A question for the ladies

Ladies, If you can tell a guy is into you in a big way and you like him but he's weird and akward through chronic lack of confidence do you like him and think it's endearing or do you dislike him and think he's a loser?

 

i wouldnt think he was a loser, altho i dont have time for weird people who lack confidence, so id tell him nicely that im flattered but im not into him that way

 

^^I agree. I have confidence in myself and I don't have time to be trying to boost someone elses constantly...I was in a relationship with a really self-conscious person and I felt like I was the guy in the relationship...didn't really enjoy that too much

 

The situation 'my friend' is in he hasn't asked her. What would you do if he suddenly plucked up the courage to ask you out after you've known him a while. I mean is there a situation where you'd want a guy to ask you out and wait until he did even if it was a few yrs?

 

I wouldn't think he's a loser, but I will admit that a lack of confidence is annoying. I can't stand it when guys are awkward and don't know what to say or do. It's just completely unattractive to me.

 

neither. they love him as a girlfriend.

i'm not a girl, but no. a vast majority of women refuse to consider a relationship with anyone who is not a complete stranger.

 

well if I liked him I think it would be cute.

 

but you wouldn't like him, so this is a non-point.

 

chronic lack of self confidence isn't attractive. Why would it be? However, a lack of self confidence that comes from liking a girl so much that it makes a guy nervous can potentially be cute. It really depends on if the girl is initially attracted to you though, and most of the time both guys and girls are attracted to confidence

 

^ Not true for me at all, I tend to be attracted to timid, shy girls.

I don't exude much confidence, but I am confident in my abilities. Never really given a chance though.

 

same. on both points, although only the first is really relevant.

 

I've got a question for the Ladies... Why do you ignore I'minmyunderwear? How can you hate this face!?!

So I implore you! Give the guy a chance!

 

if you want replies, you should start a thread and butcher your spelling. like this:

eyev gotta qweston. ladys, wud u slep sexxy wiht hits pinis?

 

touche

 

lololol

 

I wouldn't find it endearing. I wouldn't find it repulsive either. The thing with people..each individual is capable of great things, and bad things. Some lack confidence, some are too cocky. Some have no sense of humour and some take nothing seriously. Each person comes with problems. So as an intellectual you have to decide which problems you can handle in a significant other, what is your personal preference. If you had to choose which one. Or would you choose not to pick at all.
To just be ambitious, take each infatuation as what it most likely is.. a very overwhelming feeling of love,lust and compatibility but ultimately a phase.
This is just me maybe.

But if I could choose to be eliminated from this process I would. I know what it feels like to be completely absorbed with a person. To see no flaws in them. Not that they don't have flaws just that they don't matter because all of the good things outweigh the bad.

But for me it's brief, it's so beautiful but it dies.
The point is.. no matter what baggage you've got going on. Big or small. There's one person out there who won't care because of all the amazing things about you.

It's not about mass preference. But how long it will last with the few who decide to take on your problems as well as their own.

And I applaud people who can be with others. I just don't see how anyone could make that feeling last forever.

I choose brief and meaningful encounters with many instead of one. Primarily because I can't keep the fire alive. And maybe not all of us are supposed to.

The thing is though. You really don't have a reason to be insecure. Because everyone is the same but different. You're connected to everything. You're not this seperate person who means less. You are equal and ultimately capable of doing anything you want to.

A lot of people are insecure for their own reasons. They don't, upon learning that they are insecure, jump to change. This is because they want to be loved for who they are. Whatever it is that is making them insecure whether it be physical appearences or they haven't accomplished enough etc.

But you don't have to be anyone. You really can do whatever you want.

 

Agree and feel the same way.

 

It's a two way street, most girls think this way but its all just another way of saying they want the male to take all the iniative so they don't have to. confidence is a BS term chicks use so they don't have to go and approach guys themselves. Females (usually) at first, are much worse and much more awkward at conversation than males in my experience.

It's true, women like outgoing, confident, social guys. the problem is that they end up complaining about how he treats them like shit a few months later, while the guy with the "lack of confidence" is wondering how he can find a girl to cherish and love.

 

Actually, I dated a guy for 2 years that was very very passive. Through that I learned, for me, it has nothing to do with their lack of ability to approach me. It's simply a huge turnoff. Grow some balls. Why are you intimidated because I'm a girl? We're adults here. Just make conversation if you want to. It's really not that big of a deal. And it goes the same the other way. If I want to make conversation, I do. I feel like I kind of outgrew that "OMG, I wish that guy would talk to me." phase a long time ago. It's childish, IMO.

 

To be honest, ive had guys like this in the past ask me out, but i have not been attracted to them in that way, not because they lack confidence or are some what weird, geeky or what ever, its just... well... i wasnt attracted to them, i cant do much if i dont want to be with someone, it wouldnt be right for me to say yes, just to boost their confidence.

But id have to find a way of letting that guy down with out hurting him