Having a bi wife. Are you cool with it? (merged)

In the beginning, I always encouraged f/f play, thinking I could be in the middle. Typical male attitude.
Then I encouraged my wife to experiment because I thought she would enjoy it.
I always noticed she scrutinized the photos in my old porno mags, over the years and has surfed my porn site history, when I wasn't around. When we made love and I had been giving her oral, I would go up on her and try to kiss her. Early on, she resisted, then she gave in and allowed me to share the wonderful flavor and wettness of her pussy. Then she used to kiss me and savor her wettness on my face, even tasting her fingers after being deep in her.
I still had the fantasy of being in a FFM threesome, but there was no room for a man in her new adventure with another woman who felt the same way.
I am happy to allow her the pleasure of sharing herself and enjoying her special friend, without my interference.
As it was for me, her bi adventure is also a convenient one. There are no deep involvements, just sexual pleasures. After they enjoy themselves in the exercise room they either relax in the hot tub or shower together, then her friend goes home to her husband and family.
There is big difference in her general attitude. She seems so much more laid back, relaxed and looks at things with a new positive outlook.
Life is too short to waste it being miserable.
I am happy to see her as happy as she is.

 

bi-curiosity is or isn't in a person. but you can definitely be happy for breaking down any barriers or fears she had for the whole thing. well done.

 

Welcome back

 

Most guys would love to see their lady with another woman and hopefully be in the middle of the scene. Truth be, they really don't want or need a man interfereing in their moments together.
Would you be cool with letting your lady enjoy herself with another woman, without your involvement? I'm glad that my wife has discovered the pleasures of another woman. Since she has, she has a new aura about her. Almost like she just got back from a nice vacation.
How many women would like to enjoy this kind of open relationship and still maintain your marraige? I would rather see my wife enjoying and sharing with another woman, then going through life denying herself of the joy.

 

Been there.....but...not much into being watched...

 

I didn't mean that I was to be a part of the picture. That is why I allow her to enjoy herself without my interference.
Her needs and desires were a lot more then being a sperm depository for me or even having me beating off while watching them. I realized her needs and desires went further then anything that I could offer her. I would make love to her, as a woman would, being tender , loving and caring and my cock out of the picture. She seemed to emerge and enjoy herself more when she didn't have to deal with a big dick poking at her. We built on that and that is why I continue to encourgage her bi play.
The one time I did somewhat participate, I felt like a third wheel anyway, inhibiting their time together.
My wife has certainly benefitted from the experiences. She has a better libido and looks at life with a more positive perspective.

 

I know partners need to consult each other about sex and sexuality, but to be honest I find the word 'allow' distastful, she's your wife not your child or a pet
S

 

Wtf

 

I'm stating an opinon about something you have written
S

 

I'll try and explain myself a bit more.
I'm in an open relationship and we discuss openly whats good for our relationship and what could harm it.
I don't think adults in a relationship can 'allow' each other if they want the relationship to be equal.
a boss 'allows' his or her worker to take an extra day off a mother allows their child to have a bag of candy.
yes its semantics, however unless we put thought into the words we use I doubt thought goes into relationship dynamics ethier.
if you are recently exploring an open relationship, think about this, because unless its clear and discussed, your going to encounter all sorts of issues
S

 

I think this is more about an open relationship than the fact that your wife is bi

But that's just my take on it.
Personally, not my thing. I've tried being in a poly relationship before, and it wasn't a horrible experience but it's not something I'd pursue (unless of course it's me trying to run away from the person I'm dating, which I did once and then realized that it was really me just expressing that I didn't want to date him, and ended it before anything poly/open-like happened)

 

I agree with Samhain, your wording is very telling

10 bucks says your wife leaves you for a woman

 

I think everyone is being a little harsh here. I think he means he allows it to happen. Yeah, it is her choice to decide to do it, but he ALLOWS it meaning he is ok with it. If he did not ALLOW it it would mean he was ending the relationship with her, not that he is not permitting her to do it. That's what a relationship is. By saying he allows her to experiment, it means he accepts that she wants to experiment and is ok being in a relationship where that happens.

Give the guy a break.

 

I agree. You're talking to this guy far too harshly and not helping him with the advice he's asking for.

He's asking for your guys opinions on the scenario, not your opinions on his wording for the situation.

It just seems slightly confrontational and trivial to the matter.

 

I wonder if he abuses his wife, it kind of sounds like it

 

Wow, someone is going to have to fill me in here. Why the hostility?

It's pretty thick here.

 

there is no evidence at all in this thread that he abuses is wife
in another thread he stated that he was responsible for his wifes bisexuality, which is just not true, one person can't make another person bi and in this one he 'allows' his wife, I think this is very disrespectful, however I have outlined my views above
S

 

yes, i was joking about the abuse part just to annoy people

I have also outlined my views

 

so just to repeat that was a joke.

I feel that I have been respectful with my points of view and would have said the same thing to a friend round my house
S

 

I understand what you are saying, and it makes total sense to me.

However...

Perhaps you are failing to realize that not everyone has the same life experiences that you do, and therefore may not realize the things you have come to realize through your experiences. Don't you think a little compassion is in order here? Help him to see this, don't beat him over the head and call him an idiot.

Not everyone sees things the way you or I do. And I am not attacking you, because you are my friend. I just felt that everyone is attacking the guy instead of constructively trying to help him out.

Do you see what I am saying?

Some of the comments in this thread are completely uncalled for.

That being said, I still love you guys to death, so don't take my words to mean I think you are bad people.