

 

Speaking of #metoo...Harvey Weinstein was sentenced to 23 years in prison. Wow, I didn't expect him to get that long.