at war with myself, important question

The adult in me and my inner hippie are at each others throats. And it's killing me quickly!!! I'm 24, I live on my own, I have no kids, no loving pets, no boyfriend, and a dead end job. And anything I'm interested in doing with my life as far as work, career etc will not do well or progress in Jacksonville. The sunniest days are gloomy here in Jacksonville where they most definitely fear change and unity. The adult in me fear failure in the unknown world outside Jacksonville, when the hippie and me have already realize I have failed here and desperately want to try elsewhere. How do I go about moving to another state or city?? Following my dreams and the reality of giving up the little I have to MAYBE gain or lose it all is at a standoff. What to do?

 

I'm almost 25, just married, and I was living in your situation at one point.
Living alone at 24, working in the medical field, trying to get by.
First off, pay any and all debts.
Then get yourself a small savings.
Above all else follow your dreams, do what feels right to you, not what other people think you "should" do.

 

Well thanks to you I know I'm at least going in the right direction

 

I read a quote on a skate shoe the other day (I'm hoping I remember this right):

Those who advise you not to take risks are not living their lives to the fullest.

C/S,
Rev J

 

You have to find the happiness in yourself. That way you carry it with you.
If you don't like your circumstances, you can either try to change them or adapt to them. You are the only one who can decide which is better.

 

No matter where you go...there you are! Moving somewhere else will only work if there is something there for you! At a young age your abilities should override your passions, at least for the moment. That's because you don't seem to have identified what your passions are yet. I agree with Sappho that you should get some funds put away first, and while you do that, sit down and have an honest talk with yourself and pinpoint your strengths. Then exploit them. Doing so should put you in a more secure position in life, and from there you will find it's easier to pursue that "Hippie side" of yourself. Nothing wrong with having two sides to ones self, but one usually supports the other. Kinda like Clark Kent and Superman. So don't worry about the 'where', concentrate on the 'who' until you work out some of the "what'. And it's always better to work from a position of affluence then from one of need.

 

So how are ya almost 2 months later?

 

Never, never, never give the power over your life to another. Rather, consider that you haven't considered the unlimited possibilities you have limited for yourself. At 24, you have huge options.
That dead-end job can fuel many things. Save and buy a motor-home, then travel to a place you have researched. Or buy college classes ( the options that can rise up and challenge you in college can change what you think you want now!)
Love is great, but it's not a boyfriend you're looking for- it's a MAN who needs love too, and dreams the same dream. A partner in more than one passion, and not someone who takes care of you.
You need to find a passion-is it art? is it music? is it social-service?
Pursue the passion and you will find others who have the same-even in Florida.
The Great Hippie Mistake was in thinking Dumbo needed a feather to fly.
The movement was trashed by drugs and booze.
You are real. Real people don't need role-models. And "HIPPY" was a bunch of kids in the 60's and 70's who thought they were being different when they all wore flowers and jeans, and conformed to their group!
You are free, but until you examine your own limits and get rid of them, you will never be really free to choose, nor will you see the unlimited field of possibilities.
I am an ageing hippy, yes. But I don't know it all. Consciousness changes with experience, and I have more experience to go.
A passion is important. My passions have been my direction, and the encounters they led to has helped me to grow-and will.
peace,mo

 

Hahaha - more truth there than Carter has pills. Except for the part about hippies. There are plenty of hippies now, not as many or as public as before, but hippies/beautiful people, nonetheless. There are some very good, very psychedelic things happening. And there you are, pretty close to the epicenter.

But I really would pay attention to what Mo said. Apply it in concrete ways, like cancelling non-essential stuff like cable tv, getting rid of credit cards, really cut back and bear down for a year and you'll probably have enough to get to anywhere.

AND, at the same time, assess yourself and understand what you need to do to get to where you need to go (within yourself).

Happy Trails!

 

I wouldn't want to live in a town that hosts the terrible Jaguars either. >.>

 

THE MAN THAT I AM MET THE BOY THAT I WAS
AND THE TWO OF THEM TALKED TOGETHER
NOW I REGRET THAT THEY EVER MET
THEY COULDNT AGREE ON THE WEATHER
THEY COULDNT AGREE ON THE TIME OF DAY
THEY COULDNT AGREE ON THE NIGHT
IN FACT THERE WASNT ONE THING
THAT ONE COULD SAY THAT THE OTHER WOULD SAY WAs right
IM A BIRD, IM A PLANE THE LITTLE BOY SAID
WATCH ME AS I FLY
THE OLD MAN FRAWNED, SPIT ON THE GROUND
AND SAID NOW BOY THATS A LIE
THE LITTLE BOY STOOD THERE IN FEAR AND AWE
AND CRIED BUT YOU KNOW THAT ITS TRUE
YOU WERE RIGHT THERE AND I KNOW THAT YOU SAW
HOW FAR AND HOW FAST THAT I FLEW.
SO THUS HE HEARD THAT HE WASNT A BIRD
AND THEY PROVED THAT HE WASNT A PLANE
AND ALTHOUGH HE TRIED AS WE ALL HAVE TRIED
THAT LITTLE BOY NEVER FLEW AGAIN
RIGHT FROM THE START THEY STOOD APART
THEY NEVER SAW EYE TO EYE
THE LITTLE BOY WITH INNOCENT JOY
AND THE OLD MAN WHO COULDNT FLY
SO YOU OLD MEN HOLD ON TO THE JOY
THAT IF YOU LOOK YOULL FIND ALL AROUND YOU
FOR IT TAKES ONLY ONE COLD HARD FACT
TO THROW A DREAM OFF TRACK
AND DISTROY THAT LITTLE BOY WHO FOUND YOU.

IM AN OLD HAIGHT ASHBERRY HIPPIE AND THIS IS THE EVE OF MY 71
BIRTHDAY AND I AM STRUGGELING WITH THE SAME THING YOU ARE
MY YOUNG HIPPIE FRIEND THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME PUT TO VERSE
WHAT IM FEELING IN MY OLD HEART. IT WILL GET ME THROUGH THIS NIGHT HANG IN THERE LOVE MIKE BEDELL
I DONT REPRESENT BUT I AM A MEMBER OF THE CHURCH OF THE GOOD EARTH. WE HAVE A WEB SITE HERE ON HIP FORUMS CHECK US OUT AND FEEL FREE TO JOIN US OLD HIPPIES

 

Well I have the savings up and going doing really good on that. Still paying off debt, nothing too serious though. N still trying to figure out something with school and work. So I guess I'm still just playing the waiting game. I do love that you guys are just as realistic as I am. I was for sure that someone would be like just jump off the cliff, kick up some dust and go, go, go. Unfortunately for me this is reality and not some games. Great advice I'm listening you're not speaking to deaf ears

 

deaf

not death lmao

 

Lol Deaf u know Wat i mean