I created an account here to see if anyone else dealt with a similar issue and posting as I'm curious on others opinions. My wife and I have been together for 8 years and everything is going well - we don't really argue, do lots of things together and are very active in the bedroom. I travel appx. 25% of the time but she recently (within the last 6 months) started playing pickleball so it keeps her busy while I'm away, I don't play at all. She has a few friends she met at some of her match nights where everyone takes turns playing each other and she started speaking of this couple she met and sometimes on non match nights they go and practice which I've learned everybody does. She started talking about this couple to me, speaking on their outside of pickleball life. I didn't think much of this I am happy she has a new hobby and making friends. This started to change when I went with my wife to a beer fest where you can sample and buy beers. We were meeting up with this couple and a few others from her pickleball group. When we arrived and met up with them she gave the other wife a hug and her husband a hug and then introduced me. What caught my mind was the way she gave the hug and smiled. I'm not sure if this is something or if she knows them better than I assumed and it caught me off guard. I caught him looking at my wife a few times, she is 5'6, petite with brown hair and brown eyes so I don't blame him and his wife is quite good looking so what more could he need. My mind though at that time and up to this point has been wandering, since then I thought back to a few times I wouldn't hear from her after pickleball for a bit - these are evenings so instead of hearing back at 830/9 its more like 10/1030 - not a huge gap but still. There was also one time when I was away that we Facetimed as she was getting ready to go for drinks with her pickleball group. She always does herself up when going out but she was really done up for this one - it was her first invite to a pickleball social so maybe she wanted to make a good impression. Recently, we went to go get appy's and drinks with them and my wife laughed at alot of his comments, at one point when she laughed and grabbed his arm and another time tapped his quad asking him to order shots. At one point during the night his wife was telling me how lucky I am and mentioned how hot my wife was, I brought this up after we left and my wife said she thinks she's bi from what some of the other girls at pickleball have told her. Since the introduction, a few times during the NBA playoffs we have gone to their house to watch the Knicks play, my wife played basketball and is a huge fan, I'm a fan of the Knicks as well and so is this couple. We don't stay late after the game as sometimes they are on weeknights. When I'm away my wife goes over to their place to watch the games and has done so for the last 2 months. This has been a recurrence and with the playoff schedule is almost every second night. Maybe I'm in my head a bit too much but because of the laughing and touching and then the wife seemingly being flirty I'm worried they are too close. On one hand the wife of the couple seems to really love her man so I would think she wouldn't let anyone near him and on the other hand they seem a bit open. To make things worse and maybe I am overdramatic about it all, the guys name is Brad and from what I have witnessed everyone calls him Brad but in my wifes phone she has his name as "Bradley" just seems a bit strange to me. I want my wife to be happy and enjoy her hobbies, I can't ask her not to hang around this couple as nothing extreme has really happened, like I said we get along great. Do you think I have anything to worry about here or do you think she's just having fun with new people she happened to meet through something that interests her?
First, Take it at face value and don’t overreact. Question: Maybe, You ask you wife if she think the four of you could be better friends. This could into a very nice couples intimate couples play. Just saying. But both of you would have to be on board for that.
Thanks Panama Jack - I would be more open to that the other wife seems open and flirty just not to me and more my wife. We'll see. Part of the reason for posting this today as the Knicks play tonight and I am away. It just so happens that the other wife is away as well so I asked my wife what is she going to do for the game now that everybody is away. She replied that she is still going over to watch it with him and when I asked why she said why not he is her friend and they've watched every game together. The only passive roadblock I could think to put up is that I said do you think the other wife would be okay with that and she said it was her idea. So I don't have much clarity on this and they will be hanging out in T-6 hours..
I can understand why you are a bit apprehensive(concerned) about this. You don’t want to come off as jealous but…. Concerned is a better way to approach her.
