Apparently I'm too calm, too cooperative,

too nice, too intelligent, too aware, too honest, too much of a model individual with the whole in mind, so to speak.


And it is the exact oppossite of these things that get you power, or respect.

Not only that, all the traits mentioned result only in having people overlook the shit out of you, and take it all for granted.


Really world? Fuck u.

/what I have learned (through various sources, interpersonal communication theories, and what appears to be the truth).

:book: = :ack2:

 

Yeah...

Here's a shovel, let's start diggin your grave, mate.


Oh wait - fuck that.
If people are overlooking you because you are too intelligent and too aware, they are the ones that you should be walking all over. Add 'Too Self-Conscious' to the list, man. If you are really too much of all these things, get rid of the self-consciousness and start projecting yourself into the world in a productive, positive manner - as in, add to the hive.

 

too self-conscious is definitely on the list (how do you think one becomes too aware?). Being too humble also crosses out the power-gain from alleged intelligence (But it's beyond the point -- I'm not really trying to argue my intelligence. Minor detail of big picture).


But alas, I don't want to "walk all over people" -- why is that even a focus? I thought we were all supposed to just get along... but apparently I missed that memo.

* no really. Like, I never thought of it that way, and I don't want to. But it's becoming seemingly clear that's how shit works.

 

maybe not walk over people

but the social ladder is just that - a ladder. there are people you will pass climbing up

 

don't forget too psychic. my mind was blown when i read that quote before the post that was quoted.

 

I don't think I can *get rid* of the self-consciosuness. I am, at 26 years old now, a very self-conscious person and I must enjoy it to some extent to always remain curious of everything around me.

Jiving with the hive becomes hard as fawk though, as you imagine, and with a strong personality + self-consciousness I now feel and believe it eventually drives people away. Or at least puts me in my own high-energy self-conscious box that people can engage 1 on 1.

I usually befriend many people fast and easily, but the return is rarely to the extent that I put out or truly want back. I think every personality combination has its strengths and weaknesses - this one is my bitch.

 

carpe the diem or something, homie.

you can't let yourSELF hold you back. we all struggle with it, but when you are as nice as you say you are, you are doing other people a disservice to not assert yourself in a way that you wish to be viewed

 

I don't like being around people who don't care about anything. They might as well be robots.

I also don't like being around people who are passionate about everything. They expect you to boycott all the things that they do. I have to enjoy my life too.

 

wow...way to toot your own horn! :tongue:

there's nothing wrong with you. Power and respect come to everyone who deserves it...it might just be from a different crowd

 

I only agree partially. It depends on the kind of power you want or what kind of respect you get. Do you crave for such power and respect? If not, what's the problemo?

 

Thanks for the positivities. :daisy: I have lately been adding assertiveness, over assumed mutual consideration or passiveness for the sake of the other, so to speak. It's been interesting. I still think someone naturally aggressive is going to garner more respect than someone naturally calm or passive, but is assertive when need be... but hey, that could be a bit of paranoia + you can't have everything.

It's le weekend so we'll see how I socially groove once again. :afro:

 

There are so few people in between...

 

Nah, there's plenty. The rest of them just need to turn it down a notch and they'll be fine.

 

In my experience most people are in between those two extremes. Maybe it's just projection?

 

The perfect combination is called "clarity". Be comfortably clear that your verbal communications truly match your thoughts and your emotions. Have enough control and acceptance of your thoughts and emotions that you can express yourself verbally with ease. If either of those variables cause you anxiety, then analyze why. Don't hold back....let your personality flourish and be represented. Some of it is a simple matter of maturity.

 

Respect only really matters if it comes from yourself or someone you value.

And power.. I don't see what's so great about it. It's usually just used for someone to be a dick to someone else. Maybe being nice and powerful are mutually exclusive? Why do you want power, anyway?

 

you seem like you're forcing yourself to be social, at least to me

you already said that you hate the 'game' and find it ridiculous, but to me it looks like you keep playing it

i think people will respect you if you respect yourself: don't do what you don't want to, say everything you think, don't laugh if you don't find it funny, screw what other people think

i am talking from my experience, if you don't do only what you want (known also as 'being yourself'), you'll end up with people who don't like you for who you are, you know, they'll like that social and outgoing you, but maybe that's not the real you ... maybe you just like cooking or shit

that's the key ^

if you're really that stuff you're saying and don't really like socializing, don't push yourself,

know yourself, find out what you really like doing, and do it

friends who can really relate to you will come along then ... i think true friends are those who come without effort, you know, naturally

that also applies to girlfriends: if you don't really like going out at night, you'll never find a girl who you can really relate to in those places ... i mean, a one night thing you can find, but a girl that you can like 'feel a connection' and shit, you won't...

but that's just my opinion ... be yourself