hey there everyone my friend has decided to stop eating bcause she wants, quote "to be able to walk into a place and say to myself i can have any pick of any guy here" unquote and im really worried about her. shes using the emotional blackmail saying that im not a good friend if i tell someone...she has done this before a few years ago before we were best friends and she recovered well witha doctors help... but now shes even started saying shes going to make herself sick even though shes not eating anything!...i mean of course i have to tell someone i know that i wont be a good friend if i didnt...i keep telling her guys that only want you for how nice your body is are just a waste of time anyway...they will only hurt her. Shes also a virgin and isnt very experienced and she feels uncomfortable with her body so i guess she wants to look good when it finally does happen for her...but what if it gets worse and she gets ill?..its difficult bcause if i tell someone i loose her as a friend...if i keep quiet and something happens to her i wont be able to live with myself
Hey If your friend has done this before and needed medical support to recover, she needs urgent help now to try to stop the awful progression in its tracks. I stopped eating when I was 20, then I flipped into bulimia. People saw what was going on but didn't know what to do, so did nothing and I suffered for 26 years before it was finally sorted out. Are you both still at school? - if so is there a teacher you can trust you could talk to? Schools are very aware of this as a problem and there will be help available. Do you know her parents well? No parent is going to be cross with you for telling them you are worried about their daughter. Is your friend normal weight now? If so, her saying she wants to make herself more attractive is likely to be a smokescreen - she is more likely to be disturbed by sexual feelings and be trying unconsciously to make herself invisible. Eating disorders are not about food, they're about control - if you feel the rest of your life is disturbing, or that you're not perfect in ways that matter to you, imposing a desperate will over your body's need for food is a way of feeling in control again. You are right to feel worried. I hope your friend has just succumbed to a temporary diet, and will soon be back on track again, but with her history you can't take the chance. She will very likely be angry with you - can you manage to love her when she can't love herself? I hope you can find someone you really trust to talk to about this. You have all my sympathy, and remember, you are doing this for love, and it is not your fault. A big hug for you, and my love.
If you know your friend's doctor (who hopefully is skilled in dealing with such a situation), then call the doctor. Then the doctor and your friend's parents can figure out how to arrange the professional help that your friend needs. (Tell the doctor to keep your "tip" confidential.) Best of luck to both you and your friend.
thank you both for such good advice...open heart youve actually mad eme make more sense of this...thanks for the love and support...i have to do what is best for her...and that is tell somone thanks again xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
