More and more lately, I've just been seized with incredible feelings of love and appreciation for everything and everyone around me. At first, I was mystified by the intense joy that gripped my entire life, but I realized... it's Phish. I used to be depressed and suicidal, but a year ago I started listening to Phish. At first, I was confused by the wide musical vocabulary that the band speaks (completely foreign to my pop-bred ears) but after a while, I just got it. Now, a year later, I know so much about the band, and I appreciate them so fully that the least little mention about any of the members or any of the songs sends me into rapture... I find Phish references everywhere. Whenever I open the fridge and see the milk jug, I think joyfully, "you can feel good, good, good about hood!" and drink my milk with a smile on my face. When talking to my guidence counselor, I found myself telling her that I didn't want to be a farmer, working in the sun, and nor did I want to be an outlaw, always on the run. Whenever I go anywhere, I always think, "what are the chances that I'll run into Mike? One in two-hundred million or so!" and even the small chances of that make me happier to go somewhere I otherwise wouldn't want to. I'm always saying random Phish things, like "you're goin' to JAIL!" and "my glance is always darting as I stroll the avenue"... these things just come out randomly, and as I remember a lyric or tune and hum, whistle, or sing it, I feel so glad... sometimes when I'm talking to people while listening to Phish, they think I'm stoned even though I've never even touched pot. I don't know, but I feel like heaven. Phish makes me want to help people... and when I hand out copies of Billy Breathes to people I hardly know and they ask me why, I tell them to give it a year and they'll know why. Listening to Phish is the closest I've ever come to religion -- they make me see God. I want to live and be the best person I can be since I've started listening.. what to you guys think? Am I crazy for loving Phish so much? ::sigh:: Love, love, love...
Unfortunately, my love for the band dimished quite a bit over the years. I had a similar appreciation for them as you for a good three years between 93 and 95, but after that the magic just started becoming less and less. A lot of that had to do with Trey's ego exploding, which many people up here feel is the reason for the band's demise. I probably saw them a good 70 times, but only a handful after 95. I still like their music and listen to them on occasion, but for some reason, watching a group of guys that were so tight and communicated so well on stage disolve into less than half of their former selfs because of one man's ego put me off. The guy singing the positive message wasn't living it himself. I'm not trying to diminish what their music means to you because I think its great that you get so much out of it, but for some of us who have been around them for so long and seen the end coming due to Trey's ego, that religious feeling just faded away. I can also understand the associations you make. I drive by the old Hood factory in town which inspired that song almost everyday, but I don't feel so good about Hood anymore.
The current status of the band Phish and the direction in which Trey took them can certainly bring about sad feelings, but their music lives on! Being seventeen, I never got to experience the Phish community when it was a whole. I saw nine post-hiatus, but as we all know, the scene had become over run by shady characters and was nothing compared to what it was probably like in the early 90s. Nonetheless, I still met some really good people at those nine shows. I blocked out the sketchiness and dug deep to find the true message of Phish that still lay beneath all the pollution. Phish is life. Phish is love. Phish is being positive and kind. Phish is looking into someone's eyes at a show and simply understanding how they feel because you feel it too. Phish is knowing what it is but requiring no explanation. So, when I look back on the shows I went to, they were probably not nearly as friendly or incredible as shows of years past. However, in that short period of time, I found the meaning of it and am able to take that back and apply it to my own life, much like Major Peacenik in her discovery of their music alone. Note that she never even saw a show (I think). I have become a much better person in the last few years. Worked a lot on my karma and getting things right (i.e. how I treat others, myself and the environment). THe changes in my life aren't solely on account of Phish, but I can definitely cite them as a catalyst. For that, I thank the four boys from Vermont. I spend a lot of time building up by bootleg collection trying to hear as much prime Phish as possible. Right now, I'm working on the Europe '97 tours which are sweeeeet music to my ears. I'm certainly bummed that I might not see them live ever again, but as I said before, the music lives on! Thank God for the live show trading community, what a place! Anyway, if you're ever looking for another live music community that feels a lot like family, I recommend hitting up a few String Cheese Incident shows. I've been seeing these guys since 2002 and they put on great shows in a real friendly environment. There's plenty of love to go around. Have a nice day!
You're not at all crazy. I know exactly how you feel, Peacenik, down to the last detail. I've even done the random hand-out-copies-of-Billy-Breathes thing a bunch of times. Phish got me to turn off the pop radio, forsake MTV, and listen to some actual music. In the same seemingly crazy ways mentioned before this post, they did impact my life and still do. I barely remember who or what inspired me to start listening to them. I just remember buying my first album three years ago, Billy Breathes, actually (and not to draw the same comparison that's been drawn a thousand times before, but this also was the same time I bought my first Dead album, American Beauty) and I just knew. You know what I mean? Listening to Billy Breathes, I just knew that this was something different from the pop crap my friends were listening to, I knew this stirred up something inside me that was separate from what I'd been listening to, I knew I had to get everything I could get my hands on that these guys ever did. Thank God for the show trading community indeed, or there'd be a definite void in my music library and my life. I just regret that I seem to have been born in the wrong decade. Being the age that I am, I never got the chance to see them live, for as much as I love them. Sometimes when I'm listening to Phish, that fact really sinks in-- they're gone, I missed them-- and makes me feel bad in a way I can't even put into words. The problem's exacerbated by the fact that nobody around me gets it and I don't really have anyone to relate to on the subject (which brings me back to handing out albums and shows) and I don't feel like I'd get much respect as a fourteen-year-old frequenting Phish-related message boards on the Internet. (It's also kinda why I read more than I write here as well... you have no idea of the internal conflict when I read this first post. Do I respond? Do I go on my way?) Just good knowing I'm not out here on my own, I guess.
dhs -- I take trey's ego-growth as a way humans are in general... it's just one more thing that happens to people when they get famous; it doesn't make him bad, nor does it cast a pall on my love of phish solargarlic -- you're right, I've never seen a show, but I still get that goooood feeling that spreads outward like a warm pool of light... Are you interested in trading with me? I'm trying to collect all the Harpua shows... pm me if you want to stonerbill -- that's what my friend bob said. not yet, thanks. and it's MS. peacenik roses -- ah man, billy breathes and american beauty were both my firsts of those two bands too! And I know where you are in the lack-of-respect thing... I'm in the same boat, being only 16. You seem to be very well-spoken for your age, though! I'm sure you'll accumulate respect... just keep posting! And my tape trading offer goes out to you, too... pm me if you're interested
i finally "got" it about 2 years ago. seeing those four up on stage 2 summers ago made me realize...i have finally found my place! then they broke up...and i lost what i thought i finally found. i mean trey, mike jon and page are phish...they all make phish. im bummed ill never see another phish show but im glad i saw em once. the boys definitely changed my life...and ill never forget it.
I just feel bad for the young kids around here that only got to see them once or twice... atleast you got to see them
I feel ya mama. I was the same way. I found Phish when I was 15 and everything changed for me. If it wasn't for Phish, who know's where I would have end up or what would have happend to me. You're not crazy for loving phish so much, I'm the same way. I love them, and everytime I'm sewing..I have to listen to phish!!! They make everything I create full of love, and music! !!!!Phish Rocks!!!
Never got into Phish, but I feel the way about the Grateful Dead. It was them who paved the way for Phish, and all the other jambands out there. I always thought of them as a kind of religion, and I have a few tapes where Bob Weir says "It's Sunday Sermon Time!" Right before he starts playing Samson and Deliah. =)
phish quit so they should have took a lesson from the dead (30 years) so the new kings of jam goes to the midwest's best umphreys!!!
I've been igetting more into Phish lately aswell. I listened to them lightly ever since I was younger just because my older sister has always been into them, so it rubbed off on me. Just curious what part of RI do you live it? I live in Barrington, which I hate because it's full of mostly rich jerks, and I always went to school in East Providence anyway. Im going to school in warwick right now (private, also lame).
I didn't discover Phish til I was in my 40's, and got to see them in Miami and at Coventry. When my daughter and I went to Miami, I thought "what the hell am I doing? this is so crazy" but now I'm so glad we went. Last NYE ever and those shows were so good, even if they don't compare to the mid-90's shows. Had the chance to go to Coventry too, so we did. I will always love Phish, they and their music changed my life in so many ways. I had not been so excited about music in so many years til I heard them. My daughter used to play Divided Sky all the time and after that I had to hear more. so I quested for more Phish and I'm glad I did, now that it's over.
I felt that way for Pink Floyd in the middle of 2004. i loved their music, esspecially "Time." That song spoke to me so much, and it got me out of bad times with my family. it kind of wore off, but every once in awhile, i listen to it and still think back. it's amazing.
I dont mean to bash all you phish fans here, but i never could get into them. Their music just bores me for some reason. I like some dead songs, but that tends to bore me also. I dont know why. But actuallt, Pink Floyd's the wall album clicked with me for like 2 months where I would listen to it everyday. Especially the trial.
i have been avidly lisetning to phish for almost a year and a half now, i am kinda regretting not listneing earlier, i saw them once this summer and thought it was a killer setlist, then i acquired about 10 live phish albums, and the ones that stun me the most are def. pre hiatus stuff, esp. the one in 10/18?/94 with a little bella fleck in there, its just prob. one of the best IMO ive heard!
