Well I didnt know where to put this thread, so here looks good. I am not really sure what causes this, but often I have consuming thoughts about driving my car very fast into an on coming car. For instance, yesterday I was driving down the highway (65 mph speed limit) around 5 or 6 pm. Some reason I had an urge to speed up to about 120, constantly thinking about crossing the center line and just crushing whatever comes at me. Its even gotten to the point where I hope for a dump truck or semi or something big, to just take me out. I dont really think it has to do with a fascination with death, but Im not quite sure why I get these feeling. Another intersting thing is why I havent done it yet. There have been plenty of opertunities where I could have, but something doesnt let me steer across the line. Sorry for the kind of long read, but any input would be great. Thanks
It's like the time I was on the Cliffs of Moher in Ireland, and I pondered how easy it would be just to fall off the edge. There's a difference between flirting with death and just recalling how quickly our death can come upon us. As long as you are just recalling the preciousness of life, that's okay. But if you are actually hoping for death, you might want to talk to a pastor, or a friend, or a therapist, or a guru.
I once knew someone that would get thoughts and visions like this. He was a complete psychopath. You may want to seek professional help.
Is it worse to fantasize about your own death or about killing other people? I often fantasize about killing certain people. The fantasies are very detailed, more like plans than fantasies. I plan out the way I will kill them, where, when, everything. I will sit there and watch someone I don't like and just kinda stalk them. Literally making plans to kill them. Even going so far as to buy new clothes and shoes to wear when I do it, because I need to have clothes nobody has ever seen me in so I can throw them away and if someone sees it happen, they won't be able to tell it's me because I will have a mask on and be wearing new clothes that nobody has ever seen me wear or will ever see me wear. Damn, that was a long sentence. Anyway, am I the only one that does that shit?
I agree with pomunus. If it's a desire to die, you have to realize you're taking someone else down with you that way. EVEN IF it's a semi or a dumptruck the poor fucker driving it will have your death, or serious injury on his/her conscience. Don;t do it that way, wrap yourself around a post or drive off a bridge. Is it unusual, i don;t think so. The fact that much of the living has become removed from our lives I think many of use desire danger. IRT topnotchstoner I've contemplated how to dispose of people, but I've never gone out and bought new clothes over it. I suggest lithium.\, or professional aide. That is if you value the people around you or have a belief that even the people we hate in life may have people who care about them. You know it's Variation on the same theme with both of you, PEOPLE MATTER TO OTHER PEOPLE. Even hobos or homeless people, they have families somewhere. I know, my father's been on the streets more times than I'd like to know. There are no islands, there are no actions without consequence. Grow up, and have a bit more value for yourselves and the other apes we live with.
That is of no consequence. If I have a problem with an individual, a real problem, like when I actually hate them, then I have a problem with their friends and family. Fuck em.
I dont think I wrote that correctly. Its not so much the fact of death or killing other people that I think about, its more of what would happen if I did. What would be on the news, what would be said afterwards, how would I be remembered. Things like that.
