8 months in...am I doing something wrong?

So I started my dread journey like many do, I went to the popular dreadhead websites and bought their products and backcombed, put in rubber bands and waxed the hell out of my dreads. After about a month, if even that long, I realized the error of my ways and stripped the wax out and have gone the natural route since. This was in January. I know that dreads are a journey and they have already taught me many things. I guess that this is more of a vent/whine than anything because I am going through a stage where I feel like that I am waiting and waiting and not seeing any progress. Some of them have fallen OUT if anything (rather than dreading up over time). I feel like when I wear my hair down that you can't tell that I even have dreads so instead I just look like a nasty nappy chick who never brushes her hair.

Can any of you weigh in and tell me if they look like they should after 8 months or if there is something more that I should be doing? Or at least just give me encouragement to keep waiting?

 

look good for 8 months when you haven't done much to them since the wax incident. did you melt the wax out with hot water and a deep cleanse (recipe can be found in the "stickies")? also, you hair is short, so it may not have enough length to knot up, esp. at the tips.

 

Ahoy ... Man, I know so little about the results of the backcombing / waxing approach.

But, what I would like to ask you is what your washing routine is ... i.e. what do you wash your hair with ... how often do you wash your hair ... etc. ... ?

 

There is no 'way they should look' at a certain time, they are just how they are. They will lock up, you just have to be patient

*Gives encouragement to keep waiting*

Well, instead of wait, forget about them Forget you want/have dreads and the time will fly by. Ignore them. You may have to rip separate them every week or so, but ignore them otherwise The time (not that there is any set timeline or anything) will fly by ^^

Reeellllaaaaaaaax ^^

 

there is definitely progress there. the hair looks to be grouping up nicely.. some people that go natural dont see significant progress until a year in or more, so i think you're right on track iggy:

 

Like others have said, there's no way of saying what dreads should or shouldn't look like at 8 months. Dreadlocks are as individual as fingerprints.

You can definately see that they are dreadlocks though. But yeah forget about them, progress isn't noticeable til you upload an update and it's like "holy hell!" Take pictures every couple of months and save them so you can see for yourself that they are making progress.

 

Hi! Welcome!! Your hair looks almost identical to mine! I too have had many dreads "fall out" and I simply T&R'd them with much bette results.

I think if we had blond hair that they would look much more natty and dread like, but dark hair seems to hide them compared to blond hair.

What would you like your hair to look like? Do you want the more standard rope like looking dreads? If so, you can rebackcomb the ends or T&R to help them further along. I personally love my rats nest. =) I found a natural timeline last week that was four years of dreading and showed it ot my hubby. He was sad that my dreads would take until about year two to look like what he expects them to, but alas, it's my head and my luverly dreads!

 

As for washing...I don't wash very often. Sometimes I swim in the pool or lake and shower off with just water and let dry. If I do wash with shampoo, I still have some of the stuff I got from the dreadhead site that isn't supposed to leave residue.

Does anyone have any recommendations for washing that I am missing?

 

I did not like the dreadhead soap. I found it left my scalp gunky. I just use baking soda and water now to wash. Sometimes I do a deeper cleanse by adding tea tree oil to the mixture and letting it sit on my hair for a half hour or so.

Btw, the kiddo is WAY cute!

 

Slabobbin, there are a few here who just use water to wash their hair. A few also use Dr Bronner's shampoo etc etc. My opinion is if shampoo is going to be used to clean hair then the hair should be washed once a week. Clean hair dreads better. But it's really up to you and what you feel is right for your hair.

 

If you really wanna push it, try a lil twist and rip, but other then that, best advice is to just wait, natural locks take years to look like real locks

 

Ahoy ... OK, I'm totally for the 'section and matt your locks over time through a specific washing routine' approach. Everyone has different approaches though and whatever one feels comfortable is best. For sure, some peeps don't even dig shampoo. I took the 'no shampoo neglect ' approach with my first load of locks quite a few years ago, but I found that the results of the washing method works beater for me.

One thing I would recommend though, is don't do the swimming thing, not until you have mature locks ... as your hair is knotting up, you are un-knotting it by swimming, so it’s like taking one step forward, one step back.

PS. If you are interested in trying the washing method, PM me and I'll run through it ... I think I've blabbed about it enough times in a very short period to bore people to death.

 

first of all swimming is rad for locks... especially in the ocean, but lake and rivers are cool too... what makes you think that water and/or swimming will make hair un-knot?
Also, I would like to hear the reasoning behind your stocking cap washing routine. Like most things people do to their locks, it sounds like a bunch of unnecessary foui to me.

 

My hair is curly and it looked pretty similar to yours at 8 months (ie, not blatantly obvious that I had dreads). I'm almost at a year now and there has been some progress. I would recommend washing once a week and trying baking soda to deeply cleanse...(not saying you have it, but) if there's any buildup in there, it will slow the dreading process...the baking soda gets it out better than anything.

 

I'm going to be very straightforward here, so please don't be hurt.

First off, clearly your hair IS dreading. I have the intuition that you are being too hard on your hair in terms of having a strong expectation that you believe is not happening. You said something about your hair looking like a ratty mess (or something like that). I believe that if you are comfortable with having dreads, you need to let go of your pre-conditioned beliefs about what the "right" look is. Yes - dreads, unless they're fake, highly maintained (crocheted, for example), etc. ARE something of a "ratty" look. And sometimes they are VERY ratty looking. That's why so many people equate dreads with being "dirty." (Shame upon their ignorance!)

By the way, I have found that, especially for the first months, washing my hair every 3 days actually helps the locking process. The oilier your hair is, the less likely it is to lock up.

Namaste

 

Ahh if i had a dollar for every time someone asked me if i could "wash em?"

lol

 

Thanks everyone! I meant no disrespect about the rat's nest comment...it was only a personal reflection. My journey with dreads is multi-dimensional...I wanted to grow as a person and I knew that dreads would be a journey for me. I knew that they would teach me. I also think that they look cool as hell...I love the look of them. I know, on a logical level, that it will just take time and nothing more. This is more of an emotional thing. Things are stressful in my life right now so I it is probably natural that I am getting impatient with my dreads.

I will try washing them more and doing the baking soda and vinegar thing. Thanks.

 

just don't worry about them to much Slabobbin.

The sooner you stop caring.. the sooner you will notice results

 

I had a similar experience with wax and all - you can see some pics here for comparison...FWIW I think your hair looks great :cheers2: http://mamamojo.wordpress.com/2008/07/15/the-dreadlocked-mess-momster/

 

Ahoy ... Wow Sister, Checked the link and I just cannot believe the mission that you have had to go through ... Respect to you for getting through it all. It's absolutely terrible what you have had to do to undo someone else’s mess. It's insane comparing the first pics after the work was done to your last once the work was undone … Heavy!

But the results you are getting now are awesome …