Wife shut down? It's not just sex, it is intimacy...my MM sex kept sanity

From Dr. Douglas Weiss' book, Intimacy Anorexia
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MU70ABL/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

Withholding is to not give something like a compliment, a conversation, a kiss hello, a look into the eyes, sex, and any kind of silly, playful gestures that may reference sex in any way.

Weiss, Douglas. Intimacy Anorexia: Healing the Hidden Addiction in Your Marriage . Kindle Edition.

All those years I thought it was a matter of my wife not giving me any sex...sex was a very small part of it, she was withholding intimacy, an actual condition many people had called intimacy anorexia. It finally pushed me, about 5 years ago, to actively re-engage in bisexual activity. So glad i did because it truly helped me to re-discover who I was all along.

From very, very young I truly enjoyed sex with oter guys. I am highly sexual, and sex with the guys..even without cumming, was great... and now, with the nice loads of cum to swallow it is even better.

For want of "true love" from a woman I repressed my bisexuality for over 50 years and lived through a sting of bad marriages and narcissistic women...first being my mother. Regardless of my orientation, what none of them were willing to give me was the intimacy I craved.

I left my wife over a month ago and no, when in a situation with guy, I openly admit I am bi and offer sex. So, I am now living the sexual freedom I have longed for all my life. As for intimacy, I have never truly looked at the possibility of it being with a guy...maybe if the right one came along I could switch to being gay...but, I still feel that the intimacy I crave would most likely be a woman...but would not regret some guy proving me wrong.

In any case, coming to understand this has really helped me understand who I am...and what it is I have been missing/craving.

 

For me, intimacy with a man isn't what I want. I want his cock and maybe friendship.