I guess it just depends on your upbringing. My very first real girlfriend and I were both virgins at 19/18 with Grandiose plans of remaining.pure, having both been raised In conservative religious households. So sex before marriage was a no no. At that time I had been indulging and self gratification for several years. Come to find out my girlfriend had been doing the same thing. with the natural progression of things, or make out sessions involved less and less clothing and more open discussions. We both confessed to masturbating. Somehow, I told her I wanted to watch. She said I could if she could watch me so we did many mutual sessions. The first time I saw her orgasm was mind blowing, And she got off watching me come. I learned a lot watching what she liked, And vice versa. Of course things progressed to oral sex, and eventually we lost our virginity. Subsequent college best friend (I was falling madly in love with her) Said she had never masturbated, or had an orgasm.WHAT? How is that possible? So things progressed, and one night I was going down on her and she had her first orgasm! Once she had slightly settled down, she said, DO IT AGAIN! Who am I to argue! I loved going down on her, but she never reciprocated. Said that she never would. So she gets off and I am frustrated. But WTH! Later on, probably months, she informed me that if I had asked, she had wanted me to take her virginity. Holy shit! But I digress. Every other LTR I was in I was fortunate to get to see that woman get herself off. My now Ex wife was really good about it. I’d either get to watch her, or if I was out of town, she would always leave steamy voicemails Listening to the buzzing of her toys, and her quite vocal orgasms was incredible. FF to my present wife, She says that she has never masturbated…. EVER! how is that possible? Well, knowing her parents like I did, I could understand that. It’s dirty and not natural. Damn religion! But fortunately, She is multi orgasmic withPIV/PIA sex. What would her religious mom think that my wife loves it up the ass?
I wished we had gotten there with girlfriend 1.0....but, we jumped right into sex. I'm thinking, watching her work herself off would have been really hot...and her watching me.....I think that may be as intimate as sex..
Very lucky and very grateful! It wasn't until years later I started to learn what others had to go through. Even today I cant imagine having to be told something that feels that good is so wrong! I think a lot of it is changing very fast. Kids these days like my little cousin can enjoy their bodies by themselves or even with a same sex friend. I always hopped just the shaming would stop but it actually seems they are getting the message its normal! I do not however want it to swing the other direction and confuse an already sexually confusing time in their lives. Gays have a tendency to over sexualize everything! Drag shows and parades are a very adult activity in my gay point of view.
My first ejaculation was in 1960 but I'd been masturbating alone and with friends for several years before that. In those days it seems that all the boys were beating off but it was taboo to talk about it. There was a stigma toward wankers. Fast forward to present day, it's a wide open topic. Even Joyce Elders, the former Surgeon General, endorsed masturbation for teens instead of having sex at that age. Two years ago on the first date with my current partner, she asked me how often I masturbate followed by several other questions. I answered openly honest but was surprised by her frankness. It's great to be able to talk about masturbation and other sexual pleasures with her. The conversation greatly improves our sex together.
Thats fantastic. I wish more people had parents like you. More kids should grow up loving their bodies and thhe things it can do rather than being ashamed or scared. We would have a better society.
Instead that is exactly what they are teaching, shame guilt and that their bodies are to be not seen or pleasured. Must be very confusing to feel something so amazingly good while being told it is so very wrong! I never hid it and if seen was greeted with a big smile and encouragement such as "that looks like it feels amazing" I also felt I could ask her absolutely ANYTHING! And I would always get an honest and truthful answer. Isn't that what we expect people to do! I clearly remember waiting for the day I could ejaculate. I practiced a lot hopping it would happen. Once it did, I ran to my mother to show her the small amount on my chest and fingers. I proudly demanded that I demonstrate my new ability. After we celebrated with ice cream all while asking her a million questions. Each one answered. Lots of people think at this point I wanted to be sexual with her in fact I did ask her a couple of times to masturbate me and once if "i could feel my penis inside her vagina" (my words as a 11-year-old.) It was purely sexual exploration. She never touched me in a sexually gratifying way. The fact is I knew I was gay even at like 5! certainly it was sexual to masturbate and ask her to. BUT to me it was seeking praise from my mom just as if I learned to ride a bike. I speak of her in such fondness because of how great full I was and am of how she raised me! R.I.P.
I'm glad I was raised by sex-positive nudists who taught me not to be ashamed of my body or what I do with it. When I started getting erections they told me it was a normal thing and not to feel like I had to hide anything, so I never did.
Your mother is unique, I hope you can fully appreciate that. My parents did not forbid masturbation, but they also did educate me properly. No one told me about wet dreams and I figured out masturbation on my own, but I never talked about it.
pish...........I don't think my parents even uttered the very word, sex, much less masturbation....nobody talked about that. You would have thought with three other brothers, someone would have given me the keys to the kingdom on that....but I had to figure it out eventually. So much lost time.
I'm right there with you. My brother was 8 years older and you would THINK that he would have clued me in at some point. All he did was let me borrow his SI Swimsuit Edition.
Nothing wrong with it at all. Everyone does it at some point. Sometimes your body just needs that release and it’s either just the wrong time for sex, or maybe you don’t have someone to have sex with. It can also be a way to experiment and find out what works for you.
There are still many cultures and religious denominations which damn masturbation as sinful, dirty and perverse and the no bating lobby is on the increase in some places and many of us who masturbate regularly and have done so for many years still feel guilty and shame. But we should not - self pleasuring is normal. (most people do it), healthy mentally and physically, reduces stress, aids better sleep, has long term benefits in preventing prostate cancer in men, increases the probability of sexual activity in later years, reduces PMT and menstrual cramps, enhances libido, leads to a better understanding of ones own sexuality and enhances partner sex. Masturbating is Good!!
In America the culture of the era that I grew up in was repressive about quite a few sexual practices. Masturbation was definitely within the top 5 of sinful, dirty , abnormal and shameful practices. When I was pre-pubescent I was punished both physically and mentally if I was caught masturbating. After puberty I was ostracized if I was caught. It's horrible that so many people's lives were negatively affected for doing something so natural, normal, safe, healthy and fun. Personally, I lived with the guilt of my masturbation habits well into my 50s. It took the internet and access to hundreds of other people that were incorrectly taught to feel shame because they liked to masturbate. It mad it so much easier to deal with the shame and guilt, once I could anonymously talk to other people dealing with the same problem. That in turn made it easier to talk openly about my proclivity to masturbate. Masturbation should not be discouraged and parents should not shame their children for doing it. They should teach their children that it is normal, natural, safe, healthy and fun, as long as it doesn't affect their normal activities and should be done in private and not take the place of normal sex. Also, that it is a good way for them to learn about their bodies and the changes that take place during puberty.
Me and my current partner are very open about masturbation and sex she has always been so with her kids as a result they are really well adjusted adults, to a point where my stepson asked his mum if I could teach how to masturbate in his late teens. A bit of a surprise as he had been reading girlie mags since he was 16.
Go girl I feel saddened for those women of whatever age who don't masturbate. If they've been brought up to consider it wrong whether for reasons of religion or parental effect, I don't get why they don't read medical research or just ask their family doctor. Ive written this before so I may suggest we make a sticky (no pun intended). Masturbation is not just something that creates an orgasm. I had a female platonic friend a few years ago. She didn't masturbate because she thought it was wrong. I explained that it's not wrong; it's a necessity. I suggested she speak to her doctor but he was a fairly old guy. She was 59 and just couldn't bring herself to discuss it with him. I went to my own doctor for an issue of my own. She is great. I told her about my friend and what I had thought. Was I correct? Partially. Not comprehensively enough. She wrote down her advice so my friend would effectively receive it from the doctor and not second hand. She said masturbation can do several things for the female body, not just orgasms. It can fend off or delay vaginal dryness later in life. Start early to best ensure that. It can help prevent loss of elasticity of the vagina. Start early to best ensure that. It can improve the lady's mood and well-being greatly and it can relieve stress. She advocated for once a day minimum with intense arousal for at least 20mins before allowing the orgasm to go off. She said I should explain it to any other women if I can. My friend had epilepsy. Seizures most days, sometimes twice. However once she began to have orgasms, beginning with help from me for a while, her seizures stopped. She went 6 wks iirc without a seizure and because we missed a day or two, she had another seizure. Consider that anecdotal, if you like, but the important takeaway is to make sure you do it daily and with prolonged arousal. As regularly as brushing your teeth. Hth.
Masturbation is beautiful, healthy and normal! I masturbate every time I have a chance throughout my day! Nothing relaxes and refreshes me more than a few minutes of loving up my penis…
So very well said fellow masturbator! We all need to be able to relax our minds and inhibitions about something so normal and natural! I’m also glad to have stumbled upon this wonderful place where I can freely admit that I masturbate often and even describe it in detail without shame or judgement! Now that I’ve shared this I’m going to masturbate for a while and let my aging body enjoy himself as long as he wants…