Death of Infidelity

EDIT: Death OR Infidelity

I had this convo with my woman a while back and figured I'd ask here also.

She said she'd prefer I was cheating on her or etc rather than losing me through unexpected death. To me, the reverse would be more painful. I think it would be less painful to me if she died than if I was totally wrapped up in her and found out she was cheating on me.

Mind you I have never been cheated on or had anyone close to me die before so don't really know what i'd feel either way.

BUT..... If she died, at least I'd know what I had with her was real. If she was cheating on me and lying to me, it would be like all the time I had with her was a lie and wasted when I could have been with someone else. Would also be like all the care I *thought* she had for me was fake and not real.

I think maybe her view on it is more selfless than mine or possibly more mature but I am pretty damn sure it would be less painful to lose her to death than her cheating on me. That would rip my soul out.

Also maybe it's a male/female thing, i don't know...

 

so you'd rather she be dead than to have to go through an emotionally painful experience that most people get over?!

 

Let me be clear.

The question was - what would we each consider to be more painful. And yes, to me, betrayal is worse than death. I'd rather die than betray her. So what's the difference? And most people say that but very few actually mean it...

 

how would you know since neither has happened to you?

and i think you can infer the answer to your question in my first post.

 

Well... the only other woman I loved, years ago, lied to me repeatedly. It was drugs she was lying about though. That hurt more than I've ever hurt in my entire life. Especially when the level of the lies became more clear. So I guess I have experienced betrayal before. Just not of the cheating variety. I've broken a lot of bones and had a lot of severe injuries over the years and nothing compared to the pain that woman caused me.

That's part of the reason why I wanted to ask though - since I haven't experienced these things myself.

And yes, I'd rather lose her to death - a force that is most of the time uncontrollable, chaotic, just part of the universe we live in, and going to happen to all of us anyways - rather then her CHOOSE to do something that would totally betray me and hurt me more than anything else was capable of.

Would you rather live a couple decades more if you could lie you way into it?

 

i wouldn't have to lie my way into living longer. i don't cheat when i am in a relationship.

so, like i said, you'd rather she be dead than cheat on you.

 

Yeah that's the whole point of the thread - why are you being a dick about it?

 

lmao cuz you're a dick, ya dick!

 

Well i KNOWWWWWWWWWWWW that bitch! Answer me something useful!

 

That's kind of harsh. But I guess it is safe to assume you've never lost someone you loved with all your being to death. I had a situation in which I got to experience both. I can tell you right now, the cheating hurt a LOT less than death. A LOT.

 

this is a non-issue for me, as i naturally prefer dead women.

 

Cheating doesn't mean they don't care about you, it means their a slut. Losing somebody when your deeply in love with them is going to hurt alot more.

 

This.

I was cheated on, and it hurt a lot. However, I would much rather that than have them die on me

 

Yeah - I don't know why but it just seems like it would be a lot easier for me to deal with - I'm not sure why I think that but I do.

 

I was madly in love with someone that cheated on me once. He broke my heart, but I'm pretty happy he's still alive. I got over him cheating on me and moved on. If he died I would always be that girl whose boyfriend died and never got over it.

 

When we were kids we used pose questions like: "would you rather have you right testicle slowly crushed in a vice or have a hot nail shoved into the hole in your cock?"

I could never think of the right answer

 

I think it really depends on the kind of relationship one has. If you really love her deeply and she is cheating or dies, it is going to hurt a lot. Which one is going to hurt less? I think cheating is going to a hurt ones own ego a lot more than death. I think once we stop thinking about one self, and think about the consequences and impacts to others affected as well, then cheating might not be as bad.

I am not an expert here, but I do not think that women see cheating the same way men might do. If women cheat, it is usually because they do not love you, so death is extreme, when men cheat, it is usually for sex not for love so cheating seems harder to deal with.

 

They are different kinds of pain. Being cheated on gives the pain of betrayal, envy, humiliation and, definitely, also sense of loss and grief; but it is nothing like the devastating and protracted loss and grief one feels from the death of a loved one.

The trouble is that the horrible sick feeling we get from being cheated on we can all imagine, we all hate it. Therefore we think we prefer loosing a loved one to death rather than to cheating, because we can't imagine the deep and devastating grief from death unless we have been through it.

 

I would rather you die when your girlfriend cheats on you. That way you are spared the agony of knowing.

 

lmao