Stupid things couples fight about

Whose turn it is to be 'Designated Driver'

 

Where to go for dinner

 

Toilet Seat Down

 

Toothpaste

I forget if it's who left the cap off .. or where the tube is squeezed from ..

I have MY OWN toothpaste .. so don't have to worry about such nonsense

 

Put the cat out

 

We really do argue about the pronunciation of Scone as in the stone and the place in Scotland. She insists it should rhyme with moon as that's how Scots would say it. True I say but we shouldn't pronounce the s at the and of Paris as that's how the French say it. As we're not French we don't say it that way even though we perhaps should.

 

Dreams ------ Had a dream last night that you were having an affair with so and so. Are you ? It was so real that I think that there is something to it. One of her co-workers that I don't even know
For days she asked me about it. LOL She was pissed off when she woke that morning . My reply was " who the hell is that ? I don't even know her." " and besides when would I
Have the time to mess around with this person ? You are with her all day at work . And with me all evening and at night ? That seemed to have ended it.

 

Too many cats.
I tell him I never thought to marry a crazy cat lady but that's what he--yes, HE--has become.
Also his inexplicable adoration of Forrest Trump.

 

Cast your vote with a swift whisky..........
Thank me later.


Has anyone voted kids yet?






And I say scone....
Sssssss-cone (ice cream cone, traffic cone)


Seat and lid, down.

 

My wife and I fight about me walking around the house naked. I don't care if I walk past a window in broad daylight. I'm in my house! If someone sees me and gets upset, they're the weirdos for looking in my window.

 

Funny; my husband doesn't like that I DON'T go around naked.
Not that I think he's missing much.
He thinks so though.
And you're right.
It would be their shame, not yours.

 

You know what? I know EXACTLY why women get pissed about this, and I’m on their side. I’ve stumbled into the bathroom half asleep/half coherent, and let me tell you … that cold ass toilet bowl doesn’t feel good on your asscheeks, nor does that cold water feel good on you nutsack while you’re damn near getting swallowed into the bowl- it’s a horrible experience.

*Guys…put that damn toilet seat down!!!

 

It’s interesting you mentioned this because I had a squabble with my wife about this awhile back. The argument started over me drinking a beer before we were getting ready to go somewhere. I told her that it would be a good idea if she drove because I had been drinking. My wife got pissed off at me because of this, until I told her that I ALWAYS drive whenever we go somewhere, and it’s been that way for the last 9 years and that I rarely get a break.

 

Who made the last cuppa?