What is your definiton of Bi?

Yeah, I agree that it shouldn’t be that complicated. I’m definitely not in denial of my bisexuality but don’t know if I’m eligible to wear that label. I’m just not sure if I’m truly bi. I only have feelings for women but can definitely appreciate a good looking penis and man ass.

 

"Feelings" are different from sexual behavior, and bisexual behavior does not necessarily mean having biamorous feelings.

 

But bisexuality can include those feelings; it's not all about the sex but it's the more well-known aspect of bisexuality.

 

Yes, people who engage in any type of sexual activity can have amorous feelings or not.

Many married men who repeatedly have sex with other men defensively claim that they are not bisexual because they do not have amorous feelings for their male partners. In reality, all they can really claim is that they are not bi-AMOROUS. Bisexuality just means that you engage in sex with men and women, whether or not you happen to have amorous feelings for them.

Similarly, men who only THINK about having sex with both women and other men are bicurious at best, because they are not involved in actual sex. Once they start getting it on with men and women, they are then involved in bisexual behavior. And, if they graduate from having amorous thoughts about both men and women to actual amorous behavior, then they are the involved in bi-amorous behavior.

Let me put this in basic behavioral terms. When you go to a STD clinic, the working definition of bisexual is having actual sex with both men and women. Being bisexual for a very long time, on the occasions when I've gone to a STD clinic, I just tell the clinic workers the truth. The subject of feelings never even comes up. They want to know about my sexual behaviors, not whether I "self-identify" as straight or bi.

I never went through a bicurious stage, because I was seduced by a man before I ever even seriously thought about it. I don't regret that a bit. I started having sex with both men and women, and soon a no-BS clinic worker explained that this sexual BEHAVIOR is called bisexuality.

 

Well, no - clinicians don't care if you were in love with the guys you had sex with - did you have sex with them and how did y'all do it? Let's draw some blood and would you mind peeing in this cup? Cool. Just a little pinch... and would you mind opening your mouth so I can swab the inside of it? Thanks.

And you're right; a lot of guys who have sex with guys will tell you that they feel nothing but lust for them and... they're not always telling the truth about that but I get it since for as long as I can remember, if you have romantic feelings for a guy, um, that means you're gay. It's bullshit, of course, but a lot of guys... in 2025... believe that tired-assed lie that was created to protect one's masculinity. "I'm not attracted to men" means that one isn't attracted to men like they are to women - and that one's even way older than I am - to which I say, "Who says you have to be?".

You like men. You like women. You have sex with both, and you can be romantic with women and men if that's how you're feeling. The medical profession really doesn't care if you love one, the other, or both; if you're having sex with men, you need to be routinely checked out and that's that. But when you leave your checkup with a bandage on your arm and your bladder emptied, how do you feel about your FWB, hmm? And does it matter to anyone other than yourself how you feel about him?

If you have feelings for a guy that isn't just lust, it's okay and does not ever make you any less of a bisexual... but, again, it's the sex that people pay the most attention to.

 

To me it's all about the sex. I don't have to have love or emotional attachment to the person I'm having sex with. I've have sex with who I could hardly stand to be around but the sex with them was great. I have sex with a male friend and it's great also. Heterosexuals enjoy sex only with the opposite sex. Homosexuals enjoy sex only with the same sex. Bisexuals like me enjoy sex with both sexes.